Why do we still joke about setting up old wooden guillotines?

Submitted ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨Seigest@lemmy.ca⁩ to ⁨nostupidquestions@lemmy.world⁩

I see all the memes about guillotines for the rich, funny in spirit, but actually building one in the town square is not practical. They take a ton of materials, they are huge, and they do not even work reliably. Would it not make more sense to build one from metal with hydraulic pistons or something? I am not a machinist, but a more mobile unit you could wheel into a square to decapitate a few effigies seems about as effective for sending a message, and easier to remove or relocate if needed.

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swordgeek@lemmy.ca ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
If it’s about sending a message, then the item itself is the conveyor of the message, not an unrecognizable but more efficient substitute. The guillotine is a recognisable symbol of people rising up and seizing power from the criminal ruling class. It is a warning and a threat.

If you plan on actually executing people, then sure - optimize all you want, or just go with a bullet to the brain.

But as a symbol, the guillotine is powerful.

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- over_clox@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  Let’s not encourage the troll. Sure there are certain people that it won’t hurt my feelings at all if they suddenly stop living, but at the same time I don’t agree with the death penalty, I think that just makes the executioner just as evil, if not moreso, than the person getting their head lopped off.
  
  Death no good yo.
  
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  - Deflated0ne@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    That’s a nice sentiment. But an unrealistic one. Be the bigger man riding his high horse down the high road after we win. These people kill us every day. With the police. Via social murder. Deaths of despair. Poiaon food and water. All their fault. An intentional policy choice.
    
    If we have to kill them to win. Then they gotta go.
    
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  - missingno@fedia.io ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    I'm against the death penalty because I don't believe it should be necessary in a just world, nor should the state ever be trusted with that kind of power.
    
    However, I see the guillotine as symbolizing the last resort in an unjust world. The worst monsters in society commit their injustices in broad daylight, and nothing will be done about it. We know that justice will never be served through the courts. So what then?
    
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  - sopularity_fax@sopuli.xyz ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    They are already the executioners. The guillotine is all about executing the executora
    
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  - dickalan@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    Troll is a matter of perspective and in this situation you are the troll so what were you saying again
    
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Mubelotix@jlai.lu ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Ugh? Guillotines are very reliable actually. And it’s not that expensive, everything is wood except the large blade. Also, you can’t fake an execution, the crowd will be satisfied when they see the head

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- FaceDeer@fedia.io ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  It can be faked.
  
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  - deepus@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    Damn, MSR was sooo good
    
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  - Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    I remember these specials from the 90s. They also did one with secrets of pro wrestling. Except the pro wrestling secrets were all very outdated and no longer being used.
    
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- Witchfire@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  
  not that expensive, everything is wood
  
  Oh how times have changed
  
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- Bishma@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  Don’t fix what’s not broken
  
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agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Guillotines are too tame for modern audiences. Wood chippers are fresh and exciting.

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- StopSpazzing@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  Ohhh that’s great!
  
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Kolanaki@pawb.social ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Ton of materials?

It’s just a large frame to hold a big knife dropped by letting go of a rope. The hardest thing to get would be the blade, and the whole thing could be constructed in under 2 hours.

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6nk06@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Do know what a meme is?

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- GrayBackgroundMusic@lemmy.zip ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  Honestly, some people don’t. Assuming op isn’t trolling, one of my kids is like this.
  
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Diddlydee@feddit.uk ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Nobody is wanting to build a guillotine. it’s simply a symbolic reference to the French Revolution.

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- GrayBackgroundMusic@lemmy.zip ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  Exactly. It’s like when people joke “eat the rich”. Zero desire for cannibalism, but 100% desire for the rich to be removed from the earth.
  
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  - TheButtonJustSpins@infosec.pub ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    Compost the rich.
    
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  - Ryanmiller70@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    I have a desire for cannibalism. I’ve heard human meat can be pretty tasty when cooked and seasoned just right.
    
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- BurgerBaron@piefed.social ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  Building is a lot of work. Using one is another story.
  
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njm1314@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Who is joking?

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Lumidaub@feddit.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Same reason we still “hang up” the phone.

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AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
You can make them modular, with telescoping rails, for portability. The blade needs to be weighted, but the weight can consist of a stack of weights, like on gym equipment. In fact, you could probably repurpose a bench press machine into a guillotine with a few minor modifications.

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- Lushed_Lungfish@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  It’s called a Smith Machine.
  
  Really smooth action.
  
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- Uruanna@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  You can also add jets to make it shoot down faster.
  
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Nemo@slrpnk.net ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Because if we talk about guns and bombs we end up on a list.

