Submitted 3 months ago by ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.org to showerthoughts@lemmy.world
Sure to annoy IT people but those just need a line of text while the rest of the screen is free real estate for Micro$oft! Public BSODs tend to go viral too.
“Your computer might be fucked or whatever. Maybe do some shit about it. Brought to you by Carl’s Jr. We love you.”
Don’t forget Brawndo, it’s what computers crave.
“You seem to have no idea what this screen means. You might be interested in McAfee.”
Carl’s Jr has determined you are unfit to operate a computer. Your data is now the sole property of Carl’s Jr. Carl’s Jr: Fuck you! I’m eating.
Brought to you by
Carl’s JrCOSTCO. We love you.
ftfy
Their most popular page, a goldmine of opportunity.
Too bad bluescreened computers likely won’t report back viewership stats
Microsoft would do anything to keep the statcounting service running more stable than the kernel itself
dear user.
thank you for your report.
please be assured that even in the event of a bsod, windows will still report metrics back to microsoft so long as the system drive is operational for use as temporary storage of that data until the next successful windows boot.
new OOB ad metrics reporting will also be added to intel ime and amd psp in future processors in order to further address your concern.
-microsoft support
I dunno. Kernels can dump the memory pages and whatnot, surely they could throw in which ad got served at the time too. I’m sure someone up at Microsoft is smart enough to figure it out.
I would imagine it stats could be somehow stored and sent off once the problem is resolved
Steve Jobs would have bought that ad space
Alternative universe: In order to pay back Microsoft for saving them from bankruptcy, Apple buys up ad space on Windows BSODs.
I remember back in the day before browsers had much in the way of protection, and ads could do basically whatever they wanted on your computer. I distinctly remember seeing ads back in the 2000s that would go fullscreen and emulate a BSOD, with a number to call a fake Microsoft Support.
They still do this
They can’t show things outside of your browser window, anymore, which is what those ads tried
CrowdStrike incident happened too soon. Could have made serious money…
Imagine the incentives tho. It’s free real estate, but how would they sell it to advertisers? “Here’s some ad space, but we work really hard to make sure users see it as rarely as possible.”
But if they do manage to sell it, the dev team then has this wacky incentive to trigger BSODs often enough to hit revenue targets, but rarely enough that they don’t drive away their user base. As another commenter put it, cynical and absurd, but… I mean, there’s a universe where it could happen… hopefully it’s not this one.
The amount of conspiracy theories would be unreal
Msft could always use it to push Bing or their AI. Microsoft Office? Game pass? Not the most logically sound advertising cause users are likely to be pissed during a bsod but I think I’d bet real money that they focus group it down the line.
we work really hard to make sure users see it as rarely as possible
That’s what Microsoft says but everyone knows people will see a BSOD once in a while. Also, Bing searches that the user gets linked to for errors in various Microsoft software do contain ads too.
Bummer! You have backups, right? Try OneDrive today!
Upgrade to Windows 11 today!
Or
Microsoft Word has periodic automatic saving!
Are some I could see in a dystopian future
Don’t give the motherfuckers ideas.
They are already kinda doing this. The QR code resolves to http://www.windows.com/stopcode, which has a Microsoft 365 ad (who would have guessed?)
They can barely show useful information on that screen, how they can show ads?
For example, the qr code is completely useless - you would expect to send the user to a page that explains the problem or even just search the error string on Bing, but no, it sends to a placeholder page that doesn’t say anything useful
There is no profit motive in making bluescreens more useful.
That’s where the innovation could happen. It could take users to a page that prompts them to download Microsoft Edge for mobile and then does nothing else
Sounds like the perfect place to run ads for Starbucks (or painkillers in countries where you can legally advertise for drugs online).
“Your system is fucked. Scan this code for 15% off! Might as well, it’s gonna be a loooong day. Toodeloo!”
BSOD?
Blue Screen Of Death.
lol, you might. others might.
i haven’t used windows in decades.
Nobody said the “we” means me and you. It might be me and… uh… my family, I guess?
Anyway, don’t tell me you haven’t seen a BSOD or similar on someone else’s computer, or online.
Ah how about GRUB Rescue?
You probably know what a BSOD is
You can go back to the dark place you came from. I’m sure ads on the BSOD are in the works
Don’t give them ideas 🙏
Boozilla@lemmy.world 3 months ago
This is so cynical and absurd I kind of expect it to happen. Late stage capitalism, yay.