Its the 12th century and you’ve had no time to prepare, after you’re done reading this post you are snapped. What do you do?
I’d use my knowledge of the future to do two chicks at same time
Submitted 5 weeks ago by Kookie215@lemmy.world to nostupidquestions@lemmy.world
Its the 12th century and you’ve had no time to prepare, after you’re done reading this post you are snapped. What do you do?
I’d use my knowledge of the future to do two chicks at same time
Fucking A
… and B too
“I figure a guy that can time travel 650 years into the past can set something like that up”
well I’m a woman so anything I do will be witchcreaft. I would probably try to get to north america in some way and warn them “the fuckers are coming”.
that would mess up the future lol
“Hey ladies… Ever been with a guy who can read?”
I’ll probably die of dysentery. Just because I know modern hygiene rules doesn’t mean I’ll survive interacting with all the other people who don’t but are used to local bacteria and viruses.
This is probably the most realistic answer. Either you die quickly or you’d wind up, spreading some major contagious disease that nobody has a defense against and wipe out a huge section of the population.
spreading some major contagious disease that nobody has a defense against and wipe out a huge section of the population.
How do you think the boobonic plague got started?
Yeah, it was a time traveller
i mean i don’t think it would even be that difficult to just always carry a bar of soap with you and make sure to boil your water and only eat well-cooked food, and wear gloves as often as possible.
sure people would think you’re silly and annoying but that’s a pretty cheap price to pay for not catching terrible diseases.
It would help to at least try doing that, but in practice this would probably be very difficult - it’s likely not possible to always drink boiled water and well-cooked food, and given the possibility of contaminating food and drink after boiling, you might effectively have prepare all your drink and food yourself, which is logistically difficult given the length of the work days. Diseases also spread in other ways, like smear infections (e.g. on toilets, doorhandles, tools) and airborne infections.
Assuming I am physically in the same place, I will fall to my death. If I somehow survive the fall I would be severely injured and alone in the wilderness. Within a few days I would probably die of either my injuries, dehydration, or hypothermia.
Scientifically speaking, the earth is constantly moving in an upward spiral. Your exact physical location would put you in some random outerspace area without oxygen or any protection. Just floating in space until you die.
Scientifically speaking, there is no absolute reference frame. So you can be wherever you like depending on what reference you choose.
How do you define upwards in space? North? Or maybe normal to the orbit and vaguely north?
I’m on the Gregorian calendar, 650 years ago is the year 1375. I’m in North Carolina, so if I were to snap back in time at my present location I would be a blue eyed white guy in pre-contact North America. And while I think I’m an above average candidate for the Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court scenario I’m not realistically able to start “from scratch.” I’d probably make it the summer on forage and my own body fat. I don’t picture encountering the natives going particularly well, for me or them. I’m not sick and I’m vaccinated against a lot of shit but watch I’ll give them 6 centuries worth of influenza updates.
I don’t think it would help that much being plunked down in 14th century England; we’re talking Geoffrey Chaucer’s lifetime here, to them I’d sound insane. Modern English is a few hundred years off. If they didn’t trepan me to let the demons out of my skull and I didn’t die of smallpox, I’d try to invent the electric motor 500 years early and be burned for heresy or some shit.
The only non-delusional answer lol
Yeah, I’m here thinking my ass in America pre Columbian exchange is not doing well. Maybe if I make it clear somehow I do not want to do anything but help I could…idk, be part of a native tribe and maybe give them a slight help to the upcoming horrors for them?
It’s not going well for anyone.
Well, I would give you the answer, but since I snapped back as soon as I read the post, I’m now responding what has been 650 years later for me, and I’m too fucking old for this shit a second time. I bypassed getting snapped back this time by just not reading the post and coming straight in to comment.
Now, what will happen if I read the
I would kill everyone I meet with the plagues I carry which I’m immune to.
You might have a bad time with all the plagues that have gone extinct since then.
Double entry accounting system.
I’m an accountant by trade. The double entry system wasn’t invented until the 15th century.
I could account for any lords various assets, goods, and livestock in an efficient, reliable and accurate manner
Being too early to market something also leads to failure
It’s never too early to efficiently count your sheep!
As an Australian I would struggle significantly unless you were to also transport me geographically.
I would imagine the east coast / tasmania could be interesting. There used to be hundreds of different peoples that are now extinct and we know nothing about. I struggle nevertheless.
Fuck I think I could just vibe with the Noongars, hunting, fishing and sleeping til I died of old age.
Maybe use basic science and chemistry to improve sanitation and quality of life. Not too much, just enough to be regarded as a clever fella, not a warra wirrin bad spirit.
