Stalinwolf
@Stalinwolf@lemmy.ca
- Comment on iRobot’s revenue has tanked and it’s almost out of cash | "Roomba customers are understandably concerned about the impact these current financial troubles might have on their home cleaning robots." 2 days ago:
Bro, I just bought a Roborock a few weeks ago and I love it. I was panic reading these comments until I saw yours and realized it’s a Roborock, not iRobot. Hope our housebots don’t meet the same fate.
- Comment on He's on a mission 6 days ago:
“Oi, Dutchman!”
…
“O hallo!”
- Comment on Dyslexia 1 week ago:
She got a stank to her, sure… but she knows her way around a circus peanut.
- Comment on Learning to drive 1 week ago:
I have so many memories of my dad driving us up to the corner store, beer in hand, to put $5 in the tank and rent us Megaman 4.
- Comment on 🙋🏻♂️ Praise be to our Lord on high 🙋🏻♂️ 1 week ago:
Cheesing is a state of mental euphoria which is triggered by sniffing a cat’s urine. One common method involves positioning one’s face behind a cat.
- Comment on NOW! 2 weeks ago:
Years back when I worked for Kmart, there was some sort of large Samsung Galaxy tablet advertised as a Black Friday front-page exclusive for only $40. As you can imagine, people were ready to kick the fucking doors down to get their hands on those, because anyone dumb enough to participate in the Black Friday madness is definitely too dumb to know why 1gb non-expandable storage is next to fucking worthless. Not to mention they had the weakest hardware imaginable, with a whopping 1.5 MP camera.
Black Friday is such a cheap illusion.
- Comment on PC Master Race 2 weeks ago:
The number gets higher and higher every time a oconsole dweeb makes the argument that they’re not constantly fucking themselves.
- Comment on It's very thick and lustrous. 3 weeks ago:
It’s a nice one, too. It makes the room feel like it’s full of music. Presidents only get the best braiders.
- Comment on Study Claims 4K/8K TVs Aren't Much Better Than HD To Your Eyes 3 weeks ago:
I don’t know if this will age like my previous belief that PS1 had photo-realistic graphics, but I feel like 4k is the peak for TVs. I recently bought a 65" 4k TV and not only is it the clearest image I’ve ever seen, but it takes up a good chunk of my livingroom. Any larger would just look ridiculous.
Unless the average person starts using abandoned cathedrals as their livingrooms, I don’t see how larger TVs with even higher definition would even be practical.
- Comment on Side Bar Bean Herder 3 weeks ago:
- Comment on plump pumkins 3 weeks ago:
- Comment on Public service announcement 4 weeks ago:
It is kind of wild. Some dudes have small dicks, big dicks, egg-shaped dicks… Stinky dicks with moles on them… Fat dicks with freckles… Dicks that look like sad elephants… Dicks that look like Shar Peis…
Then you have big vaginas, small vaginas, long vaginas, sleeve of wizard vaginas, jutting serrated-looking labia vaginas, wise old horse-like vaginas, cauliflower vaginas, meat pile vaginas, vaginas that look like Shar Peis…
And any of these… And I mean any of them… can be on the hottest person you’ve seen in your life. It’s like opening a Kinder Egg. Drop in a coin, pull the lever, and see what surprises await you in the dankest, steamiest, most razor-burnt region inside of your new partner’s pants.
- Comment on feeling fruity 5 weeks ago:
Don’t mind if I do!
- Comment on They say remote working less productive 5 weeks ago:
Same. 7-3:30 most days. Some an hour or two earlier. I always crash out after lunch, or guaranteed by 1:30. At that point I’m just walking around trying to find shit to do.
- Comment on Emperor of overpromising Peter Molyneux says he's done with games after Masters of Albion, which is also his 'redemption title' 1 month ago:
It wasn’t terrible for what it was. I just remember being let down after years of listening to my best friend’s other friend telling me all of these promises he had fully subscribed to. It all sounded too good to be true, but both us and the industry itself were too young to have experienced overpromises like that. I thought maybe I just didn’t know how far technology had come, and we were about to see it fully manifest in all its glory…
But what we got was a fuck load of bloom and branching choices.
- Comment on Former BioWare lead writer reads the runes on EA-Saudi deal and speculates that 'guns and football' are in, 'gay stuff' is out, and the venerable RPG studio may be for the chop 1 month ago:
Guns and football seem pretty gay to me…
- Comment on More Ships Join Greta Thunberg's Gaza Flotilla to Break Blockade 1 month ago:
In Grade 6 we has a new girl in my school who I got on with really well. The cooler guys among us apparently thought she was dope too, and when I started dating her suddenly, one of them was like, “Congrats, bro. I didn’t know ya had it in you!” I was on top of world.
Then one day shortly after, she showed up to school with this super tight, greasy, old lady perm. The can’t that’s like flat to your head. The thing looked bonkers. I spent the next couple of days trying to distance myself from her and that haircut, and found some petty reason to break up with her. She thought I was a total asshole (rightfully), but moved on. Years later I saw her again and that old lady cut was gone.
