lemmy.blahaj.zone has a decent amount of women and both their admins are women, it’s not a “women’s space” as one would describe since everyone is welcome there but it’s probably the closest thing one would describe as an instance “by women for women”. I am obligated to mention that it is a queer instance and that many of the women there are either trans themselves or strongly supportive of trans people, and do not tolerate transphobia or anti-LGBT sentiment (including refusal to support LGBTQ people) at all.
Are there any Lemmy/Mbin instances by women for women?
Submitted 5 weeks ago by tfm@europe.pub to fediverse@lemmy.world
https://europe.pub/pictrs/image/6622b80a-7b1a-4470-b395-a04b3d2de8d6.png
Comments
Draconic_NEO@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
Nursery2787@lemmy.ml 5 weeks ago
Beat me to it. Their zero tolerance for misogyny/transphobia extends to who they federate with. If a server doesn’t care about its users being transphobic then it gets the axe. I remember it being a big hub bub because an instance was actually using its defederation option.
UprisingVoltage@feddit.it 5 weeks ago
Good.
3dmvr@lemm.ee 5 weeks ago
spinster exists but I think its the opposite where its antitrans
tomenzgg@midwest.social 5 weeks ago
We all pretend that it didn’t exist and do not acknowledge its presence; that’s the informal rule.
Draconic_NEO@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
Yeah Spinster is generally considered a hate site, and consequently is very widely defederated, even from general purpose instances like lemmy.world. Also it’s less of a Reddit alternative and more of a Twitter alternative but is technically redundant since you can do everything you did on there on the real thing instead.
StarlightDust@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 weeks ago
The admin behind it is also a man so its for (some) women by a man. Literally the opposite.
Walk_blesseD@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 weeks ago
I thought that was mastodon. Do they have a lemmy instance as well?
finitebanjo@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
Everyone Except Fascists and/or Tankies
Draconic_NEO@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
I think that kind of goes without saying.
Konkyer@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
As much as I appreciate the community and users at Blahaj, in my personal experience, the moderation was fairly wanting. At least a year or two ago (not sure about now), they tolerated some pretty freakish right-wing people who enabled chasers and other weird shit on their communities.
Draconic_NEO@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
They certainly do not seem very tolerant of that now, they very commonly ban people for thinly veiled homophobia and transphobia that would normally slide on other sites. They do not even seem mildly willing to tolerate the intolerant.
StarlightDust@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 weeks ago
Lemmy has an undeniable woman problem that it carried over from Reddit. I’ve lost count of the number of pathetic blokes that I have blocked on here for anti feminism.
AllHailTheSheep@sh.itjust.works 5 weeks ago
yep it’s pretty horrible. any time gender issues are brought up there’s dozens of comments saying “what about the men” and completely missing the point
Hupf@feddit.org 5 weeks ago
bane_killgrind@slrpnk.net 5 weeks ago
The response to “what about men” comments is, we’re already talking about men when we talk about misogyny. Misandry and misogyny are the exact same problem, strictly enforced gender roles. If you deviate, you are punished. The men that are caregivers are derided just like the women that refuse to rear children. Every other related paradigm punches down into the people who do not conform. Stoicism in men, histrionics in women.
Either is a foil for the other and it’s exactly the same bullshit.
TankovayaDiviziya@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
As a guy, I do recognise that men are disadvantaged in many areas and need to be put on equal footing with women-- like courts disproportionately award custody of children to mothers, regardless of how unfit the mother is to be a caregiver. But broadly speaking from my pespective, women are still at more disadvantage. I used to live in a bad part of my city for many years and have had little to no issues. However, it is a different story from women I spoke who got harrased, and another hit on the head. They said they will avoid going to the city ever again. I remember sharing the accounts of these women to other men, and the men were surprised because their experience is the complete opposite. Women are still seen as weak. And in the corporate hierarchy, men (of tall statures) disproportionately make up the board of directors and executive roles.
KeenFlame@feddit.nu 5 weeks ago
What about them
mholiv@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
100%
It’s really bad and lemmy is really in denial.
