choice

Comments

• Ravi@feddit.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Green pill = infinite money cheat. Turn all the plastic trash, nuclear waste etc. into bio mass

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  • MrMcGasion@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    You could go the evil route and become a hitman as well, or rather a shitman, turning your targets into poo.

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    • LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Just need to keep your talent a secret. Put on your mask, grab a shovel, turn all the walls between you and the bank vault to shit, take what you need and leave. Cops come, the bullets/guns/cuffs police left feet to poo. Wash the money figuratively once done cleaning it literally, then figure out your next step.

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    • Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I have a few people in mind. Nobody I know personally, though.

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    • frog@feddit.uk ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Imagine Death Note replaced with this power instead.

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    • KSPAtlas@sopuli.xyz ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      targets dropping dead as I turn their brains to poo

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    • atopi@piefed.blahaj.zone ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      It says you can transform anything, which would imply it has no range. You could do that without leaving your house

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  • ivanafterall@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Unfortunately, it’s imprecise and now the ocean is literally just shit.

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  • hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Also gardeners and farmers would very much want poo. So first you get a deal where someone pays you to turn trash or such into poo, then when the poo dries up, sell it as fertillizer.

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• CoffeeJunkie@lemmy.cafe ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Green pill would be the best power, hands down, no contest. It would be a very, well, green superpower.

  Demolition jobs all around the country, regular houses cost $4-8 per square foot. Underbid & you get every job. Old warehouses? Poo. Toxic landfills? Poo. Asbestos? Poo. Old tech waste that’s processed for valuable metals first? Poo. Forever chemicals? Not anymore, poo. Radioactive nuclear waste that costs us $6B every year according to this? Get a government contract for $5B per year for 100+ years with unlimited paid travel/room/board for you & all your family, travel to all the storage sites & turn all the nuclear waste into poo. Travel the US. Travel the world! You’re the Poo Man. Eliminating radioactive nuclear waste & creating fertilizer. Everyone would pay top dollar for your fantastic services. Getting old, sick of earth? Go to the moon, go to Mars, Mars can use lots & lots of nutrient rich poo to help terraform in the future.

  There would be almost no limit to the amount of good you could do, with poo…yes, you can use it to rob banks. If you’re fucking dumb. Or you could legally shake down & radically transform the entire world, make them pay you & your descendants like kings, and if they’re smart they’ll thank you for your services. Poo Man. All day, every day, you’d be the richest man on earth (or Mars) & arguably super super ethical, too. Win-win.

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  • JusticeForPorygon@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    You show up at the capitol to turn Congress into poo.

    It doesn’t work, because they’re already full of shit.

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  • iAvicenna@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Netanyahu? instant poo. Trump, Putin? Instant poo. Turn shitty humans to shit and cut the middle man.

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    • CarbonIceDragon@pawb.social ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Technically any human was already capable of doing that, the pill doesn’t say that it’s necessarily something you can just instantly do at a distance with your mind.

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  • blarghly@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I was thinking blue, since you could sell the thorium. But no, you’re making a solid case here…

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    • qupada@fedia.io ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      If their case is too solid, try eating more fibre.

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  • programmer_belch@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    That’s pretty cool until CIA or another government intelligence kidnaps you to keep you inside a box converting everything you touch into poop, giving them an advantage against other countries

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    • wdx@feddit.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      turn the kidnappers into poo

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    • CoffeeJunkie@lemmy.cafe ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Turn the box into poop! Turn all kidnappers to poop!

      That’s a good point. Idk you would probably have to have a robust security detail. Which you can afford, or probably again twist the arm of America to provide for you at taxpayer expense. 🙂 All things are negotiable.

      You can do so much good with that power, you’d be one of the best people to exist ever in the history of mankind. You’d simply have to use that power. For good.

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  • Aqarius@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I wonder if transforming all the microplastics that are everywhere would improve or worsen everyone’s health.

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    • Predalien@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Boom, miniscule amounts of poo in your bloodstream

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    • CoffeeJunkie@lemmy.cafe ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Probably improve. Not immediately, and don’t go shoveling it into your mouth, but enough of the poop would have to be treated via simple exposure or a sewage plant.

      City people tend to not really understand poop, waste management…give poop enough time, and a little care, it’s fertilizer. Where I live, some of the soils are very very black. Very rich & fertile. It’s the best soil. But what created that rich soil?

      It was poop. Poop, pee, rotting biological lifeforms. It was poop, it no longer is poop, I bought this book a year & a half ago that details how to safely turn your own poop into sterile soil. There are many different methods, web search it.

      I enjoy the benefits of society & modern plumbing, septic…but if/when everything breaks down…I want a good outhouse. I don’t want to be sitting around like an idiot wondering, “Where does my poo-poo go without 1.4 gallons of water per flush? 🤔”

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    • Nalivai@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      That depends on what exactly is the poo. If it’s a poo of a living creature, it will be very not good, it’s riddled with microorganisms, viruses, and bacteria that you really really don’t want in your bloodstream. If it’s an abstract idealistic version of poo than it might be better.

