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If I go crazy will you still call me Superman?

⁨853⁩ ⁨likes⁩

Submitted ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩

https://slrpnk.net/pictrs/image/0ed24853-3e10-4ab5-b085-5219772f1a6b.jpeg

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Comments

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  • Kolanaki@pawb.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Doesn’t even need to be a magic rock. A regular one thrown at your head also does wonders.

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    • LemmyFeed@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Shit, even a crack rock can do it.

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    • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      In fairness, Doomsday beat Superman in a straight knuckle dust up, no kryptonite required. So that’s also a Superman weakness.

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  • skulblaka@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Image

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  • Etterra@discuss.online ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Everybody’s weakness is a rock if you hit them with it hard enough.

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  • bjoern_tantau@swg-empire.de ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    In Superman The Animated Series Batman (and the Joker) discover that a jade dragon is actually made out of kryptonite because the owners die after a few months.

    And in some of the stories Lex Luthor loses his hair because of his kryptonite experiments.

    So at least in those universes it’s also harmful for humans.

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    • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      And in some of the stories Lex Luthor loses his hair because of his kryptonite experiments.

      In Smallville, the spacecraft carrying Superman brings a kryptonite meteor swarm with it. Lex’s exposure to the meteors is the cause of his premature baldness and a partial reason for his resentment of The Alien.

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    • usernamefactory@lemmy.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      And in some of the stories Lex Luthor loses his hair because of his kryptonite experiments.

      In the mainline comics of the ‘80s and ‘90s, wearing a kryptonite ring day after day gave him incurable cancer.

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    • fartographer@lemmy.world ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Lex and Superboy are friends until Lex starts and gets caught in a chemical smoke party, which Superboy blows out with his super breath. In the process, he blows smoke into Lex Luthor’s hair, which falls out. Then Lex swears to, “use all of my scientific genius to one day destroy you.”

      Voice acting: 3/10 Animation: 3/10
      Writing: 2/10
      Overall rating: 10/10. No notes

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  • rumba@lemmy.zip ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Kryptonite lays him out right away even from a reasonable distance.

    Even the plutonium demon core won’t kill us right away.

    A little touch of hydrogen cyanide and we’re gone though. We’re fragile AF

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  • blimthepixie@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Ah man I’ve not heard Kryptonite in years

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    • thenextguy@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      I have a short playlist of Superman songs.

      Kryptonite - 3 doors down Jimmy Olsen’s Blues - Spin Doctors Superman (Its not easy) - Five for Fighting Superman’s Dead - Our Lady Peace (Wish i could fly like) Superman - The Kinks Superman - REM

      Always looking for more.

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      • TheTetrapod@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        What about “(I’m No) Superman” by Lazlo Bane, aka the Scrubs theme song?

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      • Zagam@piefed.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        You Don’t Mess Around With Jim by Jim Croce isn’t directly about him but does give good advice on treating this wardrobe with respect.

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      • blimthepixie@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        How could you miss Superman by Goldfinger

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      • TrickDacy@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        Silvergun Superman - stone Temple pilots

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      • LastYearsIrritant@sopuli.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        Sunshine Superman - Donovan

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      • sundray@lemmus.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        Superman - Love Spit Love

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      • TownhouseGloryHole@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        Superman’s Song - Crash Test Dummies

        I sing it to my son at bedtime.

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      • faintwhenfree@lemmus.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        Hero 77 - Bombay Street

        Mentions batman, superman, spiderman, Mr incredible, but it’s not a song about them.

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      • IchNichtenLichten@lemmy.wtf ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        www.youtube.com/watch?v=aKiVSuDEF2c

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      • bstix@feddit.dk ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        You forgot the best one: Kashmir - Bring back Superman

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      • Quetzalcutlass@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        No One Likes Superman Anymore - I Fight Dragons

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      • LastYearsIrritant@sopuli.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        Scrubs theme song

        Superman - Lazlo Bane

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    • bjoern_tantau@swg-empire.de ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      It’s so strange that nobody did a good music video for that song with scenes from Man of Steel. I always thought that one would fit great. There’s a Smallville one but I don’t like it very much.

