You know this bed is great and all, but what it’s really missing is a mandatory connection to the Internet!
…jfc
AWS crash causes $2,000 Smart Beds to overheat and get stuck upright
Submitted 1 day ago by cm0002@lemmings.world to technology@lemmy.zip
Comments
Asafum@feddit.nl 1 day ago
Gullible@sh.itjust.works 1 day ago
“Carla! Carla! What the fuck is this? I know you sleep on a 25. A 25 or a 30 if you fuck up swiping. I know for a fucking fact that you would NEVER choose to sleep on a 60, and yet I found a goddamn record of a 60 when I was out last week. Who was it? Who was here?”
I really can’t see any other reason. A dial isn’t sexy but it’s far easier in every way
Formfiller@lemmy.world 3 hours ago
Never buying smart anything
DaddleDew@lemmy.world 1 day ago
People in the 80’s: “In the year 2025 we’re going to have hoverboards and flying cars!”
2025: “I can’t use my bed because the servers are down”
Never buy anything that needs to be connected to a server to work for no good reason.
undefinedTruth@lemmy.zip 1 day ago
Smart products themselves are not the issue. The issue is making everything cloud based. The solution is companies designing their products so they can be controlled over the network.
It’s a fucking bed! It doesn’t need a persistent connection to some server. The problem is that they also want to mine and sell your data.
MrTolkinghoen@lemmy.zip 1 day ago
That’s the key. They want to mine and sell the data
merc@sh.itjust.works 9 hours ago
Smart products are part of the issue, and smart products that fail in dumb ways are a really big part of the issue.
Any smart product, pretty much by definition, has to have a computer in it. Anything with a computer in it can be hacked. There’s really no good reason that your bed should have an attack surface.
If you are going to have smarts in something, it really needs to fail well. Like, for a bed, it should have something that bypasses the smarts and lets it go back to “dumb bed” mode no matter what. No matter what position it’s in, it should be possible to make it go flat even if you have no Internet connection. In fact, even if the smart parts are not working at all, there should be a way to make it go flat, even if that’s a purely mechanical system that allows you to bypass the motors.
SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 1 day ago
Smart products are named oxymoronically.
Albbi@lemmy.ca 1 day ago
Also people in the 80’s: “I love my waterbed, but my back is killing me for some reason.”
betanumerus@lemmy.ca 8 hours ago
It’s amazing that they actually designed the beds to fail in the worse possible way. I mean this is cartoon crazy.
misteloct@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 hours ago
Close your eyes, take a moment and just imagine the engineering culture at Eight Sleep. I’d rather be homeless than work there.
M0oP0o@mander.xyz 7 hours ago
MrsDoyle@sh.itjust.works 42 minutes ago
He also invented CFCs, the chemical that nearly destroyed the earth’s protective ozone layer. Quite a guy.
Wahots@pawb.social 13 minutes ago
A one man environmental disaster. J. R. McNeill opined that Midgley “had more adverse impact on the atmosphere than any other single organism in Earth’s history”
Horse@lemmygrad.ml 7 hours ago
also CFCs!
he was a one-man ecological disasterM0oP0o@mander.xyz 7 hours ago
His best invention was the bed that killed him! If only those who designed the “smart” beds that need functioning network access (and working AWS) had all been in one.
Fenrisulfir@lemmy.ca 9 hours ago
So instead of it defaulting to last known good settings, it couldn’t poll AWS to retrieve the user settings and either just went into debug alert mode or the hardcoded defaults are full upright and max temp. More premium products kneecapped by poor management in a race to enshittify everything
Sculptor9157@sh.itjust.works 7 hours ago
$2000 is very mid for a bed.
LordKitsuna@lemmy.world 37 minutes ago
The heck are you talking about. My tuft and needle mint WITH the added cost of extra pillows and a sheet set wasn’t even a full $2000 it’s one of the best mattresses I’ve ever seen in my life I’ve had it for like 5 years now and there’s still zero indication of any type of settling or imprinting on the foam, it’s the perfect mix of firm supportive but comfortable and shape fitting. And every time I’ve seen a bed more expensive than that it’s felt terrible and basically just been about buying the brand name or some stupid exotic material it’s made of
Microtonal_Banana@lemmy.zip 4 hours ago
No it is not.
Fenrisulfir@lemmy.ca 4 hours ago
I paid $700 CAD for my king size. You bougie
SpiceDealer@lemmy.dbzer0.com 13 hours ago
A reminder to not buy “smart” home appliances unless you can self-host it’s internet connectivity or its “smart” features are optional.
ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 12 hours ago
You had me until “unless”.
Cabbage_Pout61@lemmy.world 8 hours ago
smart home appliances are tolerable if they have 0 (zero, cero, null, ling, sifr, mee-then, noll) internet access
matlag@sh.itjust.works 1 day ago
Reminds me that nurse interview in Spain during the blackout:
“But your hospital doesn’t have a backup generator?? -Oh we have solar panels, we could be running off the grid! But the power management system requires an Internet connection, and it’s down!”
merc@sh.itjust.works 9 hours ago
The nurse knew that the power management system required an Internet connection? That’s one geeky nurse.
Still, I have hope with things like solar panels. I think these are likely to be teething pains there. Being off-grid on a solar panel is probably a pretty common situation, so they’re probably going to eventually work out the kinks. As long as there isn’t a monopoly on power management systems, or regulatory capture by the companies that make them, probably the ability to work disconnected from both the power and Internet grids will eventually happen. But, with Internet-of-Things stuff, there’s often a commercial incentive to mine people’s data and lock them into a subscription service model. So, that’s really going to require regulation to fix.
aeternum@lemmy.blahaj.zone 19 hours ago
I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. But why does a bed need to be smart? This is the dumbest timeline ever. It really is
Best_Jeanist@discuss.online 14 hours ago
To help people with paralysis shimmy into their wheelchairs in the morning and to keep the elderly in poorly insulated homes from freezing in the night.
cactusupyourbutt@lemmy.world 12 hours ago
okay sounds good. why the cloud thou
Redex68@lemmy.world 13 hours ago
From what I’ve seen, it’s actually a really good product. Just that the company is trash and forces subscriptions and the mattresses to be always online.
prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 hours ago
How can that possibly be a good product?
webp@mander.xyz 10 hours ago
forces the mattresses to be always online
Bahahahaha!
AppleTea@lemmy.zip 22 hours ago
I feel like if I was gonna put a computer attached to a motor & heater inside a bed, the very first step would be making sure that if the software goes wrong, it always defaults to staying bed shaped and not catching fire.
I know I know hindsight is 20/20, I’m sure I’m just missing something. Venture capitalists would just give their money to any random idiot with a pitch, right?
Wahots@pawb.social 7 minutes ago
Reminds me of the Naked Gun folding bed scene, haha
rafoix@lemmy.zip 1 day ago
lol, e-waste beds.
CompactFlax@discuss.tchncs.de 1 day ago
I’ve heard these beds are actually quite effective at helping you sleep and then wake up more naturally.
But they have wrapped entirely local events (it’s all just timers, folks) behind a cloud-exclusive subscription and the product is useless on a sunny day like we had yesterday.
They’re enormously expensive and the subscription serves no useful purpose other than to line the pockets of the investors.
I have a strict rule of no cloud dependency in my house. Otherwise, I’d be interested - if the price was remotely reasonable.
HejMedDig@feddit.dk 1 day ago
You can get other versions than eight sleep. I had an insert for my pillow. Can’t remember the brand though. It ran locally via an app and Bluetooth. I ended up returning within the trial period, due to it forming bubbles in the circulation, which woke me up
floofloof@lemmy.ca 1 day ago
I just hammer my brain with melatonin on top of alcohol and extreme fatigue. It’s nature’s solution.
tyler@programming.dev 1 day ago
You can flash your own firmware if you want.
partial_accumen@lemmy.world 1 day ago
rozodru@pie.andmc.ca 1 day ago
“sorry honey just a bit longer, I’m in the process of flashing the bed, we can go to bed soon…god damn sig faults!”
CompactFlax@discuss.tchncs.de 1 day ago
I wonder how it compares in functionality - to be clear, there’s no functionality I’m aware of that would require cloud (perhaps historical data).
Still, they’re wildly expensive.
grahamja@reddthat.com 23 hours ago
That sounds wonderful, to have an air gapped smart bed on open source software. Just like having the perfect nuclear missile launch system on Windows XP made by clever engineers. No updates, just dreams.
StrawberryPigtails@lemmy.sdf.org 1 day ago
So, what would be the community that is the opposite of buy it for life?
Seriously, I get that internet is ubiquitous in some areas, but everything should have the ability to function correctly without internet access.