Sexism here is much worse than it was on Reddit.
It feels like 2008 Reddit here sexism wise, except instead of Ron Paul libertarians tooting their horns everywhere we have heavy teacher vehicle enthusiasts.
I did hope lemmy having a left leaning culture would help but it does not.
misteloct@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
Oh yea? One time I got kicked in the balls and it kinda hurt. Women have it soooo easy.
drunkpostdisaster@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
you mean the comments that have been downvoted to the bottom?
KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 weeks ago
Try making any post that focuses on situations uniquely or disproportionally experienced by women and you get mostly “what about men” or “men have it worst” responses.
that’s kind of just how controversial things are on the internet though.
Evens shitposting from men will get similar responses from women, it’s just how it is now. Sort of always has been.
Konkyer@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
Some instances have a left-leaning culture. Lemmy.world definitively does not.
LadyAutumn@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 weeks ago
Youre absolutely welcome to join Blahaj zone. Our wonderful administration team (both of whom are women) bans misogyny whenever it comes around to our communities. The mods for our main communities share a very aggressive moderation policy.
SoftestSapphic@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
They also ban real users instead of the people literally calling their gender “dragonfucker” and “attack helicopter”
The blahaj admins are trolls
Cryophilia@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
I give Ada a lot of credit. In the early days, I had the following interaction:
TOPIC: Something about sexual/gender preferences, I don’t remember, asking people their preferences
Me: responds with my preferences (I’m straight cis male, I like women so I’m down with post-transition trans women but pre-transition don’t turn me on)
Some random user: respectfully asks if I would be willing to date a pre-transition trans man
Me: I guess, but it probably wouldn’t work due to the fact that what I like about their body, they hate
Some of those professionally offended people took a misleading screenshot of my response and started screaming about “chasers”.
Ada did an admin post to the community backing me up and calling those idiots out.
So unless she’s changed a lot, I don’t think she’s a troll. It would have been easy to go with the mob but she stuck up for me.
AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
They also turn a blind eye to misandry.
sudo@programming.dev 5 weeks ago
The pronoun was just “drag”. PJ is the one who kept calling them “dragonfucker”. You can go read dragonriders comments instead of just repeating gossip.
KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 weeks ago
“dragonfucker” and “attack helicopter”
i mean, if they’re doing it as a haha funny, i see no harm, but if they’re also being assholes, i think that takes precedent. You aren’t legally required to fill in your gender tagging appropriately so.
cupcakezealot@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 weeks ago
also our wonderful admin kaity did what the lemmy devs couldn’t and nuked the dm spam :)
StarlightDust@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 weeks ago
It really seems like instance admins tend to do a much better job with a lot of stuff on here than the core devs. Its a shame that forking would take as much work as it would.
Lemminary@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
Pfft, I’d say overly aggressive to a fault. It’s not a good thing when they’re banning people for a passing comment where the worst offence is “gatekeeping” rather than something that matters.
Realitaetsverlust@lemmy.zip 5 weeks ago
Probably the … fourth-worst well known instance. Idk if that’s a good suggestion.
Konkyer@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
As much as I appreciate the community and users, there are (or at least were) serious moderation problems on Blahaj, I did not feel safe there when I tried it a year or two ago.
LadyAutumn@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 weeks ago
I definitely cannot agree. I encourage anyone who has any issues with moderation to make a post in the Blahaj meta community. Ada and Kaity have been spectacular and have responded to every issue I have come across. There are limits, they can’t preemptively prevent any kind of moderation issue but they respond quickly.
merc@sh.itjust.works 5 weeks ago
This seems like a very good niche for someone willing to do it. Problematic accounts could get a site-wide ban instead of each woman having to ban someone herself.
dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 weeks ago
this is a bit of how Blahaj works as I understand it, so it’s a good model - if anything I would think Blahaj might already be poised for this kind of instance-level protection of women
teatimeplease@lemm.ee 5 weeks ago
Lemmy needs block lists users can subscribe to like they can on BlueSky, it would make a huge difference imo.