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  • Assassassin@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    If we’re talking pure elements at room temperature, people can die from extended contact/eating/breathing beryllium, fluorine, phosphorous, hlorine, chromium, cobalt, arsenic, cadmium, antimony, cesium, mercury, thallium, lead, bismuth, polonium, radium, thorium, uranium, plutonium, and americium. That doesn’t even count all of the heavier than air gases that will kill you in a couple of deep breaths. People are very squishy and prone to getting injured by things.

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    • Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Also, if you throw them hard enough, all the other elements will kill you too.

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      • sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Depleted Uranium APFSDS Round says Hello!

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    • JackbyDev@programming.dev ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Eating a “normal” rock might kill you too depending on the size/shape/sharpness and how quickly you can get medical attention.

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      • Assassassin@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        Good point!

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    • ronl2k@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Would have been a more useful list if OP had excluded eating, since humans can be killed by eating almost everything not intended as food.

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      • Knock_Knock_Lemmy_In@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        sorry, can’t get the raw url from reddit

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  • sparkles@piefed.zip ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    I forget the exact number but a surprising amount of fellas are also confident about winning a fist fight with a bear, so, yeah. This makes sense.

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    • Event_Horizon@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      I means it’s simple really. As the bear charges, I dodge to the side, aim for the eye and with a quick jab…get mauled and die painfully

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    • frog@feddit.uk ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Bro, I will use my 3 months of bbj to slip behind the bear and put him in a rear naked choke. That’s right, I am going bear back.

      This is the moment I wake up from a mix of blood loss and concussion from one swipe of his paw.

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    • JcbAzPx@lemmy.world ⁨21⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Bears can’t make a fist, so they’re at a disadvantage. Now if it were a claw fight, we might be in trouble.

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    • Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      I’m sure I could outrun a koala bear. Which isn’t fighting, and koala’s aren’t bears, but I totally could!

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      • sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        … Koala bear wins in the long run via giving you chlamydia.

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  • altphoto@lemmy.today ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Anything solid of decent mass can basically do us in. A glass bottle with an I love Kitty logo on it at 70mph right to the skull for example. So yeah, a rock, so long as it is large enough, could do it.

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    • ironhydroxide@sh.itjust.works ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      It’s all about the joules imparted.

      A small enough rock going fast enough is just as deadly as a large one traveling slower.

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      • altphoto@lemmy.today ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Below the mm size it does get harder to make something deadly.

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    • pipe01@programming.dev ⁨13⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Hmm what if it didn’t have the hello kitty logo?

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  • TheGuyTM3@lemmy.ml ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
    • get near the white house
    • stop time
    • summon a 1lb rock of pure polonium 212
    • resume time
    • profit
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    • leftascenter@jlai.lu ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
      • get near the white house
      • stop time
      • summon a 1lb rock of pure polonium 212
      • resume time
      • profit die. You summoned 1lb rock of pure polonium 212 and stayed.
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      • TheGuyTM3@lemmy.ml ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Damn it, i knew i forgot something🤦‍♂️

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  • tomiant@piefed.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    “What if I pretend like people are saying something stupid and then cleverly refute it? Yes, that will make an excellent meme.”

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    • Agent641@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Image

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  • slappyfuck@lemmy.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    I don’t understand. The point isn’t that we are not vulnerable to something similar, it’s that Superman is nearly invulnerable. So, my brother in Christ, this is not a retort.

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    • Johanno@feddit.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      What I wonder: according to lore the conditions where supermans people life on krypton are so harsh that they are a strong race that is like humans under those conditions.

      Now sth. With the sun is there too, but lets put that aside for a moment.

      So Supermans weakness is a rock of krypton. Because the rock itself must be super radioactive or sth like that.