HootinNHollerin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 day ago
ElectroLisa@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 day ago
there was also one called “internetofshit” but forgot on which instance
hperrin@lemmy.ca 1 day ago
Not that it isn’t wildly ridiculous and stupid to have an internet connected bed, but couldn’t you just unplug it if it’s overheating?
matlag@sh.itjust.works 1 day ago
That’s what customer support would have told the poor clueless customers if the hotline had not been an AI agent running on AWS!
mikedd@lemmy.world 23 hours ago
Damn, that’s bleak…
CameronDev@programming.dev 1 day ago
Dont blame the victim, those poor people couldn’t sleep, as if they could critically think /s
knatschus@discuss.tchncs.de 12 hours ago
They would have to know it does that first
Pulptastic@midwest.social 1 day ago
But then it’s not a smart beer, is it Todd?
Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works 20 hours ago
What a stupid fucking product.
Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works 19 hours ago
Sorry, I meant to say “stupid fucking people buying stupid fucking products.”
LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 19 hours ago
Beds are often used for fucking. Beds are fucking products.
fodor@lemmy.zip 16 hours ago
Right, and we should protect them by passing laws penalizing companies from such shitty software. Cuz the average person can’t access the source code.
TankovayaDiviziya@lemmy.world 1 day ago
I am more shocked that there are people who are interested in “smart” furnitures and appliance.
4am@lemmy.zip 1 day ago
Smart devices are fine - it usually just means remote control or status. Plenty of use in that.
The problem is that no one can be arsed to buy a local hub and figure out how to connect it, so every company just builds an app and makes it cloud connected. That way they can farm your stupidity.
It’s not hard to make a device that works locally (it’s way easier than making a cloud service) but it’s far less lucrative.
That being said if I bought a $2000 mattress cover and it didn’t work offline I’d have gotten my fucking money back.
merc@sh.itjust.works 8 hours ago
I can completely understand it, if you ignore all the privacy issues and potential hacks.
For example, a smart fridge. Imagine a fridge that tracks the expiry date of everything inside and warns you before something goes bad – or detects when something goes bad based on the off-gassing that it produces. Imagine it gets to know your purchase patterns and suggests items for your grocery list when you’re running low. Or, if you fully trust it, it could even order those things for you.
Or, smart lights. Imagine lights that are nice and bright in the winter when you don’t get enough sunlight. Then imagine those lights are smart enough to start dimming and getting “warmer” at a certain point in the evening on your personal schedule, making your body more prepared for sleep. Add motion / presence sensors so that the lights turn on when you go into a room, and turn off when everybody leaves the room. Most of the time a light switch isn’t a burden, but if you’re carrying things it can be a bit annoying, and we all know kids are pretty bad about turning things off when they leave a room.
In a world where you didn’t have to worry about the privacy issues, the bugs had all been worked out, and so-on, smart appliances could be great. But, we’re on v0.1 and so I’m extremely cautious in every “smart” device I use.
BroBot9000@lemmy.world 1 day ago
SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 1 day ago
How about a Kohler toilet that watches you poop for an annual subscription.
merc@sh.itjust.works 9 hours ago
“Smart” toilets are a privacy nightmare.
Having said that, in the distant future, if we don’t drown the world, or kill ourselves in some other way, smart toilets are actually a smart idea.
Look how often a medical check-up requires either a stool sample or a urine sample. It makes sense. It’s the waste products our body produces, so there’s going to be a lot of data there. Now, imagine if you could get a basic medical check-up every time you used the toilet. You could catch so many problems early. It would be an entirely non-invasive medical check-up and if done right you wouldn’t even need to change your routine. You’d just use the toilet as normal and if the toilet detected anything that required a more detailed check, it could give you a packet of data you could give to your doctor.
At the very least, imagine if instead of trying to pee into a cup at the doctor’s office – or worse, trying to collect a stool sample, you could just use the “Medical Toilet” the way you use any other toilet and it would collect the sample for you.
But, of course, the wealth of medical information it could provide is exactly why it would be a privacy nightmare in the current world. I don’t know why Kohler is jumping into this now. Even if they see it as some way to generate revenue, they have to know it’s going to generate lawsuits too, and when inevitably there’s a privacy breach it’s going to put their good name in the toilet.
quick_snail@feddit.nl 1 day ago
Probably people with “help, my possessed bed folded me inside it, and now I’m trapped” fetishes
Marshezezz@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 day ago
Look at how much capitalism creates progress and drives us as a species to better ourselves. Next step, how to make money off people breathing air and sell them a subscription for it so they can continue to consume
MelodiousFunk@slrpnk.net 1 day ago
ngdev@lemmy.zip 1 day ago
thats easy, pollute the air so much that you have to buy consumable gas mask filters to breathe
Marshezezz@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 day ago
Exactly what I was thinking. Petroleum companies have been working on it for years I’m sure
muffedtrims@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Nestle enters the chat
possiblylinux127@lemmy.zip 1 day ago
“Water isn’t a human right”
matlag@sh.itjust.works 1 day ago
Then tens of thousands or millions would die when a server goes down, but “shit happens” and there was a small line in the EULA where the provider deny all responsability if anythind bad happens from a service failure.
