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Should you trust that doctor?

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Submitted ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨fossilesque@mander.xyz⁩ to ⁨science_memes@mander.xyz⁩

https://mander.xyz/pictrs/image/010b7731-b6a9-4d9c-9bd7-aa5d50c9233b.jpeg

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Comments

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  • shasta@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    When did the cat in the hat become his creator?

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  • bitjunkie@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Hannibal goes at the top-right if you’re not rude.

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  • Shard@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Excuse me! Dr Pepper should be an absolute top left corner candidate.

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  • NutWrench@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Dwarf Doc isn’t a medical doctor, that’s just his nickname. He’s a drug connection.

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  • Buddahriffic@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I’m curious what the rankings of all the star trek doctors would be.

    Like for competence, would Flox (sp?) or EMH top the list?

    Or for charisma, would it be Flox or Bashir?

    For not taking shit EMH or Bones?

    Closest with the captain, Bones or Crusher?

    Most victim of the writers, Pulaski or Fitzgerald? (First one at least got a season but the second one didn’t even get an actor)

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  • zeekaran@sopuli.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Phil and Venture at the same level of trust is rough but true.

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  • radicalautonomy@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    “Dr” Bubs is in Quadrant III. He’s the most quackinest.

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  • Subverb@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I’m just happy to see someone remembers the Spin Doctors.

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    • radicalautonomy@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      One…two princes kneel before you.

      One has diamonds in his pockets and never lies. The other wants to buy you rockets and never tells the truth.

      What is the one question you could ask of only one of the princes to learn what a prince and lover ought to be so that your father won’t eat his hat and disown you?

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  • ViperActual@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I’d gladly trust drinking a Dr pepper over anything to do with Dr Phil or Dr oz

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    • MutilationWave@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      I don’t even like Dr Pepper and I’d rather drink a six pack than watch either of those assholes.

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    • JargonWagon@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      THANK YOU. Why is Dr. Pepper the absolute lowest you can go on this chart, lower than Dr. Evil lol

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  • Tesla@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Where tf is dr house

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    • Sylvartas@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      It’s also inexplicably missing the coolest one (Dr Victor von Doom)

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    • mindbleach@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Off the top right.

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    • Sho@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Seriously…him and Dr. Strange alone would all but garuentee your safety.

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    • DonGirses@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      This vexes me.

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  • T156@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Dr. Zoidberg is a fully-qualified medical doctor, though, and a good one at that. Just not for humans. Even so, he’s quite good, given that he hasn’t killed any of his human patients, though they may come out a little different.

    As is Doctor Who, who has high qualifications in literally everything. It took them a few goes, but they got there in the end.

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    • meep_launcher@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      That said, how much do you trust your life with Dr. Who? I’ve seen many characters die while trusting him, and that’s just the ones on screen.

      I’m not saying he is a bad doctor, but he was caught on film losing several sidekicks/ allies. If you’re caught on film doing something, you probably do it a lot.

      If you get caught doing crack on the news, you are a crackhead. It’s not like a “oh this was just the one time” situation. You do it enough you get caught on the news doing it.

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    • Buddahriffic@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Didn’t Zoidberg once successfully attach Fry’s head to Amy’s body (or something like that)? Not sure any of the others on that chart have done something that impressive.

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    • RoidingOldMan@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      “I’ve probably lost more patients than he’s ever treated.”

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  • JackbyDev@programming.dev ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I should trust Zoidberg more than Dr. Phil?

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    • CheeseNoodle@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Technically zoidberg should be further right on the training axis than everyone else on it combined, He’s literally the best doctor in the universe for every single species other than humans.

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    • MehBlah@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Yes even though Zoidberg is a fictional doctor he is ten times the doctor as that quack phil.

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  • Itdidnttrickledown@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Dr Oz and Dr Phil are not doctors and should be to the left and south of Dr Pepper. Neither has a license and both are so full of shit their advice has probably killed people.

