If your relationships involve a “gut wrenching feeling 24/7” you might have other problems
Being single
Submitted 3 days ago by rabber@lemmy.ca to [deleted]
https://lemmy.ca/pictrs/image/e49d740a-4050-41b3-b00d-8bda718ba313.jpeg
Comments
palebluethought@lemmy.world 3 days ago
sundray@lemmus.org 3 days ago
“It’s just a matter of time before she discovers I’m only an emergency hologram…”
Pilon23@feddit.dk 3 days ago
Clearly a euphemism for anal sex. Once or twice a day is fine, but 24/7 is far too much. I’d also be hiding in nature at that point
grrgyle@slrpnk.net 3 days ago
Problem, preference, or orientation. It’s impossible to tell.
TrickDacy@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Op had a really bad relationship
rabber@lemmy.ca 3 days ago
Never recovered at least thus far anyway
oppy1984@lemm.ee 3 days ago
Honestly I get it, I’ve been single for 11 years now. I went through a series of toxic relationships and the last one broke me. After her I decided to take a break from dating a try to figure out why I kept attracting only toxic women.
It’s been 11 years and I still haven’t figured it out, and now I’m in my 40’s and don’t really want to date again. What I’m trying to say is, take some time, heal, get your head straight, but get back out there sooner than later. It’s easy to fall into the “I’m happier single” mindset, but difficult to get out of.
surewhynotlem@lemmy.world 3 days ago
at least thus far
You can do it!
Or don’t. Whatever life you want to live is fine. I’m not here to kink shame.
grrgyle@slrpnk.net 3 days ago
Damn I’m sorry to hear that.
stebo02@sopuli.xyz 3 days ago
jokes on you I have a gut wrenching feeling from being single
thatradomguy@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Same… pushing 31 and nada… fml
KeenFlame@feddit.nu 2 days ago
Nah, your life is cool anyway
Derpenheim@lemmy.zip 3 days ago
Time to end that relationship. I spend my day waiting to go home and see my partner
MBech@feddit.dk 3 days ago
That was the only thing that pushed me out of bed for a while, the fact that I’d get to come home to the perfect woman later.
andybytes@programming.dev 2 days ago
To be honest, it’s really hard to find somebody who is actually self-aware and empathetic. I mean, people talk the talk, but it seems like they’re not affected by things. I really do enjoy solitude and I’m not a lonely person really. Like, I would like to experience a full human life, but that’s not going to happen in this late stage techno feudal imperialism. What I’m saying is, the criteria for nonsense and bullshit is slowly becoming less tolerant on my end. Like, I would want somebody attractive, but I would choose the uglier person if they had a brain. I’m just keeping it real. Like in this world of billionaire nonsense where we’re bounced around like ping pong balls living inside of containers of bullshit are you able to see what actual human animal existence is really .can you put the modern world on pause and be a human being? Our lives are meaningless bullshit and people that infuriate me the most are those that are optimistic. Yet, if you got to know me, you would realize that I’m incredibly optimistic. But like all things are affected by their environment. For I am a product of my environment. Because you know, there is no war but the class war.
Ziglin@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Not in a relationship, feeling is there anyway.
rabber@lemmy.ca 3 days ago
[deleted]Ziglin@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Ok, to be clear I’m attempting to state the absence of a romantic relationship.
There are still people who have expectations that I need to fulfill including myself. Life is bad enough the way it is and by no choice of my own I regularly have to think about the person I have romantic feelings for. (Though that feeling is not inherently negative)
eezeebee@lemmy.ca 3 days ago
A wild Fenriz meme
Rin@lemm.ee 3 days ago
I’ve had a lot of painful relationships so i understand. It takes time, especially if you get burnt. It’s still good to find someone nice who will eventually become your one.
recklessengagement@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Dated a string of people who didn’t deserve my trust, so I know that gut-wrenching feeling all too well. Life is more peaceful without it.
Sillyglow@lemmy.ca 3 days ago
They always talk about wading through a bunch of weeds or whatever but hey, I get it, no one has that kind of time anymore to wade through a bunch of assholes to find the fhe one decent person anymore. Life gets short. It can become the kind of noise and drama you just don’t want to mar up your life with.
