Submitted 10 hours ago by ickplant@lemmy.world to [deleted]
https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/50ae3dc5-7788-4dac-9d81-abc12d77c9c1.jpeg
White text on black background that reads “if you do these for 30 days you will be unrecognizable * sleep 8+ hours * drink 2L minimum of water a day (high pH if possible) * get sun daily * no sugar * read for 30 mins a day * workout 3x / week * capture someone and cut their face off and sew it onto your face * meditate for 10 mins daily
I knew there was something I wasn’t doing
Yeah I should also start meditating
The unrecognizable will already come with “2L water (high pH if possible)”. Just go for “water” with pH 14. Two liters a day will make you unrecognizable.
I can also recommend to drink with the highest pH possible. I mean, pH 14 is only double the amount of pH 7, right guys?
So drinking 1L of pH 14 water is the same as 2L of pH 7. Efficiency
I tried drinking a lot every day but noticed no difference except needing to go to toilet like 5 times per day and watch my pee come out almost without any yellow color at all.
ok imma drink 2L of bleach
You will become unrecognizable.
Ok, so read more, workout less and saw stranger’s face onto my own. Got it.
Ok, but how many times per week should I get a new skin-mask? I find that if I try more than twice per week, maintaining the prison pit will start to be a real chore.
ADHD brain made me skip the most important line: take your meds people
How high are PH we talking here?
14.1 would be ideal.
Just all the hydroxides. No positivity allowed
Sounds unpleasant
So where does work to live fit into this?
Step 1: be born into generational wealth
All the things on the list are free. Just don’t waste time watching TV/playing video games and don’t have kids.
I have this weird feeling that all this does is make you recognizable as someone else.
This hits peak wholesome until the last bullet where it morphs into a Leatherface audition. Do the sleep, water, sun, reading and workouts and you will honestly feel and look different, no face-harvesting required. Also “high pH water” is woo, drink clean water and move on.
No sugar rule is fine in spirit, but I will die on the hill of one good cookie. If you want to be truly unrecognizable, try a brutal haircut and a new wardrobe first. If that fails, maybe skip town, not surgery by proxy.
I did do it at one point, but the reading was more like 3-5 hours a day, and hardcore dark romance smut.
My girlfriend broke up with me because "she couldn't recognise me in bed". In hindsight, making her ride the handle of a knife might've been a smidge too far.
Really depends on the girl. I knew a girl once who wanted the grip of my gun in her. Well she wanted the other end but I believe in always treating a gun like it’s loaded. So we settled on the grip.
Whatever you are into their is someone out there into it too.
That girl is a teacher now.
I do not know how meditating 10 min/day morphs into a Leatherface audition, but I’m hitting up my zafu right now!
I might try this.
911 please send help
If it works for you, great. But ph water is bullshit , outside of a few specific uses.
There's only one on there that I simply can't do.
I can't stand the sun for long.
At least your face wouldn’t burn
No sugar? I’m good…
How strict is that no sugar thing?
Not strict at all. Sugar is harmless unless you are a diabetic, or eating excess calories
It’s your road to growth. If you can do it all except the sugar you are still doing better than you were before.
You can always tackle the sugar problem down the road when you’re ready to.
awful_neutral@lemmy.blahaj.zone 9 minutes ago
You lost me at meditate
Boring as fuck