Flash forward to my mid-twenties, I’m dating this other girl and she goes and gets a new haircut. Blonde dye job and everything. I can only describe the results as a genuine Dutch Boy. But I had learned my lesson and I stuck it out. I wasn’t going to make that same mistake over a haircut. A short while later she fuckes some greasy dude from Raleigh, North Carolina, and that was the end of that.
- Comment on Missing banana for scale. 1 month ago:
“Holy FUCK, boys! He looks t’ be about a ten footer!”
- Comment on Why does my brain think I still need counterpoints for arguments I had ten years ago? 1 month ago:
It has to be ego. I set my ego aside constantly and try to be open minded, and I am very open minded, but sometimes in privacy it’s just so goddamn big for no fucking reason… Like when rehashing a 10-year-old argument in the shower.
- Comment on The Rapture could have happened, but nobody would know because everyone got left behind 1 month ago:
There are a few new missing persons reports on (what were) the last twelve remaining good people on the planet. The rest of us are down here jacking off in the bathroom with the fan on because parenthood has made it increasingly difficult (and way too risky) to do it in front of a computer.
- Comment on Everyone thinks the Deus Ex remaster looks awful and they're right: 'They really turned those 1999 graphics into 2003 graphics' 1 month ago:
Somethingsomethingsomething UNATCO? 😶
- Comment on This hairstyle is really going to....take off. 1 month ago:
- Comment on whats your dumb purchases? 1 month ago:
Coke Zero is a newer diet option formulated to taste similar to original Coke, with the presence of a mild artificial sweetener flavor that is more recognizable to those who are sensitive to the taste. Diet Coke, on the other hand, was created decades before they had decent sweeteners. While it still has a sizable following of people who like it, Diet Coke tastes nothing like original Coke, and has a flavor more akin to the smell of hot plastic.
This is pretty consistent across all brands now, at least from those that I’ve tried so far. The new Zero versions are much, much closer to the original formulas.
- Comment on whats your dumb purchases? 1 month ago:
My pregnant wife asked me to get her a fountain Coke Zero from Costco the other day… I paid for the thing and waited patiently for my empty cup. When I approached the dispenser, I found that all three Coke Zeros were out of order. I had no choice but to fill it with Diet Coke. It was the lowest Costco experience of our lives.
- Comment on arriving 2 months ago:
Not to mention they’re the two most nostalgic seasons, by a landslide. At least in regions that experience four seasons. There is nothing quite like the quiet promise of Spring after a long winter. One day you step out and warm sunshine is making your roof drip, and grass begins to show through the thinning snow. Familiar birds return and you spot the year’s first vegetation poking up through the soil. You can smell the Earth again. You’re flooded with memories of being a kid during the same months, lying out in the yard feeling that warm breeze blowing in.
Summer creeps up and slowly wears you the fuck out. Most of the flowers dry up and the grass gets scorched. Everything looks like shit, and right when you get tired of it all and want to throw yourself off a bridge, you notice the leaves turning yellow at an alarming rate. Nights grow cold, mushrooms pop up, and you remember how pleasant brittle leaves sound rattling along the street. Things get real damp and take on that nutty smell of decay. Some primal part of you gets real amped up for harvesty things.
Halloween night brings with it the last echo of life, then the world grows quiet and dead. The frosts come and snow falls. Christmas is real cozy, and then a month later you’re eyeballing that bridge again. Doesn’t seem so high. Might be nice to throw yourself off it every now and again.
- Comment on Know your place 2 months ago:
I was on 2C-B and lounging about in my brother’s room, staring at a big glowing plastic moon I had bought for him as a joke, when somehow the word and concept of it sent me spiraling down a rabbit hole of cosmic realization. At first the moon (or perhaps my thoughts surrounding the moon) began to rotate like a planetary body, becoming a parent star in a galactic arm, and eventually the central mass of a galaxy itself, ever turning with long tendril arms orbiting around its perimeter.
As the question of it grew, it became the universe itself, on a profoundly metaphysical level, and I came to the realization that every single living organism, both here and elsewhere in the cosmos, are not so much a part or some greater plan or design, but are instead just individual cells and appendages of recently awakened universe. One that has blinked its eyes from a deep sleep and has slowly become self-aware. And just as a child born blind will at some point use their hands and discover they have a body for the first time, we are tiny (but not insignificant) appendages of that universe discovering and exploring itself, trying to make sense or what it even is.
I found immense comfort in the idea that there is no greater meaning to everything than that. We’re just a part of something bigger that is at this very moment trying to make sense of itself, and I don’t need more than that.
- Comment on It's finally here! 2 months ago:
For years now whenever I submit bookings for potted plants/floral at work, there is an entry down toward the very bottom that reads “Flowering Planter 7in Ass” and it gets me every time.
- Comment on Fuck you in particular 2 months ago:
Carbon nanotubes are real? I thought that shit was invented for upgrades and repairs in No Man’s Sky…
- Comment on When real life generates the shitpost 2 months ago:
How are all these fucking idiots still confused that disliking the Israeli government has fuck all to do with disliking Jews? Do they know this, and just choose to make it about something more?
- Comment on 2 months ago:
