The ability to focus on stuff i am supposed to do
Let's play this game again
Submitted 10 months ago by LouSlash@sh.itjust.works to [deleted]
https://sh.itjust.works/pictrs/image/5938fefa-5cea-4a68-9122-f24ebe841074.jpeg
Comments
Little8Lost@lemmy.world 10 months ago
lengau@midwest.social 10 months ago
Congrats! You have this superpower and I am jealous.
Unfortunately you can now only concentrate on things you are supposed to do. You try to watch TV and you can’t follow the show because you’re thinking about how you need to mop the floors. Want to read? You can’t concentrate because you really should wash your windows. Your life becomes a hell of boring productivity. You lose sleep thinking about all the things you’re supposed to do, including how you’re supposed to be asleep by now. There is no more pleasure in life. There are no more quiet moments. There is only stuff you are supposed to do.
Little8Lost@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Oh no, than its close to now where i think about stuff i should do but dont, for reasons
bork@sh.itjust.works 10 months ago
What happens if you go to therapy and their recommendation is I relax? Does relaxation related activities then become what they are supposed to do?
There’s definitely a loop hole in here somewhere.
Asmodis@lemmy.world 10 months ago
How do you know how my brain works? ಠ_ಠ
NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world 10 months ago
I can play the kazoo really well, like Hendrix level kazoo playing.
phlegmy@sh.itjust.works 10 months ago
You look and sound like the ‘you on kazoo’ kid for the rest of your life. Even at 80 years old, everyone thinks you’re a 9 year old.
Cosmonauticus@lemmy.world 10 months ago
There was a cowboy bebop episode kinda like this. Sympathy for the devil I think
NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Worth it.
drspawndisaster@sh.itjust.works 10 months ago
Idk friends, I’m tired. Person who replies, please give me something cool.
Little8Lost@lemmy.world 10 months ago
… but you get some tasty food
UltraBlack@lemmy.world 10 months ago
You have constant diarrhea. You’re welcome
NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world 10 months ago
You get perfectly controllable, exact, and safe teleportation, even if you’ve never been to the place you want to teleport to, you can also teleport others with you, but you start menstruating really bad every time, doesn’t matter if you have the usual equipment. No matter who you are, and it also applies to anyone teleporting with you, you will find yourself in the middle of intense menstruation.
Don_alForno@feddit.org 10 months ago
Ok. You’re often tired, but coffee gives you super strength, Popeye style.
Hawk@lemmynsfw.com 10 months ago
Social Obligation.
drspawndisaster@sh.itjust.works 10 months ago
Awesome, so I can make people feel socially obligated to do things?
Everybody on the internet, we need to each give this person one dollar. Enjoy, friend.
Triasha@lemmy.world 10 months ago
I can shapeshift.
UltraBlack@lemmy.world 10 months ago
… into cheap chinese toys only
NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Into Ron Jeremy.
Triasha@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Thanks this one could be useful.
T00l_shed@lemmy.world 10 months ago
But only into a starfish
PacMan@sh.itjust.works 10 months ago
Your butthole is now sealed shut
ForgottenUsername@lemmy.world 10 months ago
You get food poisoning from everything you eat or drink
NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world 10 months ago
And all of my poop will teleport into the back of your throat when it arrives at what was once my sphincter.
JackbyDev@programming.dev 10 months ago
But,
rdri@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Ability to teleport any words I want into the mind of someone who is broadcasting or streaming anything over internet or radio or tv, that I currently watch or listen, as long as the broadcast is going on. For them it would be like hearing me as if I was in the same room. They won’t know anything about me other than realize I’m one of their listeners or viewers. It works only for one person at a time - the streamer/broadcaster or one of them. They can choose to tell other listeners what they heard, or not.