Out of the plethora of coffee dates from the online apps I’d say there were approx 90% of the people on there that really shouldn’t be dating others and should be in some sort of counselling or just straight up scammers. Several hadn’t been in any relationship that lasted more than 6 months for a good reason.
Even in the last 10% maybe there was no chemistry but I did make some friends. One I’m still good friends with even today since Covid times.
It took about 3 yrs to find someone worth dating. Like seriously it’s like friggin career training these days.
mEEGal@lemmy.world 3 days ago
yo Fenriz my man, wake up, you’re on Lemmy !
ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca 3 days ago
rabber@lemmy.ca 3 days ago
We’ve lost the plot if going outside is edgy
ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca 2 days ago
You can go outside while being in a relationship
The edgy part is posting this instead of not caring
seemefeelme@infosec.pub 2 days ago
Relatable. I’ve accepted I may never fall in love again.
5714@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 days ago
GYLVE
BuckWylde@lemmy.world 2 days ago
I wish I could hang out there with Fenriz
rabber@lemmy.ca 2 days ago
Go to kolbotn, he’s easy to find
MehBlah@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Happily single is how I describe it. Still got my kids and they are grown. No one has to put up with me and I don’t have to take shit from anyone in my personal life.
altphoto@lemmy.today 2 days ago
Jesus? Fucker! Wake up man! We need you! What you need a suit or cape or something? Get the heck up and start busting racist assholes! I would totally start with a little afganese testicle removal… But in godly excruciating slow motion. With an old, dirty, dull wooden roof shingle. Maybe add ghost pepper to the shingle in lemon juice, vinegar and alcohol mix.
termaxima@programming.dev 3 days ago
You’re not supposed to have a gut wrenching feeling 24/7 when in a relationship.
A relationship is just a friend you do extra things with.
Demdaru@lemmy.world 3 days ago
I dunno how I feel about this summing up. Like, yeah, but also so much more. For one they mostly remove gut wrenching feeling xD
CitizenKong@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Yep, a good relationship should just be your favourite person to spend time with that you also find sexually attractive (and vice versa).
scintilla@lemm.ee 1 day ago
Or no sexual attraction if you’re ace. I feel like people forget that ace people can be super into romance and the other parts of a romantic relationship.
Lemminary@lemmy.world 3 days ago
I have an anxious attachment style. My brain says no, fuck my feelings regardless. :(
problembasedperson@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 days ago
I’m gonna wrench her guts, alright?
Rin@lemm.ee 3 days ago
“extra things” ;3
ArtemisimetrA@lemm.ee 3 days ago
Or, to bring Relationshil Anarchism to bear, a relationship is an ongoing infraction between people, sometimes even just with one’s own self. Then, having established that a relationship exists, the participants of said relationship may choose to define said relationship using whatever terms and conditions they feel are fitting. And here’s the clincher: nobody outside of the relationship gets to have any say in what ANY aspect of that relationship means. Friendship? That’s literally got “ship” in it, but parenthood? Also a relationship. Professional, personal, inter-personal, monogamous, non-monogamous, poly, aromantic, FWB… All valid terms to use, and not a single one of them can possibly define a relationship by itself.
termaxima@programming.dev 3 days ago
I am a relational anarchist, but I was simplifying. No need for quantum physics where Newtonian physics do the trick !
KeenFlame@feddit.nu 2 days ago
I kind of get what you are saying but parenthood is not like this. The kid doesn’t get to have a say, and there are extremely important laws on what you can do both with kids and their other parent. And a hateship? Like, what if a dude just starts hateshipping you because he was mistreated and is in pain, you can call the police and say fuckety fuck off or go to jail, so society has something to say about it too. Even disregarding these exceptions, I don’t get a lot of aha moments from this perspective? Maybe that’s a good thing but I feel like if someone doesn’t understand these basic teachings about relationships, they’re probably traumatised real bad and it’s a good message. At the same time if it is aimed at bigots, they have pretty specific other reasons for why they think it’s their issue what other people’s relationships are about, and those are more akin to brainwashing and propaganda than straight trauma, (but it could always be both I guess). Free love has been around for many years now, and there was no societal issues, so any dissent on the topic should be extremely easy to dismiss. Maybe I’m underestimating the current state of the US though.
Monstrosity@lemm.ee 3 days ago
That consistent light nausea is just how true love feels, bro!