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School pickup lines are wild

⁨577⁩ ⁨likes⁩

Submitted ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨paranoid@lemmy.world⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩

https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/34d43642-4389-4776-99d5-c6b480b7a97c.jpeg

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Comments

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  • rImITywR@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    The fact that school pickup lines exist is wild.

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    • SoftestSapphic@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Sometimes, the parents forget to pick up the kids so the teachers get to decide if they leave a child all alone with no help or if the teacher works unpaid over time

      Greatest country in the world…

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      • shalafi@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        No. Bullshit. When I got cut loose from 70s-80s elementary I was on my fucking own. We could walk, ride, skate, whatever. We did not require a fucking adult to care for us. Bell rings? GTFO! BYE!

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      • bassad@jlai.lu ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Here if parents don’t show up, teacher have to call the police to pick the kid (it almost happened to me as I was 5 min late)

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    • AA5B@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      It’s always money.

      When I first moved to the town I live in now, I was impressed by the all new schools. However I eventually realized they replaced a bunch of older neighborhood schools with a smaller number of bigger schools. They saved money by providing a worse educational experience and making walking less likely.

      We walked to my kids elementary school but the town saved money by not plowing the sidewalks in winter, nor forcing residents to. Our walk would require walking on a major street - until my ex went full Karen and made them plow

      When my kids got to middle school, we were in “walking” distance so there was no bus. However that was a full mile including crossing a six lane road whose light was always broken. We ended up choosing a private school in a different town, so there were no buses nor walkability

      Regional school districts are now common. More kids goto schools that are not even in their towns

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    • TheJesusaurus@piefed.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      How do you envision kids being picked up after school? Free for all?

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      • baguettefish@discuss.tchncs.de [bot] ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        In my childhood in Germany kids didn’t need to be picked up or dropped off, we either walked or took public transit (not dedicated school buses either). As far as I can tell that’s still the case where I live. It’s a very different urban design that facilitates it, and it results in more human lives in my opinion.

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      • Stez827@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        We envision them taking a bus, walking, or biking home. Not them each getting picked up individually by their parents

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      • SkunkWorkz@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Well in my country if a parent comes picking up their kids by car they have to park their car and walk to the school to pick their kids up. Waiting in your idling car in front of the school while taking up the lane is not allowed.

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      • Olgratin_Magmatoe@slrpnk.net ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        I envision walkable communities

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      • BackgrndNoize@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Ever heard of a thing called a school bus

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      • fluffykittycat@slrpnk.net ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Get rid of this car oriented school design and make walking and biking viable again. Also school buses

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      • copd@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Just commenting to support and remind you upvote/downvote counts are not representative of correctness.

        I’m british and although it’s easy easy to believe we all walk and get thr bus, the TRUTH is 6% of our schoolchildren have fully complete end to end transport paid by the state (yes taxis) - this is usually due to negligence of the parents.

        There is a real requirement for kids to be picked up by cars and removing that option will only hurt the education of the innocent child.

        People on this site are very quick to binary extremism and would immediately struggle if given power of choice over others in real world scenarios.

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      • fatboy93@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Because other countries exist?

        I used to walk to school, later bike to school, went to school in a bus etc.

        Only times I got picked up/dropped off was when I was sick or had issues with other modes of transport

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      • balance8873@lemmy.myserv.one ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        You’re never going to win against these people. They all seem to think that if they downvote people enough the economic realities of cars will shift and magically the world will change while they do literally nothing to actually change it.

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      • shalafi@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        I’m American and just commented:

        When I got cut loose from 70s-80s elementary I was on my fucking own. We could walk, ride, skate, whatever. We did not require a fucking adult to care for us. Bell rings? GTFO! BYE!

        When my step-son was in elementary, 20-years ago, anything outside of a bus or parent’s car was a non-starter. Fucking pathetic.

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      • tyler@programming.dev ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        you’re getting downvoted because your numbers are drastically off. I posted a comment below, but in the US 33% of school kids are dropped off/picked up by car. Not 5%. That number jumps to 39% if you’re including those driving themselves to school. The average number of kids in school is 512 (in the USA) so that’s ~169 kids getting picked up and dropped off each day. Essentially 169 cars, maybe fewer depending on how many ride together. If the number was 5% (it’s not) then that would only be ~26 cars. Which is still a line, but not a long one.

