I write code
Radon
Submitted 1 month ago by Ek-Hou-Van-Braai@piefed.social to [deleted]
https://media.piefed.social/posts/zO/K3/zOK3Et78HdokqR1.png
Comments
Olgratin_Magmatoe@slrpnk.net 1 month ago
kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world 1 month ago
I generate bugs.
dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Honest.
Ek-Hou-Van-Braai@piefed.social 1 month ago
I make programs
Quokka@quokk.au 1 month ago
I make problems
Truscape@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 month ago
Practical problems, solve
drath@lemmy.world 1 month ago
I suck dick
avidamoeba@lemmy.ca 1 month ago
Nice to see you here Mr. President.
VitoRobles@lemmy.today 1 month ago
Ah, it’s nice to meet another fellow customer service rep.
frezik@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 month ago
Is this really the message we want to send?
Yes, our society makes lots of bullshit jobs. That’s because capitalism can only keep people employed by creating bullshit jobs, and unemployed people are six missed meals away from revolution. That is not the fault of the people who have bullshit jobs.
And no, I won’t accept “this is just a shitposting sub, lighten up” as a response. This is just another form of kicking down, and it isn’t funny. The working class needs solidarity, not this.
VitoRobles@lemmy.today 1 month ago
When I saw it, it was posted on sites to mock this thinking.
Yeah, someone believes it to have made this. But yeah, that person sucks.
SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Agreed, but I refuse to extend that acceptance to most consultants.
angstylittlecatboy@reddthat.com 1 month ago
Yeah I really don’t like the “blue collar good tech bad” undertone here
rumschlumpel@feddit.org 1 month ago
Further reading: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bullshit_Jobs
Socialism_Everyday@reddthat.com 5 weeks ago
Yes, our society makes lots of bullshit jobs. That’s because capitalism can only keep people employed by creating bullshit jobs, and unemployed people are six missed meals away from revolution
Couldn’t be further from reality. Capitalist firms actively hire the least amount of people possible, because if they can get away with equal production and lower number of employees, that means higher profit.
Capitalism is actually the only system in human history with unemployment: it wasn’t a thing in hunter-gatherer society, it wasn’t a thing in early agricultural societies, it wasn’t a thing during the times of slavery, it wasn’t a thing during feudalism, and it hasn’t been a thing in any communist nation such as Cuba or the USSR (both guaranteeing jobs to every citizen as a right, and the latter having 10% of all positions vacant from 1970 onward).
Capitalism maintains an unemployed sector of the population because:
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Employing more workers costs more money to firms
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Having high unemployment decreases wages, improving profits of firms
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Having a pool of unemployed people allows firms to spawn, grow and mutate without difficulty of finding workers to do so.
-
merc@sh.itjust.works 5 weeks ago
Is this a war on being specific?
If a fisherman says “I operate the winch on a bowpicker tuna fishing boat”, is that a bullshit job?
If a middle-management yes-man who exists only to fluff his boss’ ego describes his job as “I encourage excellence” does that mean his job is no longer bullshit?
alyth@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
“I encourage excellence” - Chef Excellence
LumiNocta@lemmy.zip 5 weeks ago
I guide people
Why is everyone always annoyed at managers?
merc@sh.itjust.works 5 weeks ago
A lot of managers are pretty useless. Some degree of management is needed because you can’t just have 10,000 individual contributors all reporting directly to the CEO. But, a lot of managers get where they are by schmoozing, claiming credit, shifting blame, avoiding responsibility, etc.
Treczoks@lemmy.world 1 month ago
So I either have a bullshit job “I design chips for isosychronous low-latency networks” or a real job “I herd electrons”…
icelimit@lemmy.ml 5 weeks ago
You do math.
svcg@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 weeks ago
I write code. ✔️ Real job. I chop down trees. ❌ Bullshit job.
missfrizzle@discuss.tchncs.de 5 weeks ago
I fell trees!
you can use “fell” as a transitive verb. it’s a little archaic but sounds cozy.
Novamdomum@fedia.io 1 month ago
Extreme physical danger of drowning, hypothermia, severe injury, insane hours, unpredictable income, huge mental and emotional stress in an industry that often damages the environment and is plagued with human rights abuses?
This comic feels like it was written by the fisherman.
ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Or one of those boomers, who really wanted AI to replace all the intellectual workers, so they either can be stay-at-home mothers or go to “real manly jobs”.
phdepressed@sh.itjust.works 1 month ago
Yeah as if farmers aren’t using gps guidance climate models soil analysis and gmo/selection etc to try and eke out some profit vs the megacorps.
hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 month ago
I’m pretty sure that it was definitely not made by anyone who’s a fisher.
snooggums@piefed.world 1 month ago
This comic looks like it was drawn by the fisherman.
real_squids@sopuli.xyz 1 month ago
Grimy@lemmy.world 1 month ago
I am an aquatic resource acquisition specialist leveraging distributed ecosystem monitoring, real-time biological signal analytics, and manual–mechanical retrieval interfaces to optimize biomass extraction.
