RBWells
@RBWells@lemmy.world
- Comment on What's the deal with breakfast in bed? 2 minutes ago:
The heck? I thought both eating and brushing sort of soften your teeth temporarily, so better not to eat right after brushing OR brush immediately after eating.
- Comment on American public transit 1 day ago:
Yeah that’s where I am, and with some exceptions (there has been a one-bus route to the university at all my residences, like walk a few blocks, get on a bus, relax, end of the line is the school) it’s so difficult to use the bus system, one transfer and you are hosed. If I had a magic wand, I’d reinstate the trolley lines to their original farthest reach plus stadium and business districts, make all buses run every 15 minutes (the routes are reasonable) and make it all fare free, or an easy and cheap subscription, wave phone or ticket.
- Comment on American public transit 1 day ago:
Ah. For me the most direct possible route has car road, buses (yes three of them, and oddly, this only happens in a couple of places and home to work is one of them) and sidewalks, and the roads are 35mph ones so if pedestrians are on the sidewalk I take the bike in the road, if it’s clear I take the sidewalk.
Our old location, it was different - there was a way to walk between my kids school and the office, but no safe bike route and car had to go on the highway and loop around, the road didn’t exist, and house to work no way but car, it had a bus stop but only the bus to the next city passed it, and that one you have to board in downtown so I know what you are talking about. Even with the express bus between downtown and work it would have taken a couple of hours. And driving took between 10 minutes and 50 minutes depending on traffic (bus subject to same traffic) So glad they moved into the city.
- Comment on American public transit 1 day ago:
Huh. My office is about 30 minutes walking too, but 5 minutes drive and about 15 by bus (only because there are literally 3 different routes that happen to run between a couple blocks from my house to a block from my work, so the fucking half hour frequency doesn’t apply - I specifically live near bus lines always but they slashed the frequency) . I actually bike in every day unless it’s raining.
- Comment on If a girl asks you if you're big, are you supposed to lie or not? 1 day ago:
I cannot imagine asking a guy his size. That is rude as heck.
If you have to answer “big enough” or “haven’t had any complaints” seems reasonable though honestly I’m having trouble putting myself into the mindset of someone who would inquire.
- Comment on How often should moderators post to grow a community? 5 days ago:
I mod the !cocktails@lemmy.world and usually will put something once a week or so. It sees slow and steady growth but not sure if I have much to do with that.
- Comment on hows keto working out for you 5 days ago:
I am 5’9", was 125lb, bulked at the request of my husband, wanted to get to 135 but ended up at 150. I’m sure my proportions are more conventionally attractive now but it does a number on my self image, I was so attached to being thin. Guess what though…
I feel better at this weight physically, if not mentally. Everything works, nothing hurts. I feel so silly complaining about being at a medium weight but it is more than I have ever weighed when not pregnant and it fucks with me.
Having got here, it seems to want to stick, but I’m 57, that was not true for me before my 50s and I guess I’m glad I gamed the system by starting out underweight?
- Comment on Caw caw 5 days ago:
I have long toes, like the lady in the first picture, and kinda long but not wide feet and already it’s hard to find shoes that fit correctly, I can’t imagine how both her toes and long toenails appear to be fitting in the sandal. Maybe she has her feet pulled back for the picture, but take a step and those nails will be hanging over the edge. Also how is her second toe so much longer than the big toe? So that long toenail doesn’t go past the second toe? What is going on here?
- Comment on i enjoy high fructose corn syrup too 1 week ago:
I live in a subtropical climate and it seems like most typical garden plants are not really good for our weather, it’s too hot for some and too wet for many who like hot.
Our winners are:
Trees- starfruit, longan, mango, papaya all do well.
Garden -
summer, wet season - Okra mostly. Hong Tsoi, Eggplant (little ones) Watermelon (little ones) sweet potato (Stokes Purple), tomatoes, basil.
winter, dry season- Collards, peppers, broccoli (Green Magic) cauliflower, arugula, fennel, lettuce, radishes. Cilantro, or dill. A lot of the typical northern summer plants can be started in December or January to grow in the “spring” that runs from January to April ish.