        You made up a small number to pretend like the problem isn’t as bad as it is, and now you’re using a strawman to make it seem like we would still need cars for the made up number you gave. The conversation isn’t about needing cars, it’s about having car lines due to so many cars. If it were actually as small a number as that then no, we wouldn’t have lines like this, because that’s about the rate that developed european countries have for pickup/dropoff car rates. And those people are the ones telling you it’s not a problem in their country.

        programming.dev/post/39823707/20229448

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    • baggachipz@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      If only there were free public transport provided to every student outside a small radius of the school. That would make things so much simpler!

      Seriously, I can’t wrap my head around this. Back in my day, pickup lines simply didn’t exist. You walked or you took the bus.

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      • slaneesh_is_right@lemmy.org ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        We walked and biked even skied to school in the winter. Some kids had quite the journey. Now my nephew is 8 and and there are like 20 cars waiting in front of the school, or the closest they can drive. They also complained that it’s pretty dangerous because of all the traffic, not realising that they are the traffic. No car would be there without them. It’s madness.

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      • Trainguyrom@reddthat.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        If only there were free public transport provided to every student outside a small radius of the school. That would make things so much simpler!

        Just gonna throw this out there, while yes car=bad and carbrain is real, sometimes its just administrative bullshit that fails to consider the realities of their student’s and/or parents’ needs and living situations.

        When my kids started school, because my youngest is special needs and other specifics they both started around the same time in different grades. For the majority of the student body my town’s school district will simply bus between different schools plus a couple of specific designated points so that everyone who lives within city limits is within about half a mile of a place that the buses pick up and drop off. They require a parent/guardian present at pickup time for 3k-Kindergarten bus pickup and dropoff. For students in special ed they instead get to take the special ed bus which has extra staff and seatbelts and only picks up and drops off at the home and also requires a parent/guardian present. Both do pickups and dropoffs at about the same time. I’m sure you can see where this is going.

        Since my wife has been a stay at home mom (primarily due to daycare costs exceeding what she would realistically make) and can’t be in 2 places at once^[citation needed]^ we were forced to do our own pickups and dropoffs instead of bussing. I’m sure there’s similar levels of bullshit if your kids are in different grades putting them at different schools because the local school administrators seem to be really good at not fully thinking things through like that and usually require experiencing the consequences of their actions to change course on a decision

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      • Dozzi92@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Back in my day, the early to mid 90s, there were still pickups. There was a shorter line, it was easier, because there were fewer people.

        Where I live now, and where I lived then, there was cutoffs for the bus, like a mile or more. My town now, barely anyone is a mile from anything. There’s one bus for the school, and they use it for underprivileged and disabled students. Everyone else is on their own, and so if you live a mile from school, having your four or five year old walk sometimes isn’t feasible.

        We live about a mile from school. I drive halfway and park and we walk the other half, because I cannot stand the pickup line. But some people go, drop their kid, and head to work, and so it’s completely understandable that they use the pickup line.

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  • ThePantser@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Small penis alert

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    • FunctionallyLiterate@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      But he’s got YUUGGGEEEE balls! You can see them in the back hanging from the trailer hitch.

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      • MelodiousFunk@slrpnk.net ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Gender-affirming care.

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  • Pistcow@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    There’s a guy with 3 DUIs.

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    • Montagge@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      thedrive.com/…/ram-2500-drivers-have-the-most-dui…

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      • Glifted@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        I briefly contracted at SHAP (the plant that builds the 1500) and you’d have to be drunk to buy one of these piles of shit

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    • FunctionallyLiterate@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      This month.

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    • meco03211@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Saw this description of kid rock and it seems like it does here too. He’s got tattoos of his kids but not custody.

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      • defuse959@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Kid Rock makes music for people that know the age of consent in every state.

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  • Agent641@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Ohh, school pick up lines as in, a line of cars picking up students. Not pick-up lines, like “Hey baby, can you show me where music class is, cause I feel like playing in A minor.”

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    • percent@infosec.pub ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Welp, there’s my cursed upvote of the day.

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    • paranoid@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I need an adult

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      • mysticalone@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        i am an adult

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    • sockenklaus@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      That was my initial thought… Nice pickup line btw. Do you have more? :)

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      • percent@infosec.pub ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        These guys right here, officer

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    • LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      At my son’s kindergarten all the parents walked to pick up their kids because that’s how the school was, in a small walkable neighborhood. One dad had a fishing t-shirt on that said “Master Baiter.” Kinda similar personality as this RAM/WAR truck guy.