Wash my hands
The definition of succeeding just becomes not dying.
Given the rate at which people would become mentally or physically disabled because of diseases, you could argue it would have a network effect (probably a better term exists): I would have more chances to meet people and influence them, to learn something useful, to accumulate and use wealth for the above, so yeah…
Everyone dies. You just get to try to make the leaderboards, if that’s your thing. There isn’t a killscreen that we know of.
Now you’re a witch
That would be a warlock I guess.
Where do you wash your hands? Hope you brought a big bottle of disinfectant.
Running water would allow for 30% reduction in bacteria, according to some sources.
Also, in that time period soap was known in Spain, France and Italy, and I personally made it in the summer using either olive oil or pork fat.
Crude soap is easy to make. Wood ash + water + fat. From there you just fiddle with ratios and timing while trying not to burn your skin off with strong alkalinity.
Any body of sufficiently rapidly running water should suffice.
Die because my medications haven’t been invented yet.
Or be murdered because I’m not christian
for reference they would almost certainly not murder you for not being christian, at worst you’d be forced to convert and only if you refuse to do that would they sentence you, and even then they might well cut a hand or ear off instead of outright killing you.
Nothing. I’d sit under an tree and enjoy the peace and quiet. No trump. No DC. No MAGA. No reporters. No non stop ads. No social media. No Google. No Elon. No bezos. The list goes on. Sure I’d probably die of some random disease or bandits. But I’d be okay with it at that point.
Well you can do that today. Find a tree out in the middle of nowhere and sit under it without any electronic devices. Then you are oblivious to all that stuff. You may be bothered by the fact that the things are still happening, but there are also plenty of horrific things happening in that time period you went to, you just won’t be keeping track of them.
Well you can do that today. Find a tree out in the middle of nowhere and sit under it without any electronic devices. Then you are oblivious to all that stuff.
There is much wisdom buried in what seems like a simple comment here.
Even if you aren’t in the middle of nowhere, you can find or create your oasis.
you might well also die from being called to arms to fight for your king… sadly we won’t be rid of tyrants until we collectively oust them and ensure they are never allowed to rise to power again.
Market myself as a powerful man of religion and/or magician, depending on the local vibe. Then use knowledge of science and tech to build myself a reclusive retreat where I can have regular baths and write books with predictions to mess with the world 650 years after I would die.
keep in mind that historically all the successful scientist have been really quite rich, so make sure to find a noble you can impress and get to sponsor you at first
I like your style. If you really wanna have some fun, don’t name the United States as the United States, but name the year and then say something to the effect of the most powerful nation in the world will come under rule of an authoritarian individual who has dreams of becoming a dictator.
I love it! Predict that a large empire of equals will fall after 250 years.
I know thousands of songs. Also, musical instruments like the saxaphone haven’t been invented yet.
honestly this might actually be the best idea, for most of human history people have been absolutely bored out of their minds and sharing news/stories/songs and really any sort of entertainment has been a perfectly legitimate way to get free food and housing.
any of us could almost certainly just live as travelling bards and do side jobs for actual monetary pay, provided you can get over the embarrassment of performing for an audience, and of course learn the local languages and translate the stories you remember.
Oh I think you’re the first person to suggest music! That is a really good idea, provided you don’t die of dysentery of course.
Here are some good time travel stories.
bookshop.org/p/books/…/7282193?ean=9780553575385&…
To Say Nothing Of The Dog. In the future, time travel is organized like the Army. The problem is that the actual travel causes a serious case of ‘jet lag.’ All the agents act like they are half-drunk and sleep deprived.
bookshop.org/p/books/…/693820?ean=9781606644874&n…
The Big Time. Two alien races are fighting a time war that spans all planets in the universe. Earth is a minor backwater, but the fighting is just as deadly as anywhere else. A few soldiers and entertainers are catching a few moments respite in a R + R center when the War crashes in on them.
Predestination. A man is offered a chance to find and kill the guy who ruined his life. All he has to do is trust the stranger who is making the offer.
You would die. There are many, many examples of explorers from “advanced” civilizations getting shipwrecked or stranded in an area where primitive hunter-gatherers live. Unless they are saved by the hunter gatherers, they are doomed, despite their knowledge of science and technology. Joseph Henrich talks extensively about these examples in his book, “The Secret of Our Success”
Check out this video to get an idea -> m.youtube.com/watch?v=jaoQh6BoH3c
ah yes the famous hunter-gatherers of the 14th century…
considering the modern population distribution, the vast majority of people would end up in places that were large urban areas even back then.
