Guinness wasn't proud of this one.

Comments

• redlemace@lemmy.world ⁨14⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  I only feel sorry for the Guinness World Record judge

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  • Billy_fuccboi@lemmy.world ⁨14⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    I just imagine them being very clinical about it. Just standing there with a clicker in one hand and a timer in the other.

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    • redlemace@lemmy.world ⁨14⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Yet 48hrs before the ‘event’ at Guiness HQ

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    • hOrni@lemmy.world ⁨14⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      You gotta at least wear eye protection.

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    • finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world ⁨6⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      “Wait a minute, sir, I have to call my boss. Walter, do we count dry orgasms?”

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  • diffaldo@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨14⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Imagine the smell 🤢

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    • slothrop@lemmy.ca ⁨13⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Pineappley?

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• Berengaria_of_Navarre@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

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  • Fedizen@lemmy.world ⁨7⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Professional wankers switch hands every five minutes. It helps to rest each arm each session.

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    • ouRKaoS@lemmy.today ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      That’s a gooner move, resets the clock so you can go longer

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• new_guy@lemmy.world ⁨13⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  That’s one jerk every 9 minutes.

  I can only imagine the pain in their balls and arm they must’ve felt after a while.

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  • bizarroland@lemmy.world ⁨12⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Their prostate must have looked like a dehydrated pumpkin Image

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    • jade52@lemmy.ca ⁨12⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      This pumpkin looks how I feel

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    • phx@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Their dick probably didn’t look much better. Even with lube that’s gonna chaff after awhile and probably took off at least a layer of skin

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• LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masterbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of women masterbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.

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  • GreenKnight23@lemmy.world ⁨7⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    y’all should try to break the record.

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• gigastasio@sh.itjust.works ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  “…after the previous holder died from his last attempt.”

  He died doing what he loved…

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  • anomnom@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    …Himself

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• LurkingLuddite@piefed.social ⁨6⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Fake. 36 red bulls would literally kill a horse, let alone a human, even if they weighed as much as a horse.

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  • redlemace@lemmy.world ⁨22⁩ ⁨minutes⁩ ago

    Nah … The info is not 100% conclusive but it’s a huge risk to say the least. Still, there is more that does not add up. 36 can’s equals 9 Liters (304 US ounce) of red bull … Try washing down 9 Liters of a super sugary (lightly-) carbonated drink.

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  • ouRKaoS@lemmy.today ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    The LD50 for caffeine in humans is 150-200mg/kg, so if you weighed only 36kg, that ain’t enough caffeine to kill you.

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    • LurkingLuddite@piefed.social ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Go ahead and test those numbers yourself.bReport back to us how 20 grams of caffeine goes.

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• FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world ⁨13⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  don’t they send someone over to watch you break the record

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  • HowAbt2day@futurology.today ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Not just one but a bunch of nuts cum over.

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• PhobosAnomaly@feddit.uk ⁨14⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

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  • robocall@lemmy.world ⁨14⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

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    • Fedizen@lemmy.world ⁨7⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

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• mossberg590@lemmy.world ⁨6⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

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  • robocall@lemmy.world ⁨6⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    haha pump

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• HexesofVexes@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  2 short of true headline greatness.

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• CanadianCarl@sh.itjust.works ⁨10⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  I can’t find the news article, so this might be fake. But I did find this.

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• Lemmyoutofhere@lemmy.ca ⁨9⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

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  • mEEGal@lemmy.world ⁨7⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    I know a challenging fap when I see one

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• hOrni@lemmy.world ⁨14⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  He must have very soft hands, I’m usually chafed after 6.

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  • FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world ⁨13⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    omg they could split this record into two categories - with lube/lotion or without.

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    • swab148@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Uncircumcised guys get a huge boost in the “without” category

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• zexyqag@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  How do they measure an orgasm?

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  • tomi000@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Multiple judges must be present and observing closely. They are experts in distinguishing moans

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• wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz ⁨6⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Did not know you could die doing that…

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  • OhStopYellingAtMe@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    You can certainly come to a sudden conclusion.

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• MacaqueAndCheese@lemmy.ca ⁨13⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  I bet he didn’t even use Margaret Thatcher’s Boner Smasher.

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  • bear@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    fasc-light

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