Little8Lost@lemmy.world 10 months ago
But you get tourette(?) syndrome
Inktvip@lemm.ee 10 months ago
Things always break for you just as you’re about to experience their reaction, regardless of the medium, abstraction or delay (live/recorded/news articles…)
T00l_shed@lemmy.world 10 months ago
They can, at any point shut you out.
livingcoder@programming.dev 10 months ago
The other person has to be asleep and hears it as a whisper in their dream.
rdri@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Nah, the ability works during the broadcast, without such delays.
toastmeister@lemmy.ca 10 months ago
The power to become the animal I last ate.
ForgottenUsername@lemmy.world 10 months ago
You’re a staunch vegetarian
Little8Lost@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Counts for going back to human too
Luminocta@lemm.ee 10 months ago
All the food you eat tastes bland, cardboard like.
Xkaliber@lemmy.world 10 months ago
It only works one way i.e. You can’t revert back to being a human unless you…
Sal@mander.xyz 10 months ago
You are a radical vegan
lemmylemonade@lemmy.ml 10 months ago
But you can only speak in Mandarin
JackbyDev@programming.dev 10 months ago
As a third party ref I am ruling that this does give you the ability to talk in Mandarin while in a non-human form.
quinkin@lemmy.world 10 months ago
But it includes all trace levels of insects in your food.
GusTheBard@midwest.social 10 months ago
The outcome I most want, when random chance is involved, will always occur if I first say the words “hoodoo moogoo”
danciestlobster@lemm.ee 10 months ago
But you have a severe gambling addiction
Jimmycakes@lemmy.world 10 months ago
You got a sore throat all the time so it really hurts to say it
livingcoder@programming.dev 10 months ago
I can pause time in order to write as much code as I want without interruption.
ForgottenUsername@lemmy.world 10 months ago
You can only write ‘hello world’
NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Air also stops, so moving causes unimaginable levels of friction and you cannot breath.
bob_lemon@feddit.org 10 months ago
The code can only be written in VB.Net.
Agent641@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Stack overflow won’t load while time is paused.
interdimensionalmeme@lemmy.ml 10 months ago
I would still pause time, and just chill there
JackbyDev@programming.dev 10 months ago
Still useful. Even if you only get like 10% more time during working periods that’s still a nice boost. Especially if you’re salaried.
Melatonin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 10 months ago
The entire superman set, minus kryptonite
valkyrieangela@lemmy.blahaj.zone 10 months ago
My superpower is pain
vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works 10 months ago
I have wolverine level regeneration.
kandoh@reddthat.com 10 months ago
I always succeed at anything I attempt
penguin202124@sh.itjust.works 10 months ago
Real life Ctrl+Z
Mojtaba@lemm.ee 10 months ago
I can create any liquid and control his Temperature
DrunkAnRoot@sh.itjust.works 10 months ago
i can delete one square meter wnywhere in the world and it just deletes the matter that was there
Washedupcynic@lemm.ee 10 months ago
With the snap of my fingers I can instantly cause the death of authoritarian dictators.
drmoose@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Can create perfectly round and transparent ice cubes out of thin air.
slappypantsgo@lemm.ee 10 months ago
This sucks because all of the responses are negative.
_LordMcNuggets_@feddit.org 10 months ago
I am ironman
Mr_Dr_Oink@lemmy.world 10 months ago
The power to negate side effects of any kind. :]
finitebanjo@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Unfortunately I am already perfection, and unfortunately the side effect is living amongst the humans and seeing them for what they are, unable to help them in meaningful ways.
MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca 10 months ago
Not having to sleep. You can just be awake 24/7 without the usual cognitive decline or feelings of being tired.
nichtsowichtig@feddit.org 10 months ago
impeccable social skills
Jumi@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Be able to transform into animals
lemmylemonade@lemmy.ml 10 months ago
ability to make people say what you want them to
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Shoot butts out my laser
Etterra@discuss.online 10 months ago
The ability to inflict my suicidal depression, sans the medication or benefits of years of therapy, into the minds of anyone I hate.
eyelevel@lemmy.world 10 months ago
interdimensionalmeme@lemmy.ml 10 months ago
Is not reincarnating an option?