In between - peppers, fennel, mustard greens, eggplant, pumpkin type squash (but bugs always eat it) tomatoes.
- Comment on Can mental health medication change nature of dreams? 1 week ago:
Medication can absolutely affect dreams. Flu shots give me weird dreams the first night. Benadryl suppresses my dreams, but the next night they are so intense.
Also, realize the time you wake up makes a difference - if you sleep and wake up naturally you may not remember that you dreamed, but that is very healthy. The dreams taper off as the “awaken” chemical increases.
- Comment on What flavor are marshmallows? 1 week ago:
It is vanilla (almost certainly artificial), sugar, and gelatin. You can make marshmallows at home.
There is a marshmallow plant, the roots used to be used to make a whipped candy (that’s where the name comes from) but now they are literally just air and sugar, gelatin and vanilla, maybe a little cream of tartar.
- Comment on Would I sound taller if I gave my height as 6'-4"? 2 weeks ago:
Wait, are you a lady? Just say you are 5’10". I’m about your height and guys are always telling me I am at least 5’10".
- Comment on do you remember a time when societies were so polarized and shifted so much to the right like today? How long did it last? 2 weeks ago:
Not exactly. I am old enough to remember wondering why gay couples couldn’t get legal marriage, and when interracial couples were stared at, and the ozone layer had a hole, and the Satanic Panic, but it felt like we were in a shitty spot but moving in the right direction just painfully slowly. Lots more violence than now.
- Comment on Sage advice? 2 weeks ago:
But does your sausage have sage in it?
- Comment on Is anyone NOT steaming their Music? 2 weeks ago:
Huh. I get my money’s worth and more from streaming, have found so much music I like, and before streaming I listened to the radio (we have good community radio here, I still do listen to the radio and go to live shows) and went to concerts but didn’t buy music because I despaired of ever building or organizing the sort of collection that would contain even close to the amount of music I want to listen to.
If streaming disappeared tomorrow, what I’d save wouldn’t pay for even one concert a month.
I really, really use the heck out of it, my whole family does.
- Comment on Does being a ‘hero’ mean you are a perfect person? 2 weeks ago:
Of course no person is perfect, and in literature a perfect person would be boring.
In my view, anyone who does something selfless that really helps other people or person, because they see the need to help, is a hero. They don’t need to be good in every other way. Just that they use their powers for good.
Villians can be nice, too. With some fatal flaw that causes great harm.
- Comment on [deleted] 2 weeks ago:
They don’t define “lifestyle” at all in that article. I imagine if I had to live in a cave and fight to get anything, I’d never reach whatever the natural max lifespan was, and would doubtless die in childbirth without skilled midwifery but it’s hard to imagine max being 38 when fertility for modern women lasts past 40, and we can live to 80 or 90. Are we not the same basic model?
- Comment on The problem with overeating is that it feels really good 2 weeks ago:
Well thanks anxiety, I guess? When I eat like that I feel awful. As someone else noted though, fasting can feel good, too virtuous. Until the headache.
Falling asleep at night empty but not hungry, that is the best feeling to me. Like eating enough in the day that my body understands it’s been fed but long enough before sleeping so I don’t feel full at all.
- Comment on Being a dude sucks 3 weeks ago:
I love spiders, really like to see them; but they don’t have a chance against the cats. The cats play small creatures to death.
Palmetto bugs though? I am so irrationally freaked out by them, I do ask the man, or my kids, to handle those. There was a next top model episode where the ladies walked with big hissing cockroaches, pet ones, and I would have been right out of there like a rocket.
But ask me to hold your pet tarantula? Heck yes! Cute fuzzy spider.
- Comment on How do I stop sleeping through everything? 3 weeks ago:
Did 5 hours feel good? Everyone is different. I like 7 hours and cannot nap, it has to be all at once. If you keep waking up at night and feel tired in the day ask your doctor, there may be some cause, not just lifestyle.
