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⁨491⁩ ⁨likes⁩

Submitted ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨weird@sub.wetshaving.social⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩

https://sub.wetshaving.social/pictrs/image/4bb0ebc8-008c-45aa-8252-828b4f6f8fa8.webp

source

Comments

Sort:hotnewtop
  • sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    This really smashed my dick with a hydraulic press

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    • BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Boy de fok!

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      • DJKJuicy@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        Holy shit an in the wild Hydraulic Press Channel “Vot De Fok” reference on a random Sunday evening!

        This short thread following the OPs post got me good. Thanks for the uncontrollable 60 seconds of laughter!

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      • Quetzalcutlass@lemmy.world ⁨18⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        It some kind ov exploded!

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    • Evil_Shrubbery@thelemmy.club ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      And then ultimate-goatse my butthole with the jaws of life.

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      • Evil_Shrubbery@thelemmy.club ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        But then the next step absolutely sounded by urethra with Uralmash-15000 deep bore drill.

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        • -> View More Comments
  • Broadfern@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Free top surgery if I read?

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    • Cris_Color@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Damn, thats a real hot finance tip

      HEALTH INSURANCE COMPANIES HATE THIS ONE SIMPLE TRICK! 😱😱😱

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    • Findus_Falke@feddit.org ⁨18⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Depends on what they mean by “clean off”. I suspect it’s not going to be as clean as you’d imagine.

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  • HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Image

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  • kelpie_returns@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Oh! My tits, no!

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  • TankovayaDiviziya@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    If The Onion is an actually serious journalist website, this will be their type of headline. They’ll fully embrace sensationalist headline without being clickbait.

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  • RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Reductress is a hell of a website.

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  • JerkyChew@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    I’m jacked! Jacked to the TITS!

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  • 1984@lemmy.today ⁨18⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    We dont use that phrase “blow your tits off” nearly enough. :)

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    • TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Because it’s soooooo 2015

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  • ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Help, now my manboobs have been blated off, everything is covered in blood and human fat tissue, and also I’m bleeding out!

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  • thenoirwolfess@lemmynsfw.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Omfg this is a song

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    • Starski@lemmy.zip ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Idk if it’s just the mobile version but that website is designed horribly, I spent five minutes simply trying to get the whole name of the song to show up, as I was curious how much of what was written above is in the song name, but no matter what you can’t see it. Turning my phone sideways just made a thing on the side show up proportioning everything the same as before turning it sideways, the credits have the exact same issue with not showing the whole name, including while sideways, and I can’t play the song since I need to sign up for the service. Idk how someone could make something worse than Spotify, but this definitely hit the mark.

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      • thenoirwolfess@lemmynsfw.com ⁨12⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Idk it’s fine on the app but I see what you mean

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      • felsiq@piefed.zip ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        For me (safari on iOS) a long press brings up an expanded title, although that song’s title is so unusually long I had to drag it to the far corner of the screen to see it all lmao

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        • -> View More Comments
  • ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Ok but what happened?

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  • aeronmelon@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    I could not BELIEVE number 7!!

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  • Zier@fedia.io ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    What happens if you don't have tits? Or you do have tits, but are in another room when it's baking?

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    • weird@sub.wetshaving.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      I mean, what happens if you don’t have a left arm and try to chop it off with an axe?

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      • Zier@fedia.io ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        So it was you lurking in the forest. I knew someone was watching me when I tried to do that. Why are axes so heavy?

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      • HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        I wouldn’t have any arms left

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    • db2@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      1, you’ll grow DDs just so they can blow off. 2, distance is irrelevant, there is no escaping the clickbait cup crumping curse.

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  • Diddlydee@feddit.uk ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Reference is from the Dirty Harry remake, Dirty Bastard.

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  • Okokimup@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Well

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  • nautilus@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    smoove off

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