Eiri@lemmy.ca 5 weeks ago
But like what even is a social media for women? I wasn’t aware the ones we currently have were for men
Tonuka@feddit.org 5 weeks ago
reddit has /r/TwoXChromosomes which is one of my favorite subs. It’s a general womens subreddit, and though it obviously leans feminist it’s not its main purpose. It welcomes all genders, but remains a womens space.
The fediverse could really use that energy.
lunarul@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
There’s also /r/WitchesVsPatriarchy which is also very strictly woman-centered.
poVoq@slrpnk.net 5 weeks ago
We used to have an equivalent on our instance, but it was constantly flooded with reply-bros and trans people complaining about the name, so we archived it as no women was willing to moderate it (for understandable reasons).
hanrahan@slrpnk.net 5 weeks ago
Yeah but thats a subreddit not REDDIT itself, you can similarly start a /c/TwoX on jist about any Lemmy instance.
slingstone@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
I wondered if they made the jump over here. Guess not, sadly. Reading that sub has made me a better man, because it offers some pretty harsh critiques of male behavior.
3dmvr@lemm.ee 5 weeks ago
Its all technically ran by trans women which is mildly interesting, like the mods of 2x and the others on reddit and here I think
3dmvr@lemm.ee 5 weeks ago
on reddit every female sub is ran by the same woman
Cryophilia@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
Most of the fediverse is male, and there’s a significant trans woman space, but there’s no spaces that really cater to cis women or to trans men specifically that I’ve seen.
And yes, I think it’s reasonable to look for a space that is strongly (though not exclusively) cis-woman, in the same way that a Protestant would feel out of place in a Catholic community, even though they’re all Christian. I imagine most cis women feel the same way as I (a cis man) feel when going to blahaj - like a friendly, allied visitor in a foreign land.
andros_rex@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
I can’t think I of a single online space ever that has catered to trans men.
I guess Hudson’s Guide lol.
CheeseToastie@lazysoci.al 5 weeks ago
There is! It’s !WomensStuff@lazysoci.al
Taleya@aussie.zone 5 weeks ago
Depends. You looking for a woman’s apace…or a terf space?
tfm@europe.pub 5 weeks ago
I definitely think it should be an inclusive, not exclusive space
Taleya@aussie.zone 5 weeks ago
blahaj.zone is a great one I’ve found. Extremely inclusive, brooks absolutely no bullshit from bad faith actors.
Is also very very queer tho JSYK
barsoap@lemm.ee 5 weeks ago
That can describe a bar that throws out Nazis or a Nazi bar, depending on perspective.
carotte@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 weeks ago
its kinda sad how one of the biggest women’s community on the lemmy/main side of fedi is !femcelmemes@lemmy.blahaj.zone…
i mean, it’s a great community, but yea.
Mubelotix@jlai.lu 5 weeks ago
There seems to be a majority of males even in that community though
gwen@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 weeks ago
every femcel community gets invaded by guys at some point. see: r/letgirlshave fun and r/femcelgrippysockjail. theres one that went private and thats keeping out the men really well (and is the only community im still on reddit for)
pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 weeks ago
Hahaha the name doesn’t do it justice tbh, *cel has connotations that femcelmemes really just doesn’t have
MECHAGODZILLA2@midwest.social 5 weeks ago
The comments here make me very disappointed in our little corner of the internet. If anyone wants this but doesn’t know how, neither do I but I’d be happy help.
i_dont_want_to@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 weeks ago
I am disappointed but not surprised. The attitude of men here reminds me a lot of default subs in Reddit. People tend to be more civil, but there is so much “but what about men?” when talking about women’s issues or belittling women still. Business as usual on the Internet, but I can see why it would cause women to avoid Lemmy.
I haven’t been back to Reddit, but it makes me miss the small niches where I didn’t see that as often.
Irelephant@lemm.ee 5 weeks ago
Call it out when you see it. Keep the bar nazi free.
CheeseToastie@lazysoci.al 5 weeks ago
There’s !WomensStuff@lazysoci.al
frog_brawler@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
I think there’s a few tutorials about how to set up your own lemmy instance. If so compelled; go for it! If you have any sort of IT background it’ll probably be pretty easy.
