shalafi
@shalafi@lemmy.world
- Comment on It's a simple thing, but one good way to make games memorable is for the developers to leave you words of encouragement in the pack-in material. 2 hours ago:
Walked up on my step son playing with headphones on in the dark. He jumped.
- Comment on If there's a sort of "apocalyptic" event but there are still surviving communities, will people be able to make eyeglasses again, or are people with vision issues gonna be fucked? 2 hours ago:
I do much the same, make a tube out of my hands like I’m using a monocular. Works!
- Comment on If there's a sort of "apocalyptic" event but there are still surviving communities, will people be able to make eyeglasses again, or are people with vision issues gonna be fucked? 2 hours ago:
I have never put on a pair that was even close to my prescription. In fact, this post made me realize I’ve been wearing my old glasses all day and that’s why I have a headache.
- Comment on worst uber driver ever 3 days ago:
And ask if he’s human.
- Comment on Help. 3 days ago:
“OK, now let’s have some fun. Let’s talk about sex. Let’s talk about women. Freud said he didn’t know what women wanted. I know what women want. They want a whole lot of people to talk to. What do they want to talk about? They want to talk about everything.
What do men want? They want a lot of pals, and they wish people wouldn’t get so mad at them.
Why are so many people getting divorced today? It’s because most of us don’t have extended families anymore. It used to be that when a man and a woman got married, the bride got a lot more people to talk to about everything. The groom got a lot more pals to tell dumb jokes to.
A few Americans, but very few, still have extended families. The Navahos. The Kennedys.
But most of us, if we get married nowadays, are just one more person for the other person. The groom gets one more pal, but it’s a woman. The woman gets one more person to talk to about everything, but it’s a man.
When a couple has an argument, they may think it’s about money or power or sex, or how to raise the kids, or whatever. What they’re really saying to each other, though, without realizing it, is this: “You are not enough people!”
I met a man in Nigeria one time, an Ibo who has six hundred relatives he knew quite well. His wife had just had a baby, the best possible news in any extended family.
They were going to take it to meet all its relatives, Ibos of all ages and sizes and shapes. It would even meet other babies, cousins not much older than it was. Everybody who was big enough and steady enough was going to get to hold it, cuddle it, gurgle to it, and say how pretty it was, or handsome.
Wouldn’t you have loved to be that baby?”
― Kurt Vonnegut, God Bless You, Dr. Kevorkian
- Comment on Help. 3 days ago:
- Comment on Have you ever noticed no one ever looks at a penis and then says, "wow, he must have big feet." 3 days ago:
LOL, there’s a bit! In middle school gym class, us boys had to shower together, and yeah, height = shoe size = dick. I have seent it! And the couple of black kids were indeed packing anacondas, sporting an “S” in their whitey-titites.
And before y’all call me a perv, us little boys were going through puberty and were very concerned about this issue, checking each other on the down-low. We were also terrified of popping a random boner in those wimpy gym shorts because, damn!, those 8th grade girls were tall and fine! We were also too dumb to figure out why they skipped gym class a couple of days each month, so there’s that.
Best part was the popular, handsome guys with toddler dicks that stuck straight out! Man, fuck 'em.
I am the exception that proves the rule. 7.5" hard (on a good day) , 5’8", 8.5 shoe. Over and under all the way around! Whatever. Best compliment I ever got on my penis? Sitting on the rocks by the Gulf, she pulls open my jeans and her eyes bugged out. 'Nuff said.
OK, I’m drunk, gonna brag, why not? I got stories and I’m not sure how long I’ll be on Earth. (Heart/lung issues, not suicidal.)
Turned down a stripper neighbor. Helped her move her white-trash ass and her kids after getting evicted. She was thanking me and leaned in for a kiss, pretended to miss it, spun on my heel and walked off. Heard her stutter step on the driveway! 😆 Like I’m going let this woman manipulate me like all the other simps. Damn but was she hot!
We went to my house to party, she didn’t seem interested, told her that her and the kids could crash, went to bed un-laid. :( Next morning I hear Saturday morning cartoons, “Aw, crap, kids are up.” She busts in the room with a butter knife, looking violent, asks if the door locks. “Um.” She pries up the door frame and jams the knife in. Fucks my brains out for a few, rolls off, “Well, that was better than I expected.”, leaves. “Um.”
OK, one more while I’m rattling drunk.
Gf and I were having the throw-down fight. Ya know? The final boss fight where words can’t be taken back? I won’t relate the evil shit I said.
“Look at you! You’re scrawny, you’re an alcoholic, and if your dick wasn’t so big you wouldn’t be worth nuthin!”
“Um.”
I have no idea why I wrote all that.
- Comment on Why don't these AI data centers build by the ocean? 4 days ago:
You nailed it. Every time desert data centers are criticized around here there are several BS explanations. You got the correct answers in one sentence.
- Comment on Aspergers officinalis 4 days ago:
4 years isn’t it? I looked into it back in the 90s, decided hell no. LOL, it was suggested to dig a 4’ deep trench to plant them.
