She clearly doesn’t know how to talk to men either.
dating
Submitted 2 weeks ago by SSUPII@sopuli.xyz to [deleted]
https://sopuli.xyz/pictrs/image/ec5cb7bd-8362-42af-9f12-baa5e7161cb0.webp
Comments
GreenBeanMachine@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
monkeyslikebananas2@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
YoU hAvE tO rEaD bEtWeEn tHe LiNeS Or sOmE sHiT - her probably
Sternout@feddit.org 2 weeks ago
It’s literally a first contact. These apps are exhausting and texting requires effort from both parties.
unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de 2 weeks ago
Even funnier with the timestamps
mushroomman_toad@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 weeks ago
9/11 of a conversation
Manticore@lemmy.nz 2 weeks ago
Tbf she made zero effort to converse with OOP either
markovs_gun@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
This is the bumble experience lol. The man still has to do the real first message because the woman’s first message is going to be “hey” 99% of the time.
ptu@sopuli.xyz 2 weeks ago
As a man I also sent just hi to everyone. Reasoning behind that was that if there is any interest, they would reply with something. Like a ping. When we’d get to know better I could be more personal. Found a great partner this way, we’ve been together for 5 years now.
diffaldo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 weeks ago
tyyy
WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 2 weeks ago
Perfect match!
rumba@lemmy.zip 2 weeks ago
Hmm, ty
no, that’s to disinterested ^H^H
TY!
ohh, no that’s way too enthusiatic ^H^H^H
Ty
Now that just looks like a name ^H^H
Hey Grok, this person on the dating website said Hii \n Cool hair what should I send back? I want to sound slightly interested, but almost dismissive, like they need to prove that I’m worth their time, but so far I just said Hey
Grok: have you considered saying thank you?
eww, whole words? I’m not a geriatric
Grok: perhaps you could say ty
god, you’re not help, i already thought if that but i’m afraid it makes me sound too disinterested
Grok: Have you tried photoshopping their head onto a nude photo? I can help you…
god grok, you’re so useless, i’m just going to post tyyy, so it sounds like i’m saying thank yooooouuuu! like I mean it but in the least number of characters so it doesn’t sound like I mean it too much.
–probably
halfsalesman@piefed.social 2 weeks ago
The issue isn’t talking to women. The issue is talking to people you are attracted to.
I’m bi but I’m not attracted everyone. And I can tell you it takes a lot more from me to talk to someone I’m attracted to and I don’t think I could easily just be normal friends with someone I badly want to fuck and just have normal conversations with them.
SillyDude@lemmy.zip 2 weeks ago
You may entice a woman with a piece of cheese. If she accepts you may then ask her to wed you.
svcg@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 weeks ago
Cheddar? I hardly know her!
neukenindekeuken@sh.itjust.works 2 weeks ago
What kind of cheese are women in my area attracted to?
CatZoomies@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
Kraft singles in your area, I imagine.
UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml 2 weeks ago
Dubliner Irish cheese
captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works 2 weeks ago
Entice? I thought it was fascinate.
Honytawk@feddit.nl 2 weeks ago
Entice, fascinate, obsess, worship, become.
The degree varies between women.
UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml 2 weeks ago
chunes@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
The fundamental issue here is that they call this dating when it’s something else entirely. They should have made a new name for it when it became like sifting through resumes.
Karjalan@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
I don’t think anyone calls this dating? It’s the filter to figure out if you want to date
boonhet@sopuli.xyz 2 weeks ago
Dating apps
Online dating
But I agree that it’s more of a way to meet people to date, not actual dating
dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
like sifting through resumes.
Then we need to call it what it is: This exchange is an HR screen.
starchylemming@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
courting phase
I_Jedi@lemmy.today 2 weeks ago
Here’s a name for it: Intimate Individual Review Sessions. Prospective team members must engage in touchpoints so that they may energize their velocity for fast paced interview opportunities.
UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
Had a couple of friends who went on vacation to Europe - Spain and France, specifically - and had totally different experiences on the dating apps. Men were open and friendly, knew how to hold up a conversation (in non-native languages!), showed politeness, responded quickly, made first contact easy and low-anxiety, looked good, smelled nice, knew how to dance, charmed the panties right off them both, and then kept in contact afterwards. Like, even after they flew back home, these guys were still saying “Hey, what’s up, here’s something cool happening in my neighborhood can’t wait to see you again”.
