First they came for the spring rolls…
PSA
Submitted 2 months ago by ObviouslyNotBanana@piefed.world to [deleted]
https://media.piefed.world/posts/hs/lG/hslGT8V8pVtPeTs.jpeg
Comments
Void@lemmings.world 2 months ago
ieatpwns@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Then I came for the spring rolls
Una@europe.pub 2 months ago
Actually, they first came for anal beads, chess scandal :3
dditty@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 months ago
They also came for frozen potatoes
LillyPip@lemmy.ca 2 months ago
You’re saying I should make anal beads from spring rolls?
Way ahead of you.
Evil_Shrubbery@thelemmy.club 2 months ago
And I said “Hey, I was stuffing those up my ass!! Get your own!”
lugal@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 months ago
And I stayed silent because I wasn’t a spring roll
First_Thunder@lemmy.zip 2 months ago
Literally 1984
anotherspinelessdem@lemmy.ml 2 months ago
Yes that’s how many I’ve gotten up there (lifetime, of course. I’m not a freak).
Kolanaki@pawb.social 2 months ago
Why? Why shouldn’t I put a spring roll up me bum?
gibmiser@lemmy.world 2 months ago
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 2 months ago
davidagain@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Funniest meme of the day.
Typhoon@lemmy.ca 2 months ago
Because it offends everyone else at the Chinese buffet.
simplejack@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Because it means you have to poop out your mouth.
outhouseperilous@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 months ago
No i have an eating disorder.
Gork@sopuli.xyz 2 months ago
You need spring rolls with flared bases for that.
Grostleton@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 months ago
barnaclebutt@lemmy.world 2 months ago
don@lemmy.ca 2 months ago
My spring rolls, my choice.
Evil_Shrubbery@thelemmy.club 2 months ago
Why so strict? Let loose a little, give the choice to put juicy Asian rolls up you butt to someone else …
don@lemmy.ca 2 months ago
💢**MY FUCKING SPRING ROLLS, MY FUCKING CHOICE, GODDAMMIT!**💢
(Much amgery stomping noises ~fading off into the distance~)
[DOOR SLAMS VIOLENTLY, KNOCKING SEVERAL DECORATIVE DISHES FROM THEIR DISPLAY STANDS. END OF SCENE.]
Derpenheim@lemmy.zip 2 months ago
Fuckin Big Pharma, at it again
Hupf@feddit.org 2 months ago
Forbidden suppository
hardcoreufo@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Too late, please advise.
WanderWisley@lemmy.world 2 months ago
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 2 months ago
dreadbeef@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 month ago
mmm i need lumpia
PeriodicallyPedantic@lemmy.ca 2 months ago
Lest I checked, this was a free country
Venus_Ziegenfalle@feddit.org 2 months ago
Patients are warning doctors to mind their own business
SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 months ago
MudMan@fedia.io 2 months ago
I mean... I'm trying to be snarky, but I'm finding it hard ot argue that it's bad advice.
Evil_Shrubbery@thelemmy.club 2 months ago
Other people in the restaurant?
Me asking the delivery person to “feed” them to me?
One to many springs in my bum?
scytale@piefed.zip 2 months ago
Only thing I can think of is a deep fried spring roll can be pretty sharp at the edges and can tear the delicate skin there.
Bucky@okaythen.lol 2 months ago
Are egg rolls still fair game though?
outhouseperilous@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 months ago
Why wouldn’t they be?
0ops@piefed.zip 2 months ago
Good to know, I was sitting on the fence about this. Funny enough, the doctor said I shouldn't be boofing fenceposts either, but I'll wait until there's a consensus on that, I think.
Fuckfuckmyfuckingass@lemmy.world 2 months ago
DON’T TELL ME WHAT TO DO SCIENCE MAN.
davidagain@lemmy.world 2 months ago
The only thing you should put in your anus is your elbow.
No, wait, that’s ears.
The only thing you should put in your anus is your ear.
No, no, that’s still not right.
The only think you should put in your anus is something with a flared base.*
*If you’re worrying about whether your boyfriend’s penis has a flared base and you can’t find a tape measure, recall that most penises are not readily detachable, and most boyfriends have hips wider than their penis, so you’re in the clear.
If you’re worried that this advice doesn’t apply simply because you don’t have a boyfriend, there’s an app for that.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 2 months ago
i thought it was that the only thing you should put in your ear was your anus so you could hear the brass section
Lemmyoutofhere@lemmy.ca 2 months ago
What about egg rolls?
burntbacon@discuss.tchncs.de 2 months ago
Well how else are men supposed to get pregnant? Gotta have an egg to get fertilized.
FosterMolasses@leminal.space 2 months ago
With a pic of the perfect girth of spring rolls lmao
(Also 69th comment 🤙)
TriangleSpecialist@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Health and safety gone mad
hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 months ago
I can do whatever I want >:(
FartsWithAnAccent@fedia.io 2 months ago
Where else am I supposed to store them?
Ceruleum@lemmy.wtf 1 month ago
Somebody else’s buthole,
Imhotep@lemmy.world 2 months ago
I’m a bit upset people would do that with such good food.
dumbass@leminal.space 2 months ago
Can’t have any fucking fun anymore, what’s next, I’m not allowed to shove croissants up my anus?
BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 2 months ago
About 10 years ago, I went out at the beginning of the summer to buy a few fresh pool noodles, and couldn’t find them anywhere. It was that way all summer.
The next summer, they were everywhere, but now they all had a tag or sticker attached, saying “Do not insert in rectum.”
So there were no pool noodles for an entire summer, because some guy saw one, and couldn’t resist the compulsion to stick it up his ass.
plyth@feddit.org 2 months ago
Worse, he sued and was rewarded some form of compensation because some judge agreed that it is not obvious that pool noodles shouldn’t stuck up an ass.
ryedaft@sh.itjust.works 2 months ago
Honestly, what right-thinking, red-blooded man doesn’t look at a pool noodle and go “You know what?”
TempermentalAnomaly@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Sellouts.
MAHA says veggies are important.
Ypsilenna@lemmy.zip 2 months ago
Awww, puts them back in the fridge
Ceruleum@lemmy.wtf 1 month ago
Hmmmm, leftovers!
Una@europe.pub 2 months ago
Can I put anal beads during chess tournament?
Evil_Shrubbery@thelemmy.club 2 months ago
Only allowed now if the other end is in your opponent.
HikingVet@lemmy.ca 2 months ago
AI or Stupid humans?
TrueStoryBob@lemmy.world 2 months ago
You’re not my real dad, DON’T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!!!
baggins@lemmy.ca 2 months ago
What is the charge?! Enjoying a meal? A succulent Chinese meal?
dditty@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 months ago
buycurious@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Get your hands off my
penisanus!ebolapie@lemmy.world 1 month ago
No, see, uh, boofing just means getting really drunk. Please let me be on the Supreme Court. I didn’t put alcohol up my ass.
stupidcasey@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Sir, sir! mastication before masterbation.
httperror418@lemmy.world 1 month ago
This is democracy manifest!