How do wealthy people know if the people they meet are wealthy or not?

Submitted ⁨⁨18⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨PixelNomad@sopuli.xyz⁩ to ⁨nostupidquestions@lemmy.world⁩

For example, if a wealthy person only wants to socialize with and date other very wealthy people, how would they know? Like, for example, what if LeBron James or Tyler Perry only wanted to be friends with other wealthy people and wanted their kids to only date and marry people from other wealthy families? How would they know the people they meet also come from multi-millionaire families? I’m sure if a random billionaire met someone at a club or social event, they wouldn’t introduce themselves by saying, “I’m X, Y, and Z, and I’m worth this much money.” What if a son of a multi-millionaire wanted to date a woman who came from a wealthy family? Also, if he meets a woman, how would he know if she comes from money or not? Like I said, she wouldn’t say, “I come from generation wealth” right off the bat.

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1984@lemmy.today ⁨2⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
Rich people arent even connected to people who arent rich. Its their entire ecosystem. Everyone has money, thats just how it is. They dont talk about money because they just have it. Its like air.

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BlackLaZoR@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
Do you think they care? Wealth isn’t a dick size competition. They socialize with coworkers old friends, family ect. like everyone else

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eestileib@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
They go hang out in incredibly expensive country clubs and on their yachts and at elite universities and prep schools, polo camps and air conditioned safaris.

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- RustyShackleford@piefed.social ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
  I mean, this is what my cousins did. It was creepy, till my I got in one little fight and my mom got scared, and said you’re movin with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air.
  
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- starlinguk@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
  I had rich grandparents and great grandparents and they didn’t do any of that. The only “rich” thing I remember them doing is going hunting.
  
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  - Seleni@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨hour⁩ ago
    I mean, what’s mentioned in this thread is what rich people I know do. Plus saw a lot of it in Palm Beach.
    
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exasperation@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
There are all sorts of filters:

Expensive clubs. Members only associations like country clubs can skew towards the ultra rich. Yacht clubs and polo clubs are kinda an extreme version of this, but there are all sorts of organizations where the membership can be assumed to be rich.

Expensive hobbies. Wine tasting, skiing, golfing, boating, horse stuff, biking, and traveling/vacations can range from the slightly expensive to prices that only the ultra rich can afford.

Related to both of the above, expensive places. If you’re skiing in an expensive resort town, and hanging out in the lobby of a $2000/night hotel, you’ll probably only see employees of these places or other very rich people. Some have even layers beyond that, like an exclusive members only club in an expensive area, or a separate lounge for only people lodging in the most expensive rooms in the hotel. Or if you’re at a private jet airport, and weather causes delays and cancellations, standing around in the terminal might allow you to mingle with other private jet people. Or if you live in a crazy expensive neighborhood or building, your neighbors are pretty much guaranteed to be rich.

Third party verification. Networking, introduction by mutual friends/acquaintances, even social media or dating apps where you have to prove your status/wealth.

It’s not all or nothing, either. Some places have a disproportionately high number of rich people but aren’t necessarily exclusive to the rich (private schools, certain types of clubs, certain types of activities/hobbies, public parks/restaurants/libraries/museums in rich areas). So a lot of rich people do mingle with the middle class, but often will feel comfortable letting their guard down more or less in particular places or in particular groups.
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- corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
  
  Or if you live in a crazy expensive neighborhood or building, your neighbors are pretty much guaranteed to be rich.
  
  Careful. We’re paying $4.10/sqft/mo rent and we are NOT rich; just in a very overpriced area.
  
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  - exasperation@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
    I assume in your city, $4/month/sq ft isn’t considered “crazy expensive,” though. In a place like San Francisco or New York, a $2000/month apartment that is 500 square feet wouldn’t register as anything notable.
    
    If it’s not considered “crazy expensive,” people wouldn’t assume you’re crazy rich just by living there.
    
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667@lemmy.radio ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
This is the function of exclusive social or networking events. Often either an exclusive invite list or very high plate price. You’re either invited to the table, or pay to be there.

Once you’re at the event, you’re either known, or engage in small talk where details are revealed. Here strategic partnerships form, or there are quid pro quo for access to secondary or tertiary networks.

It’s not what you know; it’s who you know.

