Kolanaki
@Kolanaki@pawb.social
I’m just a weird, furry, pan guy (cis he/him). I also have a big, blue username.
Currently on Earth for 8 years ensuring steps to unite humanity and usher us into the galactic civilization just so I can see my boyfriend again.
- Comment on "You Wouldn’t Steal a Car”... But Would You Pirate a Font? 52 minutes ago:
I very much remember trying to pirate a few fonts as a teenager because I only found them on paid sites and them shits were over a hundred dollars. For a font!
- Comment on Glock Solo 1 hour ago:
That’s what I need to beat Sifu… A gun.
- Comment on Tap the tree 1 hour ago:
Truly.
I tap them with my weapon, they die, I loot spriggan sap from the body.
- Comment on Do you think Square Enix should remake other Final Fantasy entries? 1 hour ago:
I would like 3/6 to get the FF7 treatment, especially since it would be cool to see in 3D.
- Comment on Go Catch it. 1 hour ago:
Extending this change to and working backwards from the story of thanksgiving, the natives and pilgrims having dinner together is just a euphemism for an orgy.
- Comment on When you count, your lips don't touch until 1 million. 2 hours ago:
What if I say “um” somewhere because I lost my place?
- Comment on I'm jealous 2 hours ago:
I don’t either, but I am in California and I don’t know if it’s because they also learned it makes shit spoil quicker (literally I learned this from working at a grocery store that had them), or if it’s a legal thing to conserve water.
- Comment on I'm jealous 2 hours ago:
People were upset they added misters to Auswitz for the museum tourists? It’s not like they were spraying them with lethal poison like they used to.
- Comment on You never forget your first 4 hours ago:
To which my response was “Well… Nintendo doesn’t suck.” They clearly didn’t test that slogan amongst children. 😌
- Comment on I use Zip Bombs to Protect my Server 4 hours ago:
How I read that code:
“If the dev’s bullshit is equal to 1 gram…”
- Comment on Although i love it 4 hours ago:
Ricing cauliflower doesn’t make it taste like rice.
It makes rice that tastes like farts.
- Comment on I will step on you and spill your food, my small friend 4 hours ago:
I am just considering the post to be the title of a book.
- Comment on I will step on you and spill your food, my small friend 4 hours ago:
I got a stray that hangs around and does that weaving between my feet thing just walking over to where I can smoke, because he wants me to pick him up. If I don’t pick him up, he goes from weaving between my feet to screaming and biting me.
- Comment on You never forget your first 4 hours ago:
I can’t not hear “SON OF WAR” instead of “It’s all I want” in that song 🤣
- Comment on How Will We Know If The Trump Tariffs Were A Good Idea? 5 hours ago:
We already know. We already know they’re bad.
We know because the negative effects are already happening, and literally every expert on the matter has said they are fucking stupid.
- Comment on You never forget your first 5 hours ago:
I grew up in the SNES vs Genesis war and I only knew one person with a Genesis and even they thought the SNES was better.
- Comment on You never forget your first 5 hours ago:
Crazy Taxi had them on the soundtrack and it was a Dreamcast game… Maybe that?
- Comment on What would this list look like for your generation? 5 hours ago:
CaseOh: “Chat, we’re cooked.”
Chat: “Pls don’t eat us!”
- Comment on What would this list look like for your generation? 5 hours ago:
“Ratchet” would probably be up there.
- Comment on Squint your eyes 👀 14 hours ago:
Sure.
- Comment on I'm jealous 20 hours ago:
It’s actually not even good for them. It’s entirely for the presentation to the humans that buy them.
- Comment on The crossbow 😭 1 day ago:
Could you fucking imagine if instead of this going out of style, all English letters just became random shit bent around to form them? Like the text of this comment could be whimsical as fuck.
- Comment on So true 1 day ago:
It hits just as hard today, IMO.
- Comment on How to get a package to the right owner? 1 day ago:
I’ve heard of this scam, but I also don’t know how fast change of address works. I sometimes get the occasional package post marked over a year prior arriving at my doorstep with the address of my apartment, but for a previous tenant.
- Comment on Why am I seeing political ads for Donald Trump in April of the year of his second inauguration? 1 day ago:
Because he’s a narcissistic, egotistical, megalomaniac and loves seeing his face and hearing his own voice.
- Comment on Are we all suffering from "future shock" in 2025? 1 day ago:
It’s not really so much the rapidness of the changes, but what is rapidly changing that worries me.
If we were rapidly moving towards progress, I’d be fine. But we are rapidly going fucking backwards.
- Comment on PewDiePie: I installed Linux (so should you) 1 day ago:
Now I really don’t want to install Linux.
- Comment on [Digital Foundry] Oblivion Remastered PC: Impressive Remastering, Dire Performance Problems 1 day ago:
This is such a common problem with games on any iteration of Unreal Engine, and has been for over 2 decades.
- Comment on I wonder what the specs are on the technology that disables shopping cart wheels 1 day ago:
You could probably do it with a Flipper, maybe? They work on radio waves and I know you can use a Flipper to, like, change someone else’s TV channel or open their garage.
- Comment on Peak evolution (after crabs) 1 day ago:
Proof that Cassius Clay was, in fact, a jellyfish.