P1k1e@lemmy.world 1 month ago
I fix shit
cows_are_underrated@feddit.org 5 weeks ago
monotremata@lemmy.ca 5 weeks ago
Rolive@discuss.tchncs.de 5 weeks ago
Everybody do the flop!
Limonene@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
“Refrigerator Wifi Firmware”
3 words, but my job is still bullshit.
bigkahuna1986@lemmy.ml 5 weeks ago
So you’re the guy responsible for ads? Get him everyone!
Toes@ani.social 5 weeks ago
You’ve been tagged as fridge ads. 🤭
Rooster326@programming.dev 5 weeks ago
You are the firmware?
dreadbeef@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 month ago
i make websites
humorlessrepost@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Can confirm this works, since fullstack is a real job, but I can’t describe my frontend bullshit in 3 words.
Digit@lemmy.wtf 1 month ago
I make art.
^ real job.
I get disability benefit trapping me in dependence on the system under threat of impoverishment, destitution, starvation, freezing, if i dare ever attempt to do anything productive, or even look like it, or even not. Paid to do nothing.
^ real bullshit job.
Oh what a great system you have there. >:[
hOrni@lemmy.world 1 month ago
“I hate it”. Does this count?
HenriVolney@sh.itjust.works 1 month ago
Emails and meetings
Karjalan@lemmy.world 1 month ago
You just successfully described 95% of modern office jobs
BotsRuinedEverything@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Make missiles hit.
Objection@lemmy.ml 1 month ago
Maybe don’t.
Buddahriffic@lemmy.world 1 month ago
You’d think that would help but it probably means they just send more missiles and hit more random things around the target.
Psionicsickness@reddthat.com 1 month ago
He’s a fertility doc.
myotheraccount@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
I code
_stranger_@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
The requirements said three words, that’s how know you’re a dev and not a PM pretending to be technical.
MajorasTerribleFate@lemmy.zip 5 weeks ago
“I write code”
Luvs2Spuj@lemmy.world 1 month ago
My job is bullshit, but my job is not who I am.
rustyfish@piefed.world 1 month ago
Same. I don’t work because I like my stupid ass job. I work because I like everything outside my job and some of these things are in dire need of being financed.
magic_lobster_party@fedia.io 1 month ago
Generate shareholder value
blackris@discuss.tchncs.de 1 month ago
I know it is a shitpost but this fucking fisherman that kills animals and destroys our environment. He is the worst. Fuck you fisherman!
No_Ones_Slick_Like_Gaston@lemmy.world 1 month ago
He also leaves nets in the sea when they tangle, because plastic is cheap and fuck the ocean is their preferred pronoun.
Truscape@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 month ago
“Hey look buddy, I’m an engineer. That means I solve problems.”
Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca 5 weeks ago
I jerk off.
BilboBargains@lemmy.world 1 month ago
OPs has distilled his job title from ‘political agitation meme technician’ to ‘shitposter’.
NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
I fix things.
ethaver@kbin.earth 1 month ago
Refreshments and Narcotics
(an old joke about registered nurses)
turdcollector69@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
Cum on camera
OF is a real job
Tikiporch@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Saying “I catch fish” is as descriptive as the first guy saying “sales analyst”. Second person is a software developer, second guy is a systems architect. So you catch fish? Sure. What kind? On a river? In the ocean? Do you really just press a button that rolls up a big net full of turtles and dolphins as well and you’re destroying the delicate balance of a fragile ecosystem? Are you a fishing guide?
Anyone can describe their job in three words. Understanding it is on you, man.
psx_crab@lemmy.zip 1 month ago
First one: i analyse sales.
Second one: i automate production
Third one: i’m a fucking idiot
ApertureUA@lemmy.today 1 month ago
It doesn’t fit
blarghly@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Imma fucking idiot
_lilith@lemmy.world 1 month ago
well the job is BS so…
guy@piefed.social 1 month ago
I am idijit
x4740N@lemmy.world 5 weeks ago
“I’m Stupid” works
Vellaides@lemmy.zip 1 month ago
Fourth one: I murder living beings so humans can eat their corpses
5in1k@lemmy.zip 1 month ago
Nom nom nom.
zxqwas@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Going further with wikipedias article and some of their bullshit jobs listed:
Telemarketing: I sell stuff.
Corporare lawyer: I explain law.
Academic administratrors: I administer students/professors
Compliance officer: I check compliance.
psx_crab@lemmy.zip 1 month ago
Corporate lawyer would be : i’m an asshole