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chahn.chris@piefed.social ⁨9⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
A lot of rich people actually try to live a normal looking life. Stealth wealth, and you might never find them until you get invited to their house.

Their house will be nicer than average, probably not crazy, but just a lot more than a typical person would have. They will have things like fancy light fixtures and switches that don’t look totally normal, the furniture will look normal but if you look closer you’ll only find high quality wood construction, tongue and groove, etc. You should also notice things are probably cleaner than a typical house (because regular house cleaner), everything works, and major appliances are newer generally. They are rich so they don’t have to make any budget trade offs.

These people might have insane net worth and they are trying to down play it because they know how bad it is for them when they are obviously wealthy for so many reasons.

Ostentatious wealth signals are usually sign of a HENRY or a striver, those people typically aren’t actually wealthy they have a lot of debt.

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- exasperation@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
  I don’t think this answer truly internalizes how some of the ultra rich live. Yes, many are living a normal looking life, going to their jobs and doing a lot of the same activities that the upper middle class do. They generally eat at the same restaurants, have the same hobbies, and enjoy the same television shows that the rest of the middle class does. Often they go to the same live events (sports, concerts, plays, stand up comedy) that middle class people do, and often don’t bother with luxury boxes or things like that. They’re members at the same gyms, and might plot out the same run trails as normal people.
  
  It’s just that they tend to fly private instead of commercial, stay at very nice luxury hotels unique to that particular location rather than the chains you’ve heard of. They have multiple homes. They’re members of clubs that require a lot more money to keep up in. They have lots of paid staff, both seen and unseen, smoothing over their day to day lives, washing dishes and laundry, maintaining houses and cars and landscaping, making reservations and doing paperwork on their behalf, etc.
  
  The form of stealth wealth isn’t that they’re all among us doing normal things, with no obvious indicators of wealth. It’s that they often aren’t even around us to begin with. So the sheer amount of time that they’re around non-rich people, and actively interacting with non-rich people, may be a tiny portion of their time. Even if they do a lot of the same stuff we do, and go to a lot of the same places we do. They do it in ways that don’t necessarily interact with us directly.
  
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  - chahn.chris@piefed.social ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
    That’s a fair take, vacations are for sure a place where the rich splurge, but at those status type hotels you will also find a lot of not rich but affluent folks as well so it’s harder to be sure just because you’re there that you’re interacting with a truly wealthy person.
    
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- IronBird@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
  HENRY?
  
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  - CandleTiger@programming.dev ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
    High something Not Rich Yet — people who have a shit-ton of income but blow it all on whatever instead of hoarding it properly
    
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- corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
  
  Their house will be nicer than average, probably not crazy, but just a lot more than a typical person would have.
  
  I hear Michael Bublé lives in a modest house he inherited, and he’s a great neighbour. But he seems as un-Hollywood as people can be, so he may be a bad example.
  
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ExtremeDullard@piefed.social ⁨16⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
Wealthy people don’t mingle with the rest of us. They literally live in a totally different world, and you ain’t invited unless you can clean their toilet or give them massages on a private Caribbean islands and shut your trap.

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- truthfultemporarily@feddit.org ⁨13⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
  There is a flipside here as well which is that when you’re wealthy everyone constantly asks you for money. You start doubting that any social interaction is genuine. Is this person hanging out with you because they like you or because they want your money?
  
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  - ExtremeDullard@piefed.social ⁨13⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
    Then don’t be ostentatious with your wealth. Don’t advertise it. And if you can’t do that, then maybe don’t get so wealthy.
    
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- BestBouclettes@jlai.lu ⁨14⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
  The real communitarians and separatists
  
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DagwoodIII@piefed.social ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
There’s an app called ‘Rich Kids’

It requires $1,000.00/month fee. People use it just so they can communicate with other rich folks.

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- glimse@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
  I thought you were joking. Fuck, man. Why didn’t I think of that?
  
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  - DagwoodIII@piefed.social ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
    Probably because you don’t know anyone who would pay for something like that.
    
    You have to spend time around rich people to come up with an idea like that.
    
    Epstein got a job at an exclusive private school. He was ’only’ a teacher’ but it gave him access to the ultra wealthy.
    
    Ronald Reagan did the same. He was a mid-level actor who got a gig as a spokesman for a giant corporation. He made sure he was always the poorest guy in the room. People began to offer him stock tips and cut him in for a tiny percentage of multi-million dollar deals.
    