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  • hedge_lord@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I can turn a lot of things to poo already tho, I just have to eat them first and wait a while

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    • sausager@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Do trump next please

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  • SSUPII@sopuli.xyz ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    We already have lemmy.ca/post/865320

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• Kolanaki@pawb.social ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  You literally already have the power of the green pill. Don’t take that one.

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  • CIA_chatbot@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I have this power - I turned the entire Republican Party into shit and everything got WAY worse

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  • abbadon420@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I’d love to see you turn cyanide into poo. Better act fast!

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    • SSUPII@sopuli.xyz ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Eat a bunch of apple seeds

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    • yetAnotherUser@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      As long as the rate of cyanide is low enough, you can do it no problem.

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  • Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    But some of that stuff isn’t very pleasant to eat.

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• Formfiller@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  I think I would take turn anything into poo. Trump, Netanyahu, Putin and every billionaire would be instantly poo

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  • daggermoon@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Can you add Kid Rock to your turn to poo list please?

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    • Formfiller@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Done

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  • Rolive@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Nothing changes.

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  • steve@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    They’re already pretty shitty

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    • Formfiller@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      So it’s a fitting end

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  • Gradually_Adjusting@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Then the Copromancer saved the world and never went on a vindictive pooing spree driven mad by his own unstoppable power, The End

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    • Formfiller@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Well I mean to be fair there’s a few vindictive pooing spree people in my own life but really just a few. I was driven mad years ago so not to worry that ship has sailed

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  • lightnsfw@reddthat.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Start with just the roof of their mouths.

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  • hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    For more petty cases, turn people’s stuff or food into poo.

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• python@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Black pill’s gonna have some mysterious side effects with my other medication Image

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• Steamymoomilk@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  When we say lifetime supply of thorium. Does it mean the receivers lifetime Or the thorium’s lifetime???

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  • AreaKode@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Is it lifetime or halflifetime?

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    • somerandomperson@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Half-life (thorium in the bg instead of…uhh…idk who the main character is)

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• Derpenheim@lemmy.zip ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Im taking the black pill every time. I got a lot of retard to undo

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  • EldenLord@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    You have become Derpenheimer, destroyer of retards

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• Jean_le_Flambeur@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  I take green and Start with all weapons on earth.

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  • yermaw@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    All the new recruits in the army, literally polishing a turd, because theyre scared of the sergeant and dont know if this is a hazing thing or what

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• Mac@mander.xyz ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Black pill. Please cure me of my ailments.

  I would be un-fucking-stoppable as a normie.

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• pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Neurotypical pill pls

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• balderdash9@lemmy.zip ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Turn anything into poo: turn plastic waste into manure/fertilizer. Millionaire pretty quick.

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• interdimensionalmeme@lemmy.ml ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  I would turn every star to poo

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  • frightful_hobgoblin@lemmy.ml ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    enough poo = black hole

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• cabron_offsets@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Green mang. Turn orange into brown nahmean?

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• Geodad@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Absolutely green. So many people would turn to shit that the remaining minority would ask if this was the rapture.

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  • MiDaBa@lemmy.ml ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    We’d call it getting green pilled

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• lena@gregtech.eu ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Green, I’d turn trump into poo

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• Aggravationstation@feddit.uk ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  How much thorium does the average person use in one lifetime?

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  • filcuk@lemmy.zip ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Somewhat unfunny answer: a 3cm diameter ball of thorium, that easily fits into one’s palm by size, should be enough to provide all power an individual uses in a lifetime.
    This can change a lot based on usage and actual power generation efficiency.

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    • Aggravationstation@feddit.uk ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Well, now I know what I’m buying everyone for Christmas

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• Una@europe.pub ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  blue :3

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• GreenKnight23@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  blue all the way

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  • Etterra@discuss.online ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    So what, like 10 grams?

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    • GreenKnight23@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      depends on how much cancer has already metastasized in my body already I suppose.

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• joyjoy@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Too complex. I somehow mixed 2 of them and lemm.ee died

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• rustyfish@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  The black one. You know what? I take two, just to be sure.

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• Aeri@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Black and blue. I could stand to be less stupid and also thorium is very useful to power generation I could probably sell it.

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• InnerScientist@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  I’ll take two unretard.

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• EldenLord@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  I need that unretard for sure!

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• Etterra@discuss.online ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Green. What’s the range?

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  • ICastFist@programming.dev ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Your colon

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• Angelusz@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Orange and Purple for sure.

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• individual@toast.ooo ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  I don’t understand the orange pill so I must need the black pill

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• Winter_Oven@piefed.social ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  What...will be the consistency? The answer will impact the uses I would have for the green pill.

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• ieatpwns@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Orange and black

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• BigBenis@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Clarification for green. Does it require physical contact or is it like a Death Note situation? If it’s the former, don’t we already have that ability? What about non-bio-based materials? If you eat a rock and poop out a rock, does it also now qualify as poo?

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• harfang@slrpnk.net ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Yellow yellow yellow !

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