GreenKnight23
@GreenKnight23@lemmy.world
- Comment on Go with the flow 12 hours ago:
I get constipated a lot, comes with age.
I once ate three helpings of cream of wheat and a triple strength coffee, extra cream, extra sugar.
I still could not shit, for two days. then, like a demon, it ripped through my ass like a shit monsoon. my balls were drenched and the toilet was clogged.
luckily, I was at the gas station. one of the attendants walked in while I was tea bagging the sink to wash my balls and taint clean. their surprised scream jolted me and I slipped on the floor. I attempted to grab the only thing I could to stop myself from falling, the sink. It was filled with paper towels to stop the drain and murky shit water from my sack and taint. I ripped that sink off the fucking wall, covering myself with shit water.
an acrid smell filled the room from the clogged toilet and now my whore bath water flooded the floor. the smell must have finally hit the attendant, because they began to dry heave and cover their mouth and nose.
I never went back to that gas station, but I always laugh my ass off whenever I pass by it.
do not pair fiber with coffee. if you don’t die, you’ll wish you did.
- Comment on The Supreme Court Is About to Hear a Case That Could Rewrite Internet Access 17 hours ago:
all the better to remove the federal internet license requirements.
- Comment on I was diagnosed with early onset dementia and alzhimers. Is there safe guards I can put it up so I don't screw or kill anyone? Like who do I contact about being denied to own a gun? 20 hours ago:
if you can’t laugh at a tragedy, it could kill you.
- Comment on The Xbox 360 came out 20 years ago 20 hours ago:
why you gotta go around spreading so much hate around dude…
- Comment on [deleted] 20 hours ago:
I fucking love this. every single time I see it I laugh.
- Comment on The struggle is real 1 day ago:
if the options are wet or dry butthole, I’ll take dry.
I mean, I bathe regularly and don’t scratch my butthole so I don’t think there’s many positive tradeoffs to using a bidet if I have to walk around with a sloppy dripping crack.
- Comment on The struggle is real 1 day ago:
with what? a shit covered hand towel?
- Comment on Plex’s crackdown on free remote streaming access starts this week - Ars Technica 1 day ago:
can’t wait for this to start. then maybe I won’t have to hear about it from the jellyfin shills every week.
- Comment on The struggle is real 1 day ago:
TIL a bunch of people are walking around with sloppy wet buttholes.
- Comment on The struggle is real 1 day ago:
- Comment on [deleted] 1 day ago:
I like my trans girls like I like my horses.
hung like a bull and on all fours.
- Comment on What did I forget? 1 day ago:
I have met far more certifiably autistic black anime fans than white ones.
- Comment on Plex’s crackdown on free remote streaming access starts this week - Ars Technica 2 days ago:
I’m almost certain you changed your comment.
however, I fail to see the relevancy of proxies and tunnels to the content of the original post.
- Comment on Plex’s crackdown on free remote streaming access starts this week - Ars Technica 2 days ago:
just pay for a lifetime pass…
- Comment on Dead mosquito proboscis used for high-resolution 3D printing nozzle 2 days ago:
less interesting fact, my penis is a lower resolution than an elephant trunk.
- Comment on MAGA, rebranded! 2 days ago:
I like Trump. the fact that he’s president of the most powerful nation in history only means that I, a functional dimwit, have a chance to do the same.
- Comment on I can't eat it all! Don't be shy! 3 days ago:
I used to hate it, then one year someone brought raw greenbeans. no salt, no ham, nothing. just raw dogging greenbeans.
I hate greenbeans.
I’ll take overly cooked greenbeans that taste like soup and onions any day now.
- Comment on Elon Musk Had Grok Rewrite Wikipedia. It Calls Hitler “The Führer.” 3 days ago:
think of it like this. everyone thinks you’re an asshole, but I think you’re the asshole.
- Comment on **How** should I properly document my homelab? 3 days ago:
going for the nuclear option I see…
- Comment on Perfect size for brats 3 days ago:
- Comment on Corn me up, snake 🐍🌽 3 days ago:
Corn me up, snake
- Comment on I’ll just be over here… 3 days ago:
listen here you little shit…
- Comment on FACTS 3 days ago:
yeah but he was granted clemency in Florida
- Comment on Parking police 3 days ago:
- Comment on Scientific Exposure 4 days ago:
sure why not
- Comment on Scientific Exposure 4 days ago:
I’ll just start my own journal with blackjack and hookers.
- Comment on Google Revisits JPEG XL in Chromium After Earlier Removal 4 days ago:
this is what happens when corpos take over your standards and compliance boards.
- Comment on AI Slop Recipes Are Taking Over the Internet — And Thanksgiving Dinner | Food bloggers see traffic dip as home cooks turn to AI, inspired by impossible pictures 4 days ago:
my mother has something like 8000 cookbooks she’s collected from the 1930s to around 2015.
I think I’m set.
- Comment on AI Slop Recipes Are Taking Over the Internet — And Thanksgiving Dinner | Food bloggers see traffic dip as home cooks turn to AI, inspired by impossible pictures 4 days ago:
don’t forget to add the lye to your gravy this year. it makes it way less lumpy.
use it in a 1:1 ratio with the amount of water you use.
- Comment on An entire PS5 now costs less than 64GB of DDR5 memory, even after a discount — simple memory kit jumps to $600 due to DRAM shortage, and it's expected to get worse into 2026 4 days ago:
man I’m glad I got my 96gigs last year. fuck this mess.
I’ll hold out until the bubble pops and pick it all up for pennies.
