RBWells
@RBWells@lemmy.world
- Comment on What's the point in getting married? 30 minutes ago:
I didn’t ever marry my ex, was irritated at how discriminatory legal marriage was back then, and we had kids so were a family anyway.
My husband now? He really wanted to be married, and “stepdad” is a different legal status than “mom’s boyfriend”, it smooths things when he had to do school pickup or doctor visit. So since he pushed and I did see an upside we did.
Also you can’t foster or adopt here unless you are married - unmarried man in the household is a known risk to the kids he’s not related to. Statistically, it raises the risk of the kid getting hurt so single people can, or married couples but not unmarried hetero couples.
I am with you logically, I don’t need it, and don’t feel different and it’s weird for the state to license families. I understand religious marriage but am not religious.
- Comment on Who's That Pokémon? 6 days ago:
Caw! Caw!
(Thank you! Thank you!)
- Comment on Who's That Pokémon? 1 week ago:
Corviknight. A seven foot tall crow is terrifying!
- Comment on Straight people, do you know what the Grindr notification sound is? 1 week ago:
No, I would have no idea. It’s a standard notification? You can’t choose the sound? If it was a ladies site I’d say “vibrate” would be the obvious choice, but for a gay men’s site, no idea.
- Comment on How do people develop feelings for someone? 2 weeks ago:
25 is so young. For me, I just had casual relationships until something “stuck”, for lack of a better word. Stayed with my ex for 25 years, with my husband now for 11, we are so happy together and the sex is still good. Husband said he knew at the start he would be serious about me, I didn’t know until it lasted and got better and I liked his family, and his kids liked me and all our kids got along (more complicated situation when older, obviously) AND the sex stayed good and we still felt affectionate and loving.
I would say, at your age, it’s entirely possible you just haven’t met someone yet who you can feel that way about. You do have to be open to it if you want it, if that makes sense.
And I need to add- it’s not a requirement for a full and happy life, if you don’t want to pair up you don’t have to.
- Comment on It's a sin in Christianity to consume media based on ancient mythology and folklore? 2 weeks ago:
Not as far as I know. My mom was Christian and read plenty of mythology, visited Egypt and learned about their ancient gods, it’s my understanding that they just aren’t supposed to worship or believe in other gods. Not that they are supposed to be ignorant of the past or of other current religions either.
I don’t know about more fundamentalist sects, but she was Christian her whole life, well read and into learning about history and religion in general.
- Comment on Why do people insist on not answering ALL the questions in an email or text message? 2 weeks ago:
I’ve been reading the responses and it reminded me of the class I took called Business Communications, where they emphasized that CYA style communication was absolute nonsense, your responsibility when communicating is to convey information in a way that can be received, and if that doesn’t happen it’s your fault, not the recipient’s, you can’t control them only you.
So if this is just one person who misses all the questions, sure, it’s them, but you still need to figure out how to get your answers. If it’s everyone, it’s you. Maybe these questions aren’t amenable to email, maybe it’s your format, if you want answers (and not just to prove you asked in some sort of gotcha game) you need to ask the people who aren’t answering why they aren’t.
Everywhere I’ve worked, people answer these by choosing a different font color and writing answers back in the email, but there are not a lot of questions by email. Maybe a note to “provide answers in BLUE” with the word blue in blue font would help?
- Comment on DIY Solar Dehydrator 2 weeks ago:
Yes, our air holds so much water. Which is great for a lot of things, but everything mildews.
- Comment on DIY Solar Dehydrator 2 weeks ago:
Ha, I would not try this where I live, it would work in the desert but in a humid climate I can’t imagine it would be effective.
Cool though.
- Comment on From a purely political perspective, if you oppose the US tariffs as a US resident, should you buy or avoid buying products subject to tariffs? 2 weeks ago:
I don’t see how buying or not buying is going to hit the guy who is doing this.
As long as you aren’t buying trump-coins or whatever they are called, or a Tesla.
- Comment on If you could add, remove, or alter one single bodily function, what would it be? 2 weeks ago:
In the end there can be only one!
I like this, but you can’t have kids and be immortal, that’s a recipe for overpopulation.
Would enjoy not aging past adulthood (or not past 45, that was my “vampire age”), but life has to end unless you want all the same people around forever and no or very few new ones.
- Comment on [deleted] 2 weeks ago:
Was he asking you directly if you thought he could make pro? Then no, I think your honest opinion is the right answer.
If this was just unsolicited parental advice then yes, jerky thing to say. He will figure it out soon enough, right? 16 is when recruiters start looking and if he doesn’t get attention then he should know, I don’t think it’s the kind of thing you have to point out.
My kid who was a good - not - great athlete leveraged it for a good high school career and a scholarship to help with college, and an alright college sports career, there’s no reason to squash him down, if he enjoys the sport it can still be good for his life.
- Comment on How do you answer the question "What's new with you?" when nothing happens in your life? 2 weeks ago:
Nothing much, you?
- Comment on Hello, ladies! 3 weeks ago:
This has to be a generational difference but the unopposed moustache screams gay to me, because when I was a young adult only my gay friends had that style. I cannot shake the association. It seems like it started with some guys being ironic then got picked up by the mainstream.