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    • sol6_vi@lemmy.makearmy.io ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Like the guy in the truck gives a shit about the difference.

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    • ShaggySnacks@lemmy.myserv.one ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      “Hey baby, can you show me where music class is, cause I feel like playing in A minor.”

      The Epstein and co pick up line.

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  • Jhogenbaum@leminal.space ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Hey… I’m so glad that guys kid is NOT homeschooled…

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    • RagingRobot@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Idk I bet that kid has easy access to guns maybe they should stay home

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  • justcallmelarry@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Huh? What is it good for?

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    • Tar_alcaran@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Absolutely nothing!

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      • zout@fedia.io ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Say it again!

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    • yakko@feddit.uk ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Picking up some groceries

      Good god, y’all

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    • UltraMagnus0001@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Um, money duhhh. Just sell to both sides and instigate.

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      • silasmariner@programming.dev ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Grab that cash with both hands and make a dash

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  • sirico@feddit.uk ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Scared of the outside world so it needs a scary face, sitting in a nice comfy air-conditioned cab on big pillowy tyre. How is this more manly than a bicycle?

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    • zbyte64@awful.systems ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Where I am at there’s triple digit hear warnings, so there is a logic to this. On the other I have used my bicycle to pick up my daughter under such conditions so it is possible, but then she rightfully complains about the heat.

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      • NikkiDimes@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Oh HEAT. I went through that whole thing thinking hearing and that the ambient noise levels were above 100dB…

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  • skisnow@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Lucky I’ve not encountered him, the urge to talk to him like a 5 year old would be too great.

    “What a big truck you have! And it’s so high up! I bet you have to do a big jump to get up there. And look, it says “WAR” on the front, that’s fun! Did you put that on yourself, or did you ask a man do it for you?”

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    • Im_old@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Damn now I want to see a pink one driven by a catgirl and the logo flipped to say “awr”.

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      • moseschrute@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Image

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    • rumba@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I mean, he just turned his Ram logo upside down…

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      • tlmcleod@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        And then flipped and reversed the R afterwards?

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  • ZkhqrD5o@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Conductor: Sir, this seat is only for disabled people.

    Me, an intellectual: shows this picture I drive this.

    Conductor: Sorry to have bothered you, sir.

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    • Agent641@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      If you’re driving, why are you also riding the bus?

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      • Sculptor9157@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Taps disabled sign

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      • ZkhqrD5o@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        What bus has a conductor?

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  • BetaBlake@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    His compensator is compensating

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  • greedytacothief@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I… I would not be brave enough to drive around in a “truck” like that. Like mad props for never out growing your edge lord phase.

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    • yuriRO@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I want to see the scene of him getting out of the car like a little man

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    • altphoto@lemmy.today ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      With a couple of pets already paper thin wrapped around the tires.

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  • TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    How does one like that get a kid? Like, what woman is into a guy like that, and how does it biologically work with insemination when you have a tiny micro penis like that? I bet the kid is from the milkman or something.

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    • SCmSTR@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I hear scientists have made it so two xy people can make a baby now and mpreg is gonna be real.

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      • Agent641@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Keep trying, fellas!

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    • YeahIgotskills2@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Hey! I have a tiny dick and a tiny car. Do I get a prize?

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      • TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        There’s nothing wrong with having a small penis. There are great ways to compensate, by learning other skills in the bedroom to pleasure your partners. Buying a massive truck isn’t the right way to pleasure a partner, it’s only to show how sad and insecure you are like your other testosterone junky micropenis Chad friends with their mega trucks.

        So when you say you have a small car, I’d say you’re doing just fine.

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    • TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      lots of women are into big trucks and expensive cars.

      have you ever dated? IME majority of women want a guy with an expensive car. finding a woman who doesn’t care about that stuff is difficult.

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      • Trainguyrom@reddthat.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        lots of women are into big trucks and expensive cars.

        There’s always exceptions to the rule, but the things dudes think attract women and what actually attracts women are so often two entirely different things. Most women have little interest in expensive cars, huge muscles or fancy gadgets, they’re instead interested in a man with decent hygiene who can listen and be financially stable (all things that a lifted pickup with extra-edgy stickers and whatnot communicates the opposite of)

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  • candyman337@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    (obligatory DO NOT ACTUALLY so I don’t get removed)

    Bet if you shot up this jackass’s car he’d be a lot less prepared than he fucking thinks

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    • shalafi@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      You might be, very unpleasantly, surprised. The vast majority of us who carry guns train and are well versed in the law. Remember, when you hear crazy stories on the news, they are only reported *because they are crazy."