Just a radically different experience than the American dating scene. One friend straight up swore off American men entirely. She’s booking a flight back to France for a three month go - working remote, learning the language, the whole thing - because of how blown away by the healthier and happier social conditions over there.
surewhynotlem@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
Tourist hunters. They know the game. They aren’t the norm.
LH0ezVT@sh.itjust.works 2 weeks ago
It’s a two way street. Some people need to go to some completely different place to relax enough, and some other people bet on tourists being relaxed enough.
I even remember that kind of effect from school, during school time I would always get into fights with kids that I was happily hanging around with in the holidays.
AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
Tourist hunters are different. They know France is, for some reason, the first worldwide destination and flock here to steal your wallets. They’ll be on the steps to the Sacré Cœur to tie a bit of string around your wrist while a comparse grabs your wallet, you’ keys, your underwear and your toupee.
zalgotext@sh.itjust.works 2 weeks ago
Imagine making a radical life change based on a dating app hookup
Teppichbrand@feddit.org 2 weeks ago
Once you go France
others don’t stand a chanceUnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
The apps reflect the underlying culture and social order. They weren’t the only reason. Go spend a week in the south of France after spending half your life in Galveston and you’ll understand.
echodot@feddit.uk 2 weeks ago
Yeah but that’s not dating that’s a hookup. Completely different ball game. Much easier to maintain a facade for a couple of days when both parties know that there is no potential for relationship.
Actual dating requires you to maintain for the long haul.
spionspion@lemmy.ml 2 weeks ago
Prepare for a changed experience. europe is hating the USA and US americans more and more every day. I get the ick when i hear americans on the street. Gtfo and kill trump.
quips@slrpnk.net 2 weeks ago
This is bad and you should actively attack these feelings. The majority of us despise this guy.
gandalf_der_12te@discuss.tchncs.de 2 weeks ago
It’s exactly as you say, people in France and some other places in southern Europe like italy and spain actually know how to treat women properly. and they don’t even have “feminism” (i.e. forced smiles and if you don’t behave you go to jail) there. What they have is common sense and centuries of experience with how to actually treat women well.
UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
they don’t even have “feminism”
I mean, they do have feminism. The trick to understanding feminism is to recognize how it benefits both genders when the walls of segregation and elitism come down.
Once you’re able to treat each other as peers, rather than income streams or commodities, you develop the kind of common sense they enjoy.
TheRealKuni@piefed.social 2 weeks ago
Women are literally just people. Talk to them like you talk to other people.
FartMaster69@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 weeks ago
That’s the problem
ArgumentativeMonotheist@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
But are they men? Have you seen gay dudes flirting? It ain’t the same. Sure, they’re people, what else would we all be? But they’re distinctively different from men.
TheRealKuni@piefed.social 2 weeks ago
they’re distinctively different from men.
They’re really not. Every person is different from every other person, but a woman is still just a person. And most people aren’t comfortable being treated like they’re different.
Be friendly and most people will also be friendly.
0ops@piefed.zip 2 weeks ago
Okay great, good stuff… Any tips for talking to other people?
TheRealKuni@piefed.social 2 weeks ago
Practice. Conversation is a skill like any other, you won’t be good at it until you work at it.
UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml 2 weeks ago
One dick pic coming up. Works on grindr. Dont worry, I always ask first.
sem@piefed.blahaj.zone 2 weeks ago
Do they send u one too? Did either of you say, “Ty, but no thanks I don’t like the look of it?”
TheBat@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
Yeah but I’m not looking to impress most people unlike my crushes
Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 2 weeks ago
It’s sad things like this that make me think, it’s too bad church is all fucked up with religion. Because “Entire families, plus any single individuals, get washed and dressed up, then join under the stained-glass windows to sit and stand and sing and go through the motions, while all the eligible sweeties pretend they’re not checking out all the other eligible sweeties, and have a whole hour to think of something to say to them over the coffee and cookies afterwards. Repeat weekly” is pretty much how a lot of people found partners for generations. Especially those whose families couldn’t afford ballrooms and country clubs.
EndlessNightmare@reddthat.com 2 weeks ago
I’d probably be open to the concept of a secular church. Not for dating, but just for platonic socialization and community.
tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip 2 weeks ago
I think there are some Unitarian Universalist churches that are secular
echodot@feddit.uk 2 weeks ago
There are of course things like hobby clubs you can join but you have to get lucky with those. There risk that you will just be distracted and end up with an expensive hobby.
sem@piefed.blahaj.zone 2 weeks ago
I actually found one in my neighborhood! It is called “Unitarian Universalist”, it is for secular and religious, everybody is welcome, you just have to agree to love each other, etc.