- Comment on Drug Enforcement Administration agent used Illinois cop’s Flock license plate reader password for immigration enforcement searches 4 days ago:
Can you imagine how bad it would be if the fascists felt free to kick in any door in an unarmed society? The mind boggles.
- Comment on [deleted] 4 days ago:
Gross to me personally, yes.
- Comment on [deleted] 4 days ago:
Nine tenths of the anime I see on lemmy is little girls. Most popular? Little girl lesbians kissing. I can no longer take anime fans seriously.
And this is from a guy who started on Robotech as a teen! Anyway, here’s my wife.
- Comment on [deleted] 4 days ago:
I neither hate nor judge them, but all the yiff shit around here grosses me out, block it at every occasion.
- Comment on [deleted] 4 days ago:
Me neither. Firefox on Windows. Who knew?
- Comment on Drug Enforcement Administration agent used Illinois cop’s Flock license plate reader password for immigration enforcement searches 4 days ago:
A Palos Heights police officer has been disciplined and retrained
That is automatic fired in any place I’ve worked IT.
The detective stated it was “common” to allow others in the group to use his login for drug investigations
That’s an investigation in any place I’ve worked IT.
State legislation prohibits Illinois license plate reader data from being used for immigration enforcement purposes.
Like that matters.
Meh, read the damned article. It’s more damning than I can post about.
As usual, I’ll sign off by saying, get strapped, learn gun safety and local laws, practice, be ready to fucking die in a firefight. Human rights will never come cheap to defend. But in no case lie down for this shit. Don’t have a “brown people” pic, but they’re as important as any of us.
If your life is more important than your liberty, you do you, I will not judge. But I’ve made my own decision on the matter.
- Comment on Protest footage blocked as online safety act comes into force 4 days ago:
Reminds me of NYC cops bragging about taking away pellet guns.
“You… you can’t be serious?!”
And guess where ICE is operating. I’ll give you three guesses, but you’re only going to need one.
- Comment on Protest footage blocked as online safety act comes into force 4 days ago:
Seems like the law was meant to exclude the full-size Swiss army knife. They’re great for most pocket knife purposes! But having damaged nerves on two fingertips from non-locking knives, yeah, I won’t touch one. Although the “classic” is a great everyday pocket knife!
Funny enough, I was hiking today with a small "Rambo knife affixed to my backpack strap. Do I need that on a hike in the woods? LOL, hardly ever. But it’s nice to have when I do need it.
Thanks for saying all that! We’re clearly on the same page.
- Comment on Anyone else from Europe feels the same while browsing the "All" feed? 4 days ago:
Let’s not bring the Netherlands into this. I can get the gist from English or German, but Dutch is right out. Weirdos.
- Comment on Anyone else from Europe feels the same while browsing the "All" feed? 4 days ago:
35-years out of French class and I parsed most of that!
- Comment on The virus she told you not to worry about. 5 days ago:
Right?! A LifeStraw would catch that.
- Comment on Bet you don't remember this 5 days ago:
Brad Pitt wore a chicken suit and waved signs at LA intersections. If he can talk about it, Larry can.
- Comment on Perplexity offers to buy Google Chrome for $34.5 billion 5 days ago:
These AI companies know damned well it’s a bubble, they’re not stupid, they just can’t risk missing out on being the next Microsoft or Google or FaceBook. It’s the highest stakes gamble I’ve ever seen and there’s so much money tied up that it will crash the US economy when it pops.
- Comment on Protest footage blocked as online safety act comes into force 5 days ago:
FFS, you can’t carry a 3" pocket knife and if you carry any pocket knife it has to be the dangerous kind that doesn’t lock.
- Comment on Broccoli Blooms 5 days ago:
Green onion bulbs are a delicacy! You can eat the flower, but it’s not as juicy and a little papery.
- Comment on Is Meta Scraping the Fediverse for AI? 5 days ago:
Go ask ChatGPT what it knows about lemmy $user. Try it.
- Comment on Wikipedia loses challenge against Online Safety Act verification rules 6 days ago:
We had those in elementary school, along with corpses and a decapitated rhino. Maybe that explains Gen X.
- Comment on They don't make 'em like they used to 6 days ago:
Got a couple of drill bits like that. They won’t fit in any of my power tools, you really do have to use the hand crank.
- Comment on Lemmy be like 6 days ago:
You forgot CEOs and landlords.
- Comment on HR people smiling at you thinking that you are a complete moron 6 days ago:
You should have kept the Mac, seriously. I often had no response trying to get laptops back from employees and was asking HR if we couldn’t get a form for new hires to sign regarding company equipment returns. Can’t remember the reasoning but HR told me the company is basically powerless to force the issue. In any case, the legal costs of suing you would quickly stack higher than $7K.
- Comment on NPR Sunday Story - an approachable story on why privacy matters and the invasiveness of surveillance capitalism - Lemmy.World 6 days ago:
Used to be! When I was a kid and we had 3 or 4 TV stations to choose from, and they all pretty much reported the same factual news. Being seen as having a bias was poisonous. People picked a news anchor to watch according to how trustworthy they felt he way. Imagine that!