Yes, but what about you?
Of course I want to think I would do better. Maybe I would manage to integrate with the local indigenous people, but the reality is I would likely die. Either way my knowledge of science and “advanced” civilization will benefit me not at all.
If I time traveled to the same geographical region, considering I'm in South Brazil, if I don't get immediately killed by some jungle animal or tropical disease, I'd probably end up starting a pandemic among the natives.
I would pretend to be super-religious. Throughout the whole of human history, pretending to be super-religious has always been a viable path to survival and personal advancement.
Apart from that, I’d probably just die.
Oh! You could start Mormonism! Its super new as far as regions go and it was mad easy to convince the masses it was real, all you do is say you have special tablets of text that only you have been given the ability to read by God, and BAM new religion just launched and you’re the leader.
to be fair i think the fact that it started in the US is quite vital to it taking off, if you tried it in mainland europe the local priest would come over like a mafioso and politely explain that if you were to have an unfortunate accident then your soul would be spending eternity in hell.
The best way to find hidden treasure is to hide the treasure yourself!
612 years in the past
In Brazil
Well
As a person from modern times – From AFTER the Americas came into contact with Europe, if I went near a person here in the Land of Palms (that’s what the natives called Brazil!) from those times we’d both get horribly infected and die a lot due to how antibodies work. Viruses did a lot of the legwork in genociding the natives.
The place I currently live in is slowly turning into a desert, but was a deep jungle back then.
… I think I’d just die? Become food for a jaguar or sth.
Would love to indulge in the fantasy of giving the Guarani people guns and a warning to shoot white people on sight just to see how history would change, but that ain’t happening.
1375…
We can work with metals, so we can probably make boilers.
I invent steam power 400 years early.
You’d need metallurgy which was only invented in the process of building bigger naval guns, much later.
The issue was pressurizing the steam, which want possible in the middle ages. You had no rubber for seals, no steal that would hold, and no tools to drill holes precisely enough.
That’s why the Romans already used stream for simple parlor tricks but it couldn’t be made to do actual work until the modern era
Real science and innovation comes in increments
no rubber for seals
Modern synthetic rubber would indeed be unavailable, but I vaguely recall reading something to the effect that early steam engines used leather seals or something like that.
But yeah, there’s a lot of missing prerequisites for machinery. Even simple rotary power – like from a windmill or waterwheel – would suffer from being incapable of long distance transmission
Re-invent. Your still far too late to be first.
the real trick is to find some appliation for the technology that is easy enough to build that you don’t need later advancements to pull it off, yet useful enough that anyone is actually going to bother doing it.
or like, be really good at marketing
Wait 612 years and buy Microsoft.
Try to find the nearest shaman, apothecary or herbalist and trade my future clothes/pocket contents for some hallucinogens and painless poison. I ain’t living through a time before electricity.
I reread the Bitcoin paper yesterday, so with my newly refreshed knowledge id find the nearest mathimation, explain it to them, implement the protocol with paper records, handwritten hashes, and messages on horseback or something. After a few years when every major economic power realizes how valuable a deflationary currency that Mansa Musa doesn’t control (14th century african gold-salt bazzilionare, ~400 bill USD today), the price of my currency would increase vastly, making me super rich.
So dead
other people would probably have a higher chance of dying than me from the immunity I’ve got and all the diseases I carry
What place do I get teleported to? If I’m teleported to the same place on Earth, then I just fell down several meters into a swamp and am probably going to die here.
I would teach London children the most obnoxious brain rot slang from today as a laugh.
I would warn the Native Americans about the Europeans
I’d die pretty quickly.
I’d be dead since the Earth wasn’t in the same position 650 years ago. Even taking that out of the equation, I’d die since I can’t communicate with anyone and don’t have the survival skills.
I’d make some fucking soap.
probably die
Wouldn’t I be in like empty space?
softcat@lemmy.ca 5 weeks ago
die almost immediately
CarbonatedPastaSauce@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
Yeah, this. I have medications I need. When the pair of contacts in my eyes fall out eventually, I’m functionally blind. All that aside, I’d probably starve quickly since I don’t know how to make weapons and other humans haven’t made it to where I live yet in 1375.
I’d probably look around for a couple days and then when I got super hungry just find a cliff to jump off.
adarza@lemmy.ca 5 weeks ago
and if you manage to evade physical harm, sickness will surely catch up with you. the black death was not a ‘one and done’ pandemic. it lingered and persisted here-and-there for centuries after the widespread pandemic (known today simply as ‘the plague’) that claimed 50m+ lives, including half of europe’s population at the time