Ulrich@feddit.org 5 weeks ago
Pardon my ignorance but what would be the point of that? You can sign up on any instance and participate in any women’s communities. It’s not like there’s any way to verify the user’s gender anyway.
Genius@lemmy.zip 5 weeks ago
A community like that would hopefully ban misogynists who go unbanned on other communities.
pseudo@jlai.lu 5 weeks ago
Local feed I guess. I wouldn’t trade my french local feed to another despite the abillity to subscribe to the community that made it.
Cryophilia@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
You really don’t see the benefit to a group of similar people to have a space focused on them, their wants and needs and daily lives? A community of people like them? It’s one of the most fundamental human desires.
KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 weeks ago
with enough admin and moderation you could circle jerk your way into a “woman positive” or “woman friendly space” which would be the idea.
FundMECFSResearch@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 weeks ago
Lemmy,blahaj,zone is run by Ada, who is a woman
SoftestSapphic@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
I wish I could recommend blahaj, there are a lot of trolls in the space that the admins have successfully been guilted into supporting.
ZeffSyde@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
I want there to be a witchesvspatreiarchy here, but I’m a dude and it’d be messed up if I started it.
hendrik@palaver.p3x.de 5 weeks ago
beehaw.org aspire to be nice, friendly diverse and safe. But they're more towards nice, not women. And we have lemmy.blahaj.zone for queer folks. To my knowledge, there isn't a place aimed towards women. Maybe heehaw is the closest... Still not really a fit.
Snoopy@piefed.social 5 weeks ago
I find this idea pretty cool, i hope they will succeed to achieve that. Imo, we lack diversity on the forum6erse except maybe mastodon.
It would provide an additional layer, another governance, they could also benefit a lot from local community and can check vote...Other have already mentionned good example with blahaj, beehaw.
On the other hand, it will render the instance more visible.
Lemgen@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
Create one!
Binette@lemmy.ml 5 weeks ago
I was thinking of making one, but I’m not a woman, so I’ll think of something else
Diva@lemmy.ml 5 weeks ago
hexbear is heavily transfem and bans aggressively for misogyny/transphobia. Spending some time there when their recent domain crisis defederated from the rest of Lemmy was actually quite relaxing
ocean@lemmy.selfhostcat.com 5 weeks ago
Like women only or hosted by women? Based on the selfhosted poll I’m guessing these is a 5% there is.
Jhex@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
it’s called pinterest
CheeseToastie@lazysoci.al 5 weeks ago
Yep we have !WomensStuff@lazysoci.al its a women only community by women for women.
Goldholz@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 weeks ago
Even if not, you can create one :3
SirSamuel@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
TW: crude and insensitive joke (hopefully the spoiler tag works lol)
! It’s funny, blahaj.zone is full of pussies, and .ml is full of cunts, and yet there’s no dedicated space for women !<
Vanilla_PuddinFudge@infosec.pub 5 weeks ago
Lemmy is aimed at pleasing all of humanity.
Asking for a women-centric flavor of any site is parallel to asking for a version with less men. If you’re implying there is a difference to the interests of both, I’d love to show you the Greg’s Anatomy sub.
MITM0@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
Reddit is pretty pro-female, what is this riddiculous gaslighting ?
Owlboi@lemm.ee 5 weeks ago
how would they stop men from participating?
FinishingDutch@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
Be the change you wish to see in the world.
It really comes down to this: if you want your own space for particular interests, you should create one and find likeminded people to populate it. Just waiting for it to magically appear isn’t going to work. Be assertive.
Enzy@lemm.ee 5 weeks ago
Onlyfans
pr0sp3kt@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 weeks ago
Why you want to create division?
sjmarf@sh.itjust.works 5 weeks ago
Community-wise there’s !WomensStuff@lazysoci.al
dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 weeks ago
unfortunately I think this is the current answer, at least on Lemmy.
TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works 5 weeks ago
unfortunately?