Thoughts and prayers, though!
Did you know that with our Super+ package, you get redundant servers switching automatically to the next working one?
undefinedTruth@lemmy.zip 1 day ago
There is special category for Internet of Shit devices, that not only are cloud based but also require a persistent connection to a server to even execute basic functions.
kamen@lemmy.world 7 hours ago
Online first, and they’re only now working on offline mode? Okay…
answersplease77@lemmy.world 7 hours ago
this is worse than getting locked out of your smart oven for not paying subsceiption
DancingBear@midwest.social 1 day ago
This is completely ridiculous. Why would you buy a bed that goes upright? Through the internet?
BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works 1 day ago
Because, and this may surprise you, some (most?) people don’t think about how their stuff works. They just see it has an app and goes “neat!”.
I don’t know why my dishwasher should be online. But I’ve been with people who’s smart watches twinkled to alert them that their dishwasher, located 30min away, was out of rinse aid. I no scenario is that relevant. Rant warning There’s a God damn light on the front of the unit, that tells you the same damn thing, and you can’t do anything about without being at the unit. What are you going to do? Drop whatever you’re doing at work and take an hour lunch break early to drive home and deal with it? Didn’t think so.
BUT the person had seen the dishwasher and thought it was neat, modern, and needed a new dishwasher. And that’s whywe end up with a lot of “smart” devices, which are just “ordinary devices with an cloud based remote control”
DancingBear@midwest.social 1 day ago
Nah bruh, if my dishwasher ever sends me a text message, I am taking the rest of the day off just because, and my boss would understand
Buckshot@programming.dev 22 hours ago
Bought a new dryer recently and ended paying more for one that didn’t have internet connectivity. It’s entire operation requires physical presence, why would i need ever need remote access. It’s just something else to go wrong.
slaacaa@lemmy.world 21 hours ago
Same people who are dropping their jaw when their car has a big-ass tablet in the middle of the dashboard instead of physical buttons.
You have to find the controls for windshield wiper’s speed 3 submenus deep, but it looks so modern and cool!
Jarix@lemmy.world 23 hours ago
Or maybe just go and get some more rinse aid in the way home… You don’t need to jump to rediculous conclusions.
SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 day ago
I have awful acid reflux and have an adjustable bed frame. Having the top half slightly raised is a life saver since I can raise it for worse reflux and lower it for better sleep. I just use a remote, though. Doing it on an app through the internet is just stupid.
quick_snail@feddit.nl 1 day ago
Of course someone made a bed whose controls require an API with internet access…
CCMan1701A@startrek.website 1 day ago
Waiting for the reports that cars couldn’t be used because of the aws issue
gerowen@lemmy.world 23 hours ago
People who buy an internet connected bed have more dollars than sense.
ImgurRefugee114@reddthat.com 20 hours ago
Dumbest fucking timeline
mikedd@lemmy.world 23 hours ago
What’s wrong with just a regular mattress? Why does it have to be connected to the internet? :(
boonhet@sopuli.xyz 20 hours ago
It adjusts temperature (can heat OR cool and in some versions it can heat one side and cool the other) and I think the even more expensive version can morph a bit to your liking, and according to them, reduce snoring.
What they don’t mention is that regardless of whether you get the 3600 euro option or the 5800 euro option, you still have to SUPPLY YOUR OWN MATTRESS. It’s also a subscription service.
If you didn’t hate it enough, it’s also advertised as being “powered by AI”. Which almost certainly is just some temperature adjustment algorithm, maybe even a deterministic one.
prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 hours ago
It adjusts temperature (can heat OR cool and in some versions it can heat one side and cool the other) and I think the even more expensive version can morph a bit to your liking, and according to them, reduce snoring.
You don’t need the internet to do those things thoug
whoisearth@lemmy.ca 16 hours ago
Here I am like a preb using a hot water bottle when cold and less bedsheets when hot. If only I knew there was a technical solution for a problem that’s already been solved hundreds of times over!
HugeNerd@lemmy.ca 39 minutes ago
People. You don’t need this shit. I promise.