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FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world ⁨13⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
codewords like “skiing”

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- starlinguk@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
  Where I live in Germany, skiing is a middle class activity.
  
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  - markz@suppo.fi ⁨10⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
    Finland, and same. Skiing during winter is about as normal as hiking during summer.
    
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  - XeroxCool@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
    I’ve been seeing this year that the cost of a flight from the US to France, mountain ticket for a week in the Alps, and lodging there is cheaper than staying domestic and skiing/lodging in the Rockies for the same time. The majority of US residents would still have to fly to the Rockies anyway. I didn’t verify which exact mountains or level of lodging as I don’t know how, but, presumably, whatever is in the Alps is nicer than the Rockies offerings for the price.
    
    To clarify, skiing is accessible to middle class, but when it’s a personality, it’s a signal of being very comfortably middle class at the least.
    
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  - FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world ⁨6⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
    That makes sense. For Europeans. For british and americans it’s the hallmark of upper class, as are pursuing sports like mountain biking or horse riding. When 2 or more people like that want you gone from a conversation, they’ll start talking about mountain biking or skiing together.
    
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RedstoneValley@sh.itjust.works ⁨12⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
If we’re not talking about the super rich, because there is only a few dozen of them, and they have their own parallel universe… it’s usually mannerisms, language clues (in articulation and content), but of course also signals like expensive clothing and accessories. Also the places where they meet. This opens the door for all kinds of grifters who emulate behaviour and style to get into those circles. Jeffrey Epstein is an (in)famous example for this.

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- exasperation@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
  There are about 2700 billionaires in the world. There are probably about 10,000 centimillionaires in the U.S. alone.
  
  Especially if you include family members, it’s not just a few dozen.
  
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- starlinguk@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
  My grandma was very wealthy. She wore tweeds to death. If she’d still been alive she’d have looked down on people showing off their wealth with clothing and accessories.
  
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Zwuzelmaus@feddit.org ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

only wanted to be friends with other wealthy people

Never go out to public places. Never go alone anywhere. Meet people mostly at private places with invitations, or maybe for example at charity events where you pay 5 figures just to get inside.

and wanted their kids to only date and marry people from other wealthy families?

Have your kids at private schools and the most expensive universities.

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Broiled_Tofu@lemmy.zip ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
The $90 Lacoste T Shirt 😄

The ultimate if you know, you know “dog whistle” for the Rich.

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- IronBird@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
  bougie rich clothes is generally a good tell, but there are also plenty of poor people who buy expensive clothes as a “status” item.
  
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ComradePenguin@lemmy.ml ⁨9⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
Read about cultural capital. The rich are nonchalant towards things that others have to adopt or learn. They are “naturally” adapted to it. Which means that they haven’t learned french, they absorbed it by living in France for some years. So they act as if it is nothing, it is just something they just do and know. They can easily spot someone who is striving to be one of them.

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Kolanaki@pawb.social ⁨18⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
They meet up on Epstien’s island.

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SeaSgt@lemmy.zip ⁨13⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
They sniff each other’s butts

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searabbit@piefed.social ⁨16⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
People generally hang out with other people of their general socioeconomic class, so it doesn’t take much guesswork. Usually, they just have nothing in common with poorer people (not the literal poors, upper middle class is poor to them), don’t go to the same places that poorer people go to, and unfortunately, poorer people generally tend to be less attractive than rich people due to lack of access to cosmetic care. The cosmetic care includes skincare, dental work, and I’ve even seen growth hormones as soon as elementary school.

One last point, multimillionaire and billionaire circles are extremely small because, as you can imagine, there’s not that many of them! They tend to know way too much about each other, so if you do happen to be poorer and run in their circles, they’ll either know and/or you’re smart enough to be playing their game.

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- spectrums_coherence@piefed.social ⁨10⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
  
  poorer people generally tend to be less attractive than rich people due to lack of access to cosmetic care.
  
  Sorry, but why is every single rich old person I see on TV literally looks like goul. .
  
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Tollana1234567@lemmy.today ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
usually at expensive events which are privates, like price per plate stuff.

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plyth@feddit.org ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago
If there us a apeck of avocado toast on your shirt they know that you are part of the club.

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