We all sleep alone soundly; Maybe the key to a happy marriage is separate beds

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• hperrin@lemmy.ca ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  I sleep better when I’m next to my wife.

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  • Alfredolin@sopuli.xyz ⁨6⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    I also sleep better when I’m next to your wife

    … Sorry, my pre-Lemmy internet use has corrupted me.

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    • tacosanonymous@mander.xyz ⁨6⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      “I also choose this guys’ wife.”

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• RebekahWSD@lemmy.world ⁨12⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Me and husband each have our own blankets and sheets and such on the one king bed. Cause he’s a furnace and I’d explode if I got that hot. It’s much nicer.

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  • MaggiWuerze@feddit.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨hour⁩ ago

    My wife always claims that I “steal her blanket”, so we also got one each. But they’re each 2x2.2m so if we wanna share one, we can

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  • frank@sopuli.xyz ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Scandinavian sleeping, it’s the best!

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  • Bigfish@lemmynsfw.com ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Add ear plugs and you described by bedroom

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    • CmdrShepard49@sh.itjust.works ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      How do you ear plug people hear your alarm in the morning? Ive considered trying it but I already have a hard enough time waking up.

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• Acamon@lemmy.world ⁨12⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Married and swear by seperate beds. It’s amazing if you’ve got the space. But it is good to make sure you get plenty of “lying about in bed together” time. But it’s great to be able to go off to your own bed after for a peaceful, undisturbed sleep. and5 being able to read a night or get dressed in the morning without worrying about disturbing your partner.

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• ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.works ⁨12⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  I’ve dated one person who could not bear to be touched at all in her sleep (but she insisted on sharing the same bed, which made things awkward for me) and another person who snored, but I think that humans probably generally sleep better together. It isn’t a sexual thing - look at non-human animals and how they often sleep cuddled up together. As a kid, I shared a bed with my grandfather (we lived in a small apartment) and I would fall asleep hugging him, and as an adult I slept better when I could cuddle up with my dog.

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• masterspace@lemmy.ca ⁨6⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  We all sleep alone soundly

  XD XD XD

  Oh my sweet summer child…

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  • Worthess@discuss.online ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Wah? You wanna cuddle?

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    • masterspace@lemmy.ca ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Ass to ass.

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• jqubed@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  I guess I’m in the minority that I have a harder time sleeping without my spouse than with. I realized about six months in that I’d rapidly developed some sort of dependence where I would fall asleep quickly if I spooned her. She had surgery in January and spent several weeks in the guest room so she could avoid the stairs, so we’ve tried being apart. It is nice if you have the space/budget for a king bed, though, to spread out from each other some.

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  • Worthess@discuss.online ⁨10⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    The idea about separate beds is that that needn’t be separated, sometimes they could be pushed together.

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    • CmdrShepard49@sh.itjust.works ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      But then someone gets stuck in the crack in the middle, which will lead to arguments and divorce.

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    • Zorque@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      The Thin man did have the perfect marriage…

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  • bobs_monkey@lemmy.zip ⁨7⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    I’d absolutely love if my wife and I could do the separate bed thing, but she ain’t having that for similar reasons you describe. As such, we won’t live anywhere that won’t accommodate our cal king bed, because she sleeps like a starfish and queen and smaller is a no go.

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• Stalinwolf@lemmy.ca ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Nah. My wife snores like hell, but I can’t fall asleep when she isn’t there.

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• ThePantser@sh.itjust.works ⁨12⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  My wife and I have separate sheets and blankets, it’s almost like our own beds. It’s some good sleep.

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  • Worthess@discuss.online ⁨10⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    That’s a good middle ground. Good for you both

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• Flamekebab@piefed.social ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  I sleep much better when my wife is nearby. We have a super king though so she isn't exactly smushed against me, she's just nearby.

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  • Worthess@discuss.online ⁨10⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Big room, big HUGE bed

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    • Flamekebab@piefed.social ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      The room is pretty tiny so it's mostly bed!

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• HowlsSophie@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Me and my husband HAVE to have separate beds. He moves around a lot and it’s like being in an earthquake.

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• toomanypancakes@lemmy.world ⁨12⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  I’m a fan of the big bed and separate blankets strategy. It’s similar, but you don’t have to get up to cuddle, you just scootch closer.

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• Metostopholes@midwest.social ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  I like John Hodgman’s suggestion: Couples should sleep in two beds, in two villas, separated by a reflecting pool.

  I mean, I would like it if I could afford it.

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  • Worthess@discuss.online ⁨10⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Death by drowning to sleep walkers, though

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• mang0@lemmy.zip ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Hasn’t the idea of “sleep divorce” been circulating In news recently?

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• dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Been doing this since the pandemic. And no, it’s not a dead bedroom situation, not by a longshot. We just have wildly different circadian rhythms, sleeping habits, we both snore, all of which was leading to consistently interrupted sleep for both of us. This was the only compromise that didn’t impact anyone’s health. Sharing a bed all the time is romantic, but hardly practical in the long run. Especially when prostatitis and peri-menopause enter the picture.

  It’s also been a godsend for when anyone gets sick. Plus, a ton of decorating options opened up for both of us - it’s nice.

  Also: the royals do this. With all the wealth the Windsors have, giving everyone their own private suite was where they landed. Makes you think.

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  • masterspace@lemmy.ca ⁨6⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    LMFAO, you’re using the Royals as your example of romantic loving couples?

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  • jqubed@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    The royals often weren’t marrying for love either, though, so I’m sure separate rooms helped with keeping some distance from someone they might not actually like and also made it easier to entertain their paramours.

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• some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  We do separate beds. Mostly because I have a clinical sleep disorder. But we also have different mattress preferences, so even then I could make a case for it. Works great.

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  • Worthess@discuss.online ⁨10⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Snore… you snore it’s okay… it’s called apnea. A lot of us have it…

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    • some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨9⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      No, I’m bi-polar and need a very regimented sleep-hygiene to not slip into bouts of insomnia. I snore too (yes, sleep apnea), but she didn’t say we need separate beds because of that. I said we need separate beds because if I can’t sleep, I can’t perform. And a long string of insomnia can trigger a manic episode. But thanks for the armchair diagnosis.

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• FreshParsnip@lemmy.ca ⁨10⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  There’s an episode of How I Met Your Mother where Marshall and Lily try this

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• RBWells@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  When my kids were babies and slept in our bed, people would tell me “they need to learn to sleep alone” and I would laugh and tell them no, sleeping alone is so easy, you have to have practice to be able to sleep with someone else.

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