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mrgoosmoos@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
I like your approach here of making a clearly wrong statement just to get more activity on this important topic

I will add yet another comment that guillotines are neither complicated nor require much material. you could make a sturdy one with less than a dozen 2x4s, some screws, a scrap piece of rope, and whatever junk metal you have lying around that’s around 24x8 (which you need regardless of how fancy the frame itself is)

that said, mobile ones seem like they would also have a purpose

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Typotyper@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Use a log splitter with a different blade, higher capacity valance and an accumulator for faster action. Strengthen the frame and maybe add a dampener for the end of stroke so things last longer. Reloading ca be controlled by smaller hoses.

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- bizarroland@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  Don’t log splitters work incredibly slow?
  
  That’s not really gonna chop people’s heads off, rather it would inexorably pinch their necks until their head falls off.
  
  That’s pretty fucking gruesome.
  
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  - NABDad@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    If we’re going for gruesome, how about we build a huge version of one of those slicers that they feed vegetables in, and just feed the oligarchs into it.
    
    Gives you the option to feed them head first if you want to show mercy, while still being able to feed them in feet first for someone like Musk.
    
    Then they are cut up into small, easy to compost pieces.
    
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  - Typotyper@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    Most wood splinters do move slow but that one (Large valve and accumulator) would make it faster.
    
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- FaceDeer@fedia.io ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  
  so things last longer.
  
  Sadism is a negative, not a positive.
  
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  - WhyJiffie@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    I thought they mean it for the equipment, that it does not fall apart so fast
    
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  - Typotyper@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    “Last longer” was referring to the machine life not the execution. The accumulator is there to make it painless.
    
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Akasazh@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Same reason people have crosses on them. It’s a symbol.

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nutsack@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
if it were up to me, i would use a chainsaw

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- Dionysus@leminal.space ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  With a ball chain on it instead, make the moment last longer.
  
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Triumph@fedia.io ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Why am I thinking of a d4a/InheritanceMachining crossover episode?

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Paragone@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago
Because we don’t see what real, actual, guillotines do.

I accidentally saw a guillotine-execution on DuckDuckGo ( they used to be much worse than they are now, for including stuff you don’t want to see )

and … it’s kinda hard to communicate how WRONG that is, to chop a human-life to that degree of … to just-now-dead…

interesting: I can’t communicate how wrong/horrible it was, through words!

Anyways, there’s some German word, looks sorta like schedenfruede or something like that…

it means “finding enjoyment in other people’s suffering”, and old-people don’t find it funny, generally, because old-people have experienced enough diversity-of-suffering to be able to understand other-people’s perspectives…

The more one sees what people mean, the more one has to choose a self-defense-for-one’s-psyche strategy:

either sensitivity, in which case one has to avoid the coarser & worse stuff in life, systematically … XOR

de-sensitization, in which case one can joke about it, push it, even do it, because one is making one’s essence become mechanical/dead to what one’s engaging.

There’s a story of Hinduism, during the British rule of India…

Some privileged people got together to do some hunting…

1 of those was Indian, he’d used guns, before, he just hadn’t destroyed someone’s life, before…

After he shot a naturally-magnificent animal, & saw it dying as a result of his bullet, he put down his rifle, & left, never returning to that kind of culture, again…

IF sensitivity is one’s path, like making oneself into a combination microscope+telescope, spiritually, THEN … this kind of reaction becomes inevitable.

You just can’t accept what a real guillotine-execution is.

Joking-about such stuff is fine until you actually understand what it means … & then … you can’t joke about it, anymore.

Like Ukranians are unlikely to be able to joke about what Russia did to Mariupol, you know?

It’s too live-wire fresh a wound…

Having seen what a 1-to-2-second long video of a guillotine-execution looked like, I’d now say that only the evil could do them, repeatedly.

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TranquilTurbulence@lemmy.zip ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
I propose we build a large paper cutter style contraption.

Let’s make the blade 5 m long so that it’s big enough for everyone to see. Also, the blade should be so heavy that it will always chop reliably. You should also put some nice bearings in the pivot point so that it always swings very smoothly.

Oh, but how do we lift a heavy blade like that? If electricity is available, you could have an electric motor to lift it up. If not, you would need some rope and pulleys.

As the blade falls down, it would need to shear the target material to make a clean cut. This means that you can’t have a huge gap between the blade and the lower surface it shears against. Just like in paper cutters, the stationary blade needs to be made of steel, but it doesn’t have to be super sharp. The gap is important though. Think of the gap between scissor blades and you’ll get the idea.

As the contraption will inevitably be contaminated with organic material, it could have an integrated Clean In Place system. After each cycle of operation, the CIP should spray the affected area with cold water and soap. If that doesn’t do the job, there would be a second program that uses hot water and soap, which would obviously require more energy.

All that water needs to come from somewhere, so you’re going need like an IBC container. If you need more than 1000 l, you might need to use a lorry to deliver enough water. Ideally though, you would operate in an area where you can just connect the contraption to a nearby water outlet. Ask a local a firefighter to help you out.

Also, all of that water needs to go somewhere too, so I would recommend operating it in a place where there’s a sewer near by.

Hold on, what was the question again? Got carried away by the logistics of all of this.

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