Excuse me, my esteemed aerial cephalopod, but I don’t see a doctor in front of your name. Those sodas didn’t end up hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt getting their doctorates to be dissed by you.
We were warned.
Submitted 11 months ago by FlyingSquid@lemmy.world to [deleted]
https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/de77ebcd-e486-41e3-a1c0-4bf9ea7295ab.png
Comments
billiam0202@lemmy.world 11 months ago
FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 11 months ago
I’m far too modest to mention my 6 years at Harvard Medical School followed by a 4 year residency at Johns Hopkins and, of course, my 134 published papers in medical journals.
ZeroCool@feddit.ch 11 months ago
a 4 year residency at Johns Hopkins
I smoked pot with Johnny Hopkins… It was me, Johnny Hopkins, and Sloan Kettering… And they were blazin’ that shit up everyday!
the_frumious_bandersnatch@programming.dev 11 months ago
It’s really too bad Kroger discontinued “The Fizzicist”.
dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world 11 months ago
That’s a frustratingly good name too.
creditCrazy@lemmy.world 11 months ago
I don’t normally drink sodas but man do I want to drink that for the name alone.
Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 11 months ago
The bar for soda medical school is just so damn low.
therealjcdenton@lemmy.zip 11 months ago
ICastFist@programming.dev 11 months ago
Moist Jesus
Curiousfur@yiffit.net 11 months ago
Mr. PiBB dropped out of college
jaybone@lemmy.world 11 months ago
I didn’t go to college for eight years just to be called Mister Pepper
Got_Bent@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Back in my soda drinking days, Dr. Thunder was pretty legit.
alquicksilver@lemmy.world 11 months ago
It’s a damn good replacement for Dr. Pepper, even today. Hell of a lot cheaper if you ever buy in bulk.
Mr_Dr_Oink@lemmy.world 11 months ago
You missed Professor Peppy.
I know there’s probably more, but i feel like this one is important.
FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 11 months ago
He’s not a real doctor!
funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works 11 months ago
how do you know it’s a He 😮💨
Moof_Kenubi@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Me trying to explain the backstory of Britain’s longest-running sci-fi series
creditCrazy@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Dr.who now that’s a soda I have yet to try
creditCrazy@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Doctor:I’m the doctor. Me: dr what? Doctor: no no you’re supposed to say who. Why did you say what. Doctor who intro starts and the title is “the carbonated waters of Mars”
konalt@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Fucked up in the crib sippin dr perky
FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Can you imagine if you went to the E.R. and were told your attending physician was Dr. Perky?
JackiesFridge@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Friend of mine: ‘Haven’t been “Dr Perky” since my first kid.’
brlemworld@lemmy.world 11 months ago
All this and yet Mr. Pibb is a step too far.
EpeeGnome@lemmy.fmhy.net 11 months ago
I respect any soda that puts in the time and effort to earn a doctorate degree. You know who I don’t respect? Mr. Pibb, who can can take his undergrad ass and fuck right off.
FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Excuse me, but Pibb now identifies as Xtra, not Mr. I think we should respect their gender identity.
recapitated@lemmy.world 11 months ago
It does take a medical degree to know that stepping on a cushion would be comfy.
ummthatguy@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Slovene@feddit.nl 11 months ago
Does Dr. Oetker make soda?
CanadianCarl@sh.itjust.works 11 months ago
The nazi pizza company? www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-24580073
Even_Adder@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 months ago
Dr. Perfect
Ok buddy, chill out.
FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 11 months ago
I’m not looking for Dr. Perfect, just Dr. Nice.
Vuraniute@thelemmy.club 11 months ago
Dr Perfect is the enemy of Dr Good Enough
victron@programming.dev 11 months ago
Best I can do is Dr Fine.
BobTheDestroyer@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Mom: Have you seen a Real Doctor yet?
Me: …yes…
victron@programming.dev 11 months ago
Leave Dr Shasta alone. That shit (and its variants) slaps.
SPRUNT@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Cream Soda Shasta in a half-can is a time machine that sends me to my grandparents house when I was 7.
victron@programming.dev 11 months ago
My daughters love cream soda shasta. And so do I.
dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Not pictured: Dr. Smooth
(although it’s been a long time - maybe they don’t make this anymore?)
aeronmelon@lemm.ee 11 months ago
In the name of the Coke, the Pepper, and the Holy Sprite.
dingus@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Is Dr. Perky a plastic surgeon?
MargotRobbie@lemmy.world 11 months ago
I don’t see a Dr. Harleen Quinzel anywhere.
FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Is there a drink called Mr. J?
door_in_the_face@feddit.de 11 months ago
M0oP0o@mander.xyz 11 months ago
Ha, Dr perky. Nice.
Tofushopdriftin@lemmy.world 11 months ago
I want a Dr. Becker. I loved that show
FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Highly underrated show. It made me realize Ted Danson was actually funny long before The Good Place.
LEONHART@slrpnk.net 11 months ago
Bored to Death did that for me.
ElBarto@sh.itjust.works 11 months ago
I like Dr. Spice, no fucking around with them.
someguy3@lemmy.ca 11 months ago
My favorite was one called “Spritz Up”
SuperIce@lemmy.world 11 months ago
“Dr. Fine Soda”
FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 11 months ago
He’s not Dr. Perfect and he’s not Dr. Right, but he sure is Dr. Fine.
squiblet@kbin.social 11 months ago
My favorite dumb Dr. name was "Dr. Furr's" from Furr's supermarkets in the 80s
FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 11 months ago
There is some erotic Dr. Furr fan fiction that will not surprise you.
squiblet@kbin.social 11 months ago
I’m not sure how Roy Furr would feel about that. I wish I could find a photo of some old guy from the 60s to link but apparently it’s also the name of an Internet marketing person.
SnappDragon10@lemmy.today 11 months ago
Cool, now I’m on a quest to sample them all
WashedOver@lemmy.ca 11 months ago
It appears to be the majority of Doctors most Americans can afford…
FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 11 months ago
This is not what I thought they meant when they said universal healthcare.
Wermhatswormhat@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Child: Mom can we have universal healthcare? Mom: We have universal healthcare at home. The healthcare we have at home:
It’s easy, pick any doctor in your network.