      Anything that harms superman should kill every human in the area instantly.

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      • JustAnotherKay@lemmy.world ⁨20⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Must be super radioactive…

        Should kill every human in the area instantly

        Counterpoint: What if Superman has an element in his body that is crucial to his makeup that is specifically destroyed/harmed by the radioactivity, while that radioactivity passes harmlessly through any other element?An anti-krypton element of sorts, if you will.

        Krypton, for example, could be emitting a wave with incredibly low amplitude, but incredibly high frequency. This combination would struggle to make contact with the atoms in normally-dense objects here on Earth, but would strike an ultra-dense object like anti-krypton like a truck.

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      • Etterra@discuss.online ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        Dude it’s comic book magic and bullshit, don’t overthink it.

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    • killeronthecorner@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Exactly. I don’t claim to be some sort of super man

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  • Obnomus@lemmy.ml ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Nice try but I eat Uranium for breakfast.

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    • Etterra@discuss.online ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      That’s just so many calories.

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    • Cliff@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      I think we all eat Uranium for breakfast.

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      • Honytawk@feddit.nl ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        Speak for yourself, I eat cyanide and hydrogen

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  • subterfuge@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    So is kidney stone

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    • shalafi@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Been through two medical fears already, catheter up my dick (3 times) and a broken femur. Kidney stones are still on my bucket list!

      Boss brought his to work one day for show and tell.

      “That came out your urethra?!”

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      • popekingjoe@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        As someone who has passed about a dozen over my lifetime… I wish you may never have to go through it. I’d rather have the catheters.

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  • ThePantser@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Yeah but uranium kills you after a bit, kryptonite takes him out instantly.

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    • Kolanaki@pawb.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      If that was the case, Superman would have died more than once.

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      • essell@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        I’ve not read the comics but I imagine hr has, a few times?

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    • hansolo@lemmy.today ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Arsenic and mercury, both commonly occurring metals present in rocks, can kill humans immediately. Especially if vaporized. Uranium can kill and disable quickly in high enough concentrations.

      Also, keep in mind it’s a plot device about a fictional flying space alien with laser eyes. It doesn’t need to follow the laws of physics.

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      • himitsu@lemmynsfw.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        But then they’re not rocks. It’s a vapor or a metal. That also actually disqualifies uranium as well since the rock isn’t what’s dangerous, it’s the radiation that destroys your cells. With Superman it’s literally just a rock.

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    • OneStepAhead@lemmynsfw.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      What if the uranium (depleted)is traveling over 1000fps from a GAU88? Checkmate atheist!

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      • LORDSMEGMA@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        I believe the gau-8 muzzle velocity is around 1000 meters per second

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    • FlexibleToast@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Doesn’t kryptonite just rob him of his power and severely weaken him? It’s like uranium both the time accelerated.

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    • Tollana1234567@lemmy.today ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      it only weakens him, longer exposure can kill him. blue can negate his powers, red makes his inhibitions less. theres also gold and black(synthetic)

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  • Oppopity@lemmy.ml ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Yeah but I’m not super. How’s he supposed to call himself super if he’s weak to the same shit I am.

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  • Agent641@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Most rocks are my weakness, if thrown hard enough

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  • TheJesusaurus@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Rock + Isaac Newton = death

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  • watson387@sopuli.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Image

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    • LemmyFeed@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      That’s my kind of rock right there!

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  • Lemmyoutofhere@lemmy.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    One big rock from space can wipe out the entire planet.

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  • skisnow@lemmy.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    I defy OP to link me to a source of someone both:

    1. unironically making fun of Superman for having a rock as his weakness, and

    2. not already being challenged immediately on their statement within that same source

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  • DarkSideOfTheMoon@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Not only a single type. There is a lot of toxic or radioactive elements in nature

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  • Itdidnttrickledown@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    plutonium is also poisonous beyond the radiation it emits.

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