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  • MattTheProgrammer@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    That guy must be a stepdad because no way he’s made any children with his tiny wittle wee wee stick

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    • Dorkyd68@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Unfortunately there is a type of bleach blonde Karen that finds this type of specimen irresistible

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  • LaserTurboShark69@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Just a little higher and they’ll be able to pass over the children unscathed. Problem solved

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  • limelight79@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I’ve inadvertently ridden my bicycle through a couple school zones during drop-off times - and I’m sure pick-up times would be even worse.

    Cycling around cars has an element of risk that we all know and accept. But that risk goes WAY UP in school zones at drop-off time. You’d think drivers would be looking for kids, people, etc. as they drop their precious off IN A SCHOOL ZONE. But, no.

    For example: One started to pull out in front of me - I was in the lane, riding past, and she was pulling out of the school’s driveway. I avoided her with some vigorous braking, then she had the gall to pull up at a light and tell me I should be careful.

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    • Hazmatastic@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      It’s a bunch of stressed, impatient parents who just want to grab their kid and get out, but are apathetic to everyone else trying to do the same. If all these other people weren’t here they could do this so fast, why won’t everyone get out of their way? It’s a highly concentrated dose of the “Im gonna get mine and the rest of you can fuck right off” mentality. And, like most shitty driving behaviors, it feeds into itself. It makes good drivers make bad decisions because, if they don’t, they’re not going anywhere. “No one is letting me in, so if I dont cut someone off, I’m going to be stuck here another 15 minutes” type shit. I dont know why well-built pickup and drop-off areas aren’t required for building schools past 1990, but here we are.

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    • Washedupcynic@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      When I leave my home street, (on my bicycle,) I have to make a left hand turn. This means that I don’t proceed through the intersection until it’s safe, and I turn from the middle of the lane. My bike also has blinking turn signals, because people are dumb and don’t understand hand signals for turns. I had one of my neighbors behind me honking and screaming at me because I wasn’t turning fast enough for her liking. I screamed at her that I wasn’t turning until it was safe, and she could eat my ass. Then I got off my bike in the middle of the road and proceeded to dance the running man for 30 seconds before getting back on to attempt my left hand turn again. Fuck cars and the people that drive them.

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  • ohlaph@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I bet he’d rip his Achilles as well if he tried running more than the length of his micro unit.

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  • Credibly_Human@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Kids who never grew up, but in a bad way

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  • BootLoop@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Yeah, can’t they take the school bus or just walk?

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  • DioramaOfShit@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I need some new insults to use. Everything i grew up calling these people is not okay to use anymore (fag, retard etc.) The more offensive the better. Thanks for the help.

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  • NewSocialWhoDis@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    As if he’d ever see a kid walking in front of that thing.

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  • Gammelfisch@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Only in the USA, the rest of the 1st World is normal.

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  • brucethemoose@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    At least it has a decent looking suspension, widened stance and big wheels of a prerunner. If this guy lives out in the desert, he likely has some fantastic fun with it.

    What I don’t particularly like are the lifts that are terrible off road, like feet off the ground to the point where they’re tippy, yet have no travel

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  • waitaminute@midwest.social ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I feel like I saw this truck on long island. Same truck?

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  • DarkCloud@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Boyght from OAN’s shopping channel.

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  • Tracaine@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Why is everyone making fun of some guy’s truck? Further, OP why are you being a creeper and posting pictures of people online without their consent?

    I guarantee no one here knows this man, he might be the nicest dude ever and just happens to like monster trucks or something. What the hell is wrong with you people? How about mind your own business instead of gossiping about someone who is (probably) just a random dad waiting to pick up his kid and go home to make dinner. Fucking weirdos.

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  • Sterile_Technique@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Some semi-matte olive paint and that mofo could have a Warthog.

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  • NGC2346@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I’ll play devils advocate here, but in a free society, cant people ride the vehicule they want as long as it’s legal ? Although his truck is ridiculously large, it’s not like the majority of people drive those.

    I just feel like there’s way worse in life than Johns enlarged Dodge Ram.

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  • panda_abyss@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Is that Snake driving that truck? I see the eye patch.

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  • UnfortunateShort@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I mean, it does look kind of cool. Can’t go wrong with matte black

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