JackbyDev@programming.dev 2 weeks ago
Unitarian Universalist churches exist, but things like community centers are probably more what you’re looking for.
basxto@discuss.tchncs.de 2 weeks ago
you get coffee and cookies?
Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 2 weeks ago
I was raised going to UCC churches, it was standard practice at all of them. Many also used King’s Hawaiian Bread for Communion.
And they’re one of the LGBTQ-friendliest denominations, although because they’re non-hierarchical the individual churches vary. You can see if there’s one near you.
robocall@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
That guy is a keeper! Lock him down and he’ll be loyal for life! He doesn’t even know how to talk to other women!!
Honytawk@feddit.nl 2 weeks ago
Makes family dinners with his mom really awkward though.
Xenny@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
…she even…she even opened
Tartas1995@discuss.tchncs.de 2 weeks ago
It is bumble. She has to start.
FatVegan@leminal.space 2 weeks ago
They changed that. Now no one texts ever.
toxicbubble@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
bumble was designed so women could message first.
the messages: “hey”
Siethron@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
As a cishet man who isn’t passionate about hyping himself up and gets burnt out socially easily…
No one on dating apps is worth the effort required to overcome the illusion of comparison. We don’t know you and we’re not going become infatuated over what you can put in a profile. At most our interest will be piqued, but we know we have to compete with HUNDREDS of other dudes and …ehhhhh.
To put it another way if I was at a party and there was a beautiful girl surrounded by 10 to 20 dudes I wouldn’t even bother and instead try to have fun and talk to people I found interesting. But with dating apps pretty much every girl is always surrounded by guys like that trying too hard and the same guys are surrounding as many girls as possible since online they are not limited by the physics of space online.
Formfiller@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
Women are people so you talk to them how you would talk to another person
Kolanaki@pawb.social 2 weeks ago
I was taught to treat others the way I want to be treated, but this causes friction when I want to be harassed and catcalled the way cartoon construction workers harass snd catcall women, but women don’t like that at all. 😩
roserose56@lemmy.zip 2 weeks ago
You have to know stuff, you can’t just go there! Saying “hi” is a red flag, bad seed, you will be ghosted.
sundray@lemmus.org 2 weeks ago
Dating concerns of the modern era: “Now, how do I make it clear I’m not a murderer without looking like a murderer 🤔 .”
Dyskolos@lemmy.zip 2 weeks ago
I feel so sorry for generations having to use those stinky fucking pieces of shit predatory apps, designed to keep the majority of men single AND paying.
Also the method of “dating” there sucks so much, unless you’re just there for a quick fuck.
Not saying it was easier back then without those apps. Probably wasn’t.
smuuthbrane@sh.itjust.works 2 weeks ago
PSA: “tyyy” - thanks, ya yella yutz.
Such language. Tsk.
abbiistabbii@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 weeks ago
The most lesbian thing I have seen today.
DylanMc6@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 weeks ago
To whoever said that (or anyone who DON’T talk to people when trying to date): have you tried improv? Improv comedy would help you talk to people better, and would probably give you the confidence and courage
gandalf_der_12te@discuss.tchncs.de 2 weeks ago
omg damn that’s me. i ended up sending a shitpost meme/pic of my dinner to a female co-student. still waiting for her response.
realitaetsverlust@piefed.zip 2 weeks ago
The next generation of young men is going to be a split of lonely, sad boys and andrew tate wannabes lmao.
razen@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
Same bro same
djdarren@piefed.social 2 weeks ago
me_irl
kora@sh.itjust.works 2 weeks ago
Certified !me_irl@lemmy.world hood classic
mushroomman_toad@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 weeks ago
The apps are literally designed to keep you single
LH0ezVT@sh.itjust.works 2 weeks ago
While yes, that is the case, I cannot help but feel it’s not the app’s fault this time
UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
The Algorithm used to match people isn’t designed to encourage healthy and normal conversations. It’s designed to encourage people to spend more time on the apps (and, eventually, more money).
peopleproblems@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
I used to think this. Then I went on some dates, I made connections, etc.
But only once I started paying. The apps are built to maximize profit.
Hinge > Boo > Tinder > Bumble.
Electricd@lemmybefree.net 2 weeks ago
Most apps are owned by like 2 companies really
Chev@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
Worked just fine for me.
Feel free to ask for advice or whatever.