Open Menu
AllLocalCommunitiesAbout
lotide
AllLocalCommunitiesAbout
Login

Barbers HATE this one simple trick

⁨838⁩ ⁨likes⁩

Submitted ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨MacNCheezus@lemmy.today⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩

https://lemmy.today/pictrs/image/ea3395ca-61b9-49c4-bc20-e02701c1dff7.jpeg

source

Comments

Sort:hotnewtop
  • BreadOven@lemmy.world ⁨16⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Maybe he can just try out one more haircut. Maybe to just below the chin. Preferably with a large blade falling from some height. All you need is a basket infront to catch anything that falls off.

    source
    • MacNCheezus@lemmy.today ⁨15⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      But who will deliver my 2am drunk purchases next day for free? Communists? I didn’t think so.

      source
      • BreadOven@lemmy.world ⁨15⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Robots? Communist robots? Who knows what could happen with the redistribution of wealth.

        source
        • -> View More Comments
  • hperrin@lemmy.ca ⁨14⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    At $30 per haircut, you’d need about 8 billion haircuts skipped to save that much. Dude must cut his own hair every few milliseconds.

    source
    • SirQuack@feddit.nl ⁨7⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      At $30 per haircut

      What? That cheap? When I went to a mediocre barber, I had to pay 35 eur, but now it’s more like 45 eur. ^(forgot to shitpost)

      What kind of economy are you in? My haircuts are 48 million euro per month (they’re on a subscription, but I locked in a good deal as an early adopter), that’s why I’m not rich, no other reason.

      source
    • hotchops@ani.social ⁨7⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Bald leadership pays off.

      source
    • bebabalula@feddit.dk ⁨7⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Two words: Compound interest 🚀

      source
    • MacNCheezus@lemmy.today ⁨12⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      No one said it was gonna be easy.

      source
  • BallShapedMan@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    What the hell am I going wrong then? I’ve been bald for 3 years and I ain’t got jack shit!

    source
    • MacNCheezus@lemmy.today ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Perhaps you forgot to invest the savings into building a global e-commerce empire.

      source
      • pelespirit@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        It’s getting a 200K funding from your dad that’s the real trick. He also worked for a large company making money at the time, he wasn’t trying to survive.

        source
        • -> View More Comments
    • Thorry84@feddit.nl ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      3 years? I’ve been bald for 20 years and I’m 300K down the hole, when does this trick kick in exactly?

      source
      • MacNCheezus@lemmy.today ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        You spent it all on avocado toast, didn’t you.

        source
    • IndiBrony@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Mate I was balding when I was 19 and went full cue ball when I went 23. I’m 36 now. Where the fuck is my money??!

      source
      • nightwatch_admin@feddit.nl ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        You and me both, my friend… remember Balding Elon Musk? I think it’s not so much the lack of hair, more like the lack of ethics.

        source
  • CaptDust@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Steve Jobs would wear the exact same outfit, Every. Single. Day. That’s the kind of dedication needed, most people aren’t cut out for it.

    source
    • scytale@lemmy.zip ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Dude didn’t even shower to save on water bills.

      source
      • Skullgrid@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        He didn’t even buy any expensive cancer medicine, he just drank smoothies.

        /uj I’m not even making this shit up

        source
        • -> View More Comments
    • Tollana1234567@lemmy.today ⁨14⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      ALSO he was on a juice diet to treat his “very slow growing rare pancreating cancer”

      source
    • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Silicon Valley turtleneck was just the Mao Suit of its era.

      source
  • vane@lemmy.world ⁨20⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Jeff Bezos cooking recipie.
    Not need to shave Jeff Bezos before put him in oven.
    Just stuff him like a chicken.

    source
    • MacNCheezus@lemmy.today ⁨20⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      What sort of herbs and spices would you recommend?

      source
      • vane@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Lemon & Thyme Roasted Chicken looks nice. Not sure how Jeff will apply to that recipe, maybe his meat is to old and it’s only for coq au vin.

        source
  • Beebabe@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Cheapest haircut in my town for my hair type is $75+tip. I just cut it myself now.

    source
    • Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works ⁨15⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Probably not as good as being bald, but you’ll probably save at least a few billion.

      source
    • Aussiemandeus@aussie.zone ⁨21⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Jesus christ.