Can’t wait for the shorts that are actual shorts to come back too, I’m tired of men passing of culottes as shorts. If they are longer than your knees they aren’t shorts. They are mediums or something but if they are not short, they aren’t shorts.
So a no from me.
- Comment on How can you oppose tariffs, while supporting a hardline against China on Taiwan? 3 weeks ago:
Where I live, they prop up companies with tax breaks, subsidies, sometimes will reimburse for wages even, to try to get businesses to establish and employ here.
That “chips act” was a national version, right?
We could also just do a lot more redistribution from the top, and try to advantage small businesses more. You can’t do everything from the top, a lot of a real economy has to grow from the ground, right? Nationalize healthcare so it’s not employer-based to encourage entrepreneurship.
I’m sure there are many more actions that could be taken - there is a huge opportunity for improvement in our economy but most of it relates to breaking up the top and growth from the bottom.
Tariffs are a tool, sure. But not the only one, and I’m not convinced they are tackling our main economic issues here, at all, certainly not as implemented. As one part of a more comprehensive progressive reform they might help but that’s not the way these guys roll.
- Comment on How can you oppose tariffs, while supporting a hardline against China on Taiwan? 3 weeks ago:
No, they could use other means to reinvigorate manufacturing here, if that is even their goal. I tend to agree that this race to the bottom was a mistake, the chasing ever cheaper labor hasn’t done anything for the majority. But it’s only one part of the inequality we are suffering here. There is no method to the madness as far as I can tell. And to your last point (crashing the economy) I can’t even tell if they care about that.
- Comment on How can you oppose tariffs, while supporting a hardline against China on Taiwan? 3 weeks ago:
Nobody is “against tariffs” - they are used everywhere. We are against this ridiculous random implementation that makes no sense. Mr. Trump is not using them like a scalpel, to grow manufacturing here, I don’t think he cares about that. He seems to think they are some way to bully other countries into doing what he wants.
- Comment on How do you pronounce "centaur" and why? 3 weeks ago:
Sentour.
- Comment on Do you eat shrimp shells when eating shrimp? 3 weeks ago:
No. It absolutely interferes with my enjoyment of shrimp, I don’t want to be interrupted with the crunchy unpleasant skin and tail, no. Take them off and make a shrimp broth, then you keep the flavor and the texture. I hate when the tails are left on in pastas & pilafs or similar. If it’s a shrimp boil I peel them.
- Comment on Why dont more people live in smaller communities , appart from economic opportunity (WFH is making it possible if not prefferable too) 3 weeks ago:
If you measure your life only in dollars, maybe. Maybe.
- Comment on Why dont more people live in smaller communities , appart from economic opportunity (WFH is making it possible if not prefferable too) 3 weeks ago:
My mom came from a small town and said she’d never raise a kid in a small town - her cousins, all save one, were in jail or pregnant before they graduated high school. Because there was literally nothing to do.
I like having restaurants, a good library system, concerts, bars, not needing to drive to get anything. I like living in a mid-sized city, but if I couldn’t, would go bigger not smaller.
- Comment on Today's Survey. One point for everything that you have NEVER DONE 3 weeks ago:
- Never owned a whole encyclopedia.
But probably -1 for not only rotary phone but “party line”; sometimes you couldn’t use the phone because someone else, in another house, was using that line.
- Comment on [deleted] 3 weeks ago:
Jason Isbell 24 Frames.
You thought God was an architect, now you know. He’s something like a pipe bomb ready to blow. And everything you built goes up in flames in 24 frames.
- Comment on [deleted] 3 weeks ago:
Nah, more like prostitution. Y’all were providing something to them, like escorts. If you were of a legal age to do that it seems fine to me - dangerous sure (lucky you got the right crowd) but not trafficking, they didn’t trick you onto the boat or sell you.
- Comment on [deleted] 3 weeks ago:
We were settled by Puritans. I do not personally care, and my mom and dad didn’t either. It is not some sexual thing to stay naked while doing my hair and skincare, it’s practical because nothing gets on my clothes. We do have specific family friendly nudist resorts in the US but that’s countercultural, you are correct our culture is prudish.
- Comment on The other shoe drops, and this time it is covered in dog shit 4 weeks ago:
This is my life. A few years ago I decided to think about it differently - something happens, but I have the money to cover it. Gave up.
- Comment on Why do we even do mens vs womens sizes for clothes? 4 weeks ago:
The fuck is a “woman-shaped woman”?
- Comment on Why do we even do mens vs womens sizes for clothes? 4 weeks ago:
Shapes need to be different, as others have already said. So men’s and women’s clothes do need different construction. But sizes could be just measurements. Absolutely. Yes.
Shoes, no. They should all be length in cm and then a narrow, medium, wide, xwide.
- Comment on Was Donald Trump ever cool? 4 weeks ago:
Not as far as I can remember, first memory of him was some story about him stiffing vendors.
- Comment on is it likely that someone like this will change? what would be her possible mindset for doing all this? 4 weeks ago:
It sounds to me like she needs a scapegoat, for lack of a better word, and she’s chosen you to dump on. Do your best to ignore her and don’t feed it. Her opinion doesn’t determine your worth in any way, it’s irrelevant.