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    • chatokun@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Oz is a Doctor, and was a very good one who got corrupted in his aim for fame and fortune. Part of his tragedy is that if he’d shut up and just do his actual doctor work only he’d be a benefit to society, not the detriment he is now. It’s important to know that he’s worse because he had actual skill as a heart surgeon. Quoting wiki:

      In 1982, he received his undergraduate degree in biology magna cum laude[3] at Harvard University.[31] … In 1986, he obtained MD and MBA degrees from the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine[30] and Penn’s Wharton School.[34][35]

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      • Itdidnttrickledown@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        After hearing the pure stupidity that comes out of his mouth I wouldn’t let that fruitcake supplement salesman near me.

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  • MidsizedSedan@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Why is Dr Oz in the bottom right corner? Havent seen his show in a while

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  • helpImTrappedOnline@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Top right corner, there’s a Collage Humor watermark.

    It explains why this is so inaccurate

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  • beebarfbadger@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    *Hannibal Lecter

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  • problematicPanther@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I thinki. Could trust Dr Dre a bit more than what you’re saying I should.

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    • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Why don’t you ask Dee Barnes…

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    • Comment105@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      I feel like Dre is a smart guy, he could figure out how to do a tracheotomy.

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      • J_N_F@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Y’all notherfuckers act like they forgot about Dre

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  • Slovene@feddit.nl ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    You’re missing Dr. Zhivago, Dr. Kevorkian and Dr. Shipman.

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    • problematicPanther@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      I’d trust Kevorkian, but only if I’m ready to die.

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      • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Kevorkian wouldn’t have dreamt of hurting a person who he hadn’t made 100% sure was a candidate for assisted suicide. He seemed like an extremely principled man.

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  • FlyingSquid@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I would trust J.D. with my life way over Dr. Seuss.

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    • mipadaitu@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Depends on which season. Are you extrapolating current JD? Or can we pick season 1 JD, where he has a lot of knowledge, but very little experience, and wasn’t a very good doctor yet?

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      • FlyingSquid@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        SO’S YOUR FACE!

        Image

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    • DillyDaily@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      He’s also much less racist!

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      • FlyingSquid@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Of course not! He’s Vanilla Bear to Turk’s Chocolate Bear!

        ^(We^ ^don’t^ ^discuss^ ^Caramel^ ^Bear.)^

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  • Rin@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Dr Pepper very nice tho

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  • FuryMaker@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I feel like Zoidberg should be a lot lower.

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    • TimewornTraveler@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      lmao I had to scroll back up

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    • LovableSidekick@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Zoidberg once heard Fry say blood was thicker than water and wrote down: “Blood…thicker!”

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    • SuspiciousCatThing@pawb.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Nonsense! He’s been taking humans apart for years. He can rearrange your body parts into any order you want.

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  • beefbot@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Ah, I see there was no room to include Janet Doctor Scott Janet Brad Rocky Bullwinkle.

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  • Chekhovs_Gun@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    You’ve got Doc Ock but no Doc Doom?

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    • Knock_Knock_Lemmy_In@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      No film experience yet.

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  • PlantDadManGuy@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    No Doc Holliday?

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  • Mango@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    You should probably switch Zoidberg with Dr. Pepper.

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  • leftzero@lemmynsfw.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    The Doctor is only on “TRUST WITH YOUR LIFE” as long as you aren’t messing with (or have ever attempted to mess with) humans or other people they care about… otherwise they’re on “RUN, RUN VERY FAR”.

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    • Knock_Knock_Lemmy_In@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      You don’t want to be an incidental character when The Doctor is about.

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      • helpImTrappedOnline@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        You also don’t want to be his companion…your best off jumping to a different reality and getting far away from London.

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  • leftzero@lemmynsfw.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    No Doctor Nick…?

    Image

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    • FlyingSquid@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      HI, EVERYBODY!

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      • bjoern_tantau@swg-empire.de ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Hello Dr Nick!

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  • yemmly@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Ah, the late, great Hannibal Lecter.

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  • averyminya@beehaw.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I think Dr. Honeydew needs to be a little bit lower. Something about him just seems… Dangerous.

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    • wewbull@feddit.uk ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Depends if you’re his assistant or not.

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  • blanketswithsmallpox@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    The more anyone looks at this, the worse it gets.

    Someone needs to fix this. But not me, I don’t have my doctorate in memeology yet.

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