      Are you a woman and is that USD?

      The most I’ve ever paid was $65AUD for a hearcut and beard trim in a mining town where the majority earned over 200k a year

      source
      • Beebabe@lemmy.world ⁨21⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Yes, a woman, and yes USD. That’s the no-frills salon price for a trim for my hair which is “long/thick (curly)”. The more expensive places range into the $200s.

        source
        • -> View More Comments
    • MacNCheezus@lemmy.today ⁨15⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Good news, at this rate it will only take you 3178666666.66667 haircuts to be as rich as Jeff Bezos.

      source
  • dbtng@eviltoast.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    I stopped cutting my hair when Covid closed all the barbers. Got a fukin mane now. Dunno, seems to have worked out. Still waiting for my billions tho …

    source
    • Aussiemandeus@aussie.zone ⁨21⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      No, no, see this is why you will never make it.

      You gotta be bald

      source
      • dbtng@eviltoast.org ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        That seems like a positive result!

        source
  • sniggleboots@europe.pub ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    don’t fall for it, everything you save on barber visits you spend on razors

    source
    • manigordo@lemy.lol ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Don’t believe this guy, he is a barber!!!

      source
    • lime@feddit.nu ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      i spend €8 a year on razors, how many barber visits is that?

      source
      • buffing_lecturer@leminal.space ⁨20⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        what do you use?

        source
        • -> View More Comments
    • basxto@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨13⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      I know at least one person who thought about getting it lasered

      source
  • samus12345@sh.itjust.works ⁨23⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Image

    source
  • HugeNerd@lemmy.ca ⁨21⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    #2 clipper and I do it myself. I try as best I can to chop away the gorilla fur from my neck to my shoulders with the beard attachment of my razor. ta dah.

    source
  • sundray@lemmus.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    There’s more going on here the just the lack of hair. What secrets is he keeping under that shiny dome of his?

    We must go deeper.

    source
    • bstix@feddit.dk ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      That’s no moon.

      source
    • DmMacniel@feddit.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Hans, get ze drill!

      source
    • hakunawazo@lemmy.world ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Image

      source
  • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Jeff Bezos saved hundreds of billions of dollars by downsizing his wife.

    source
    • MacNCheezus@lemmy.today ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Who will go down in history as one of the best traders of all time.

      Image

      source
    • VitoRobles@lemmy.today ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Makes sense, especially in this economy

      source
  • Kandy4me@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Avocados.

    source
    • NoForwardslashS@sopuli.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Avocados are so expensive, that’s why Jeff turned his head into a giant avocado pit. Infinite avocado hack! ~whenever he finally decides to bury his stupid fucking head underground~

      source
  • lugal@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    And than there is me who is bold and still goes to the barber because the feeling of someone else cutting your bold head with a razor knife is just great. Also I have a long beard which is the main reason to go to the barber but I digress

    source
    • Proprietary_Blend@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Lol. Bold ass mf

      source
      • lugal@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        Demn, I ollweys confuse English vowels

        source
        • -> View More Comments
  • SolarMonkey@slrpnk.net ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Bullshit.

    Bezos can’t cut his own hair. He can’t see that far up his own ass even with all the mirrors in the world.

    He probably spends more to be bald than it would cost to get all new hair.

    source
    • basxto@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨13⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      drones are a thing

      source
  • ordnance_qf_17_pounder@reddthat.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    This is the real way to save money on barber bills

    youtu.be/oqRRi81jsgI

    source
  • moosetwin@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Is this how dougdoug rolls in the big bucks?

    source
  • terminhell@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Can confirm - am nearly bald and never seen billions touch my hands.

    source
  • loomy@lemy.lol ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    makes sense

    source
  • tacosanonymous@mander.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Chase watches Ryan George, confirmed.

    source
  • InternetCitizen2@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Around my area it is hard to find a barber for under $20

    source