- Comment on How do I stop sleeping through everything? 3 weeks ago:
Sleep until you wake up. See how many hours you need. Then adjust your schedule until you are getting enough sleep. And pay attention to the number of hours - for me 7 can be more refreshing than 8! You may need 9, you want to be waking up at the right point in your sleep cycle, not while you are so very asleep.
I sleep pretty heavy, but when it’s time to get up I can. Do not go back to sleep, get up when you wake up. But really, try sleeping until you wake up.
Putting your lights on a timer may work better than an alarm, more gentle so you have time to come to awakeness more naturally.
- Comment on How long can someone physically walk for? 3 weeks ago:
Ha! Nope, lady and I guess technically no, don’t need to stop but it would get very uncomfortable!
- Comment on [deleted] 3 weeks ago:
No. If you are still thinking about it, you know what the right answer is. Apologize, and yes explain your baggage if you want to but that is your own issue, I don’t think it’s a good idea to justify an apology. Just “Sorry about the argument, I didn’t mean to get so loud, I’ll try to explain my thoughts more calmly if you want, when you have time.”
- Comment on How long can someone physically walk for? 3 weeks ago:
Without rest? I don’t know. I could walk a marathon distance with the right shoes but would need to stop to pee. Two marathons? Probably not without training some months, and where would I find the time? Also, if it was in the day here, risk of heat exhaustion is pretty high at midday & afternoon.
300 miles? No.
- Comment on Which career to pursue? 3 weeks ago:
My mom always said "don’t try to decide what you are doing for your life, just decide what you are doing for the next 5 years and commit to doing it for 5 years, you can always change. "
I do accounting, and some sysadmin stuff, I like accounting because you can do it at any company in any industry, or government, or whatever - nearly everyone deals with money. I do not try to go up a career ladder but it’s there if you want it and are good with people, as you move up that gets more important than the numbers!
The kids, a mix of medical, science, military, and one who I think will become an electrician. The oldest who stayed in military and quickly rose through the ranks is rolling in cash, so if you literally have no ethical concerns, that is one way to really rake it in. Second highest earner (and balanced life) is a genetic counselor, so a medical specialist but not doctor.
I think you are taking the right approach, mostly here to say that it’s really ok to just have a job that pays the bills, especially if you like writing, finding something that gives you enough money but also enough time to work on that might be a better life, and really what you are trying to do is build a good life, yes?
- Comment on How could I order a package without my parents finding it? 3 weeks ago:
Hiding the delivery of the equipment seems the least of your problems. Where are you planning on setting this up that you could hide it? Power consumption? Whatever this project is,nif you live at home and can’t tell your parents about it, how do you expect to hide it?
- Comment on Should you copy a person's accent when pronouncing their name? 3 weeks ago:
This is my approach. You are gonna get a kind of Americanized version because I can’t help it, but:
We have an Irinya in our department, soft r, I sounds like our long E - I am not gonna call her Irine! Soft R I am familiar with from Spanish, I’m sure it’s not spot on as she is Eastern European but close enough for her, she says it sounds right. One lady on our team can’t even hear what the R sounds like and can’t make the sound, she calls her eeReenya with the hard R. Still acceptable to Irinya, that’s what matters.
If it’s some sounds I can’t pronounce, I’d ask what they want to be called if I can’t make those sounds but in general yes I try to pronounce people’s names as they do, to the extent I can.
- Comment on do you use non violent communication at the workplace? 3 weeks ago:
No, but we don’t use violent communication. We use direct communication, and unfortunately sometimes CYA communication, though I push back on that.
- Comment on Dinner is ready! 3 weeks ago:
Ay I am torn between G and E, African food is incredible and I’d probably be ok, but G is where I live and my city has amazing food, including African cuisines so if you just mean what’s available in those regions, then G, absolutely.
- Comment on Lies, all lies 4 weeks ago:
We went to a concert of Tibetans doing the throat singing and it was cool as fuck.
Introspective arythmic diddly jazz is my music kryptonite. Similarly, the taqsim that is the opening part of so much good Egyptian music. It sounds abusively selfish to me. I do like a diverse array of genres but picky about jazz, or anything without a rhythm.
