What's with the 'Thanks' people?

Submitted ⁨⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨ravulous@lemdro.id⁩ to ⁨nostupidquestions@lemmy.world⁩

Have any of you encountered the folk, typically in a work environment, that whenever they contact anyone, it’s always something along the lines of, “Insert monotone request or statement. Thanks.”

If you do this, or know individuals who do this, what’s the intent behind this style of communication? In my experience, it usually oringiates from individuals who consider themselves a bit of a VIP. They aren’t necessarily bad people, but are usually either trying to skip proper channels for a request, or correcting someone while having no idea what they’re talking about.

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MrJameGumb@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
I think it’s just to be polite. It’s nice to thank people for doing something for you. Would you rather they just aggressively bark orders at you like a drill sergeant?

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Neato@ttrpg.network ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
I’m thanking the person for hearing the request I’m asking of them and/or doing the thing I’m asking them to go.

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- TK420@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  Yeah it’s pretty straight forward, I’m looking for ‘xyz,’ thanks lol
  
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anon_8675309@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
How about, “do it now, bitch!”?

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analwound@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
I started adding thanks to the end of my communications when my work said I wasn’t very nice in my interactions. They wanted me to ask how people are and say thanks have a good day and all the things that have nothing to do with the information I needed. I thought I was just being efficient yet others thought I was rude. I’m also on the spectrum so that may be the issue. Thanks

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- thisisnotgoingwell@programming.dev ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  Being on the spectrum and navigating office politics can be a nightmare. I’m not sure why people want everything to be “nice.” Now I’m dealing with the opposite problem though. I need to set boundaries and be very opinionated. I’ve spent 10 years ish dialing it back and now I need to dial it back up.
  
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  - AmidFuror@kbin.social ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    I guess it's because people like the OP will scrutinize every word and associate some malicious intent to it.
    
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Deceptichum@kbin.social ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
I'm very confused by OP.

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solitaire@infosec.pub ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
What? That’s just a normal way of communicating anything via text in a professional setting. Neutral language, brief, with a generic but appreciative sign off.

usually either trying to skip proper channels for a request, or correcting someone while having no idea what they’re talking about.

I associate this with messages that are informal and overly friendly.

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Anti_Face_Weapon@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
I usually say thanks to either show genuine appreciation or to not sound demanding.

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Talaraine@kbin.social ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
Thanks is a less formal thank you.

Maybe OP thinks that someone is dissing them by being informal?

Dunno

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NJSpradlin@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
I always write emails with these items:

Open with their abbreviated title and last name (not ‘ma’am, ‘sir’, or ‘hey’)

End with a sentence that asks for them to please let me know if they have any further guidance, questions, issues or concerns with the topic of the email

And then follow that with ‘thank you’, for having taken the time to read through my email, address my concerns within the email, or provide me with their feedback.

I do this, in every single email, to ensure that no one accuses me of not using their professional titles/names. To ensure that no one accuses me of not being polite.

I’m smart enough to absolutely throw snark into an email, and wrap it in a bow, but I’ll be damned if they call me out on it, because I put ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ in there and correctly titled the recipient. They can be fucked how they took the very professional and polite email.

Also ‘V/r’ in your signature block is BS, and everyone knows it.
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- andrewta@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  What is v/r?
  
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  - NJSpradlin@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    “Very respectfully” they have signature blocks like this:
    
    V/r
    
    Full name Department Address Cell Etc
    
    When you put ‘v/r’ in your signature block, or write it out in the signature block, we all know it’s part of your signature. You don’t mean it, it’s dumb.
    
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- yokonzo@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  That’s called a compliment sandwich
  
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- thisisnotgoingwell@programming.dev ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  Honestly, I think the nicest thing you can do for people is to make your point quickly and keep it as short as possible.
  
  For peers on collaborative issues:
  
  Hello NJSpradin,
  
  Hope you had an excellent weekend. I’d like to discuss the doohickey problem. I’m leaning towards XYZ, but I’d love to know your thoughts. Let me know when it’s most convenient to meet.
  
  Thanks.
  
  For peers or people that are not doing their job.
  
  Hello NJSpradin,
  
  As discussed, the delivery of the doohickey proposal is needed ASAP. Please make this your priority and let me know if there’s anything you need.
  
  Thanks.
  
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  - NJSpradlin@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    Bullets 2 and 3, the please and thank you portions of my email, is one sentence:
    
    “Please let me know if you have any further guidance, questions or concerns, otherwise thank you.”
    
    It’s pretty brief and doesn’t add too much to the email.
    
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OhmsLawn@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
You get “regards” “best regards” or if we do a lot of work together, " best," from me. I’ll usually express any gratitude on a separate line.

Thank you for all the work you put into this thread, OP!

Regards,

OhmsLawn

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e-five@kbin.run ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
What gets to me is the "Thanks in advance". I might be alone in this, I asked a co-worker and she said it just seemed like normal dialogue, but I interpret that as "You don't have a say in the matter, you will do this, your consent is not needed". Granted, the people who say this to me are my boss or director, so they're right, I don't have a choice. But if I wanted to be reminded of reality, I wouldn't play so many video games.

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Masterblaster@kbin.social ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
OP does not understand how society works

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- simple@lemm.ee ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  This is the no stupid questions community, not the make fun of OP because they asked a stupid question community.
  
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Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
I end every work email with thanks, because if I’m emailing you, it’s probably because I need you to do something. It’s your job to do it, so I assume you will, so thanks in advance for your help.

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InquisitiveApathy@lemm.ee ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
I’m not sure I understand your problem with this. Are you perceiving being asked to do a task as rude or are you just annoyed at being asked at all?

"Insert monotone request or statement. Thanks.” Is just an objective and no fluff way of saying “You need to do this” by a manager or someone tasked with delegating work.

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NegativeLookBehind@kbin.social ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
Sorry about that, thanks

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the_q@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
I read an article about Gen Z communication and one of the things it talked about was the clash between established norms and Gen Z’s unwillingness to follow said norms.

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- amio@kbin.social ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  That one has been a popular rant literally since Ancient Greece, and probably much longer.
  
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- Makeshift@sh.itjust.works ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  That reminds me of a generational difference I heard about where when someone says “Thank you”, the older generation will say “your welcome”, seeing that they did something worth thanking. But the younger generation feels uncomfortable saying “you’re welcome” and says “no problem” instead, implying it was simply an expected thing for them to do.
  
  I’m in the “no problem” generation. And yeah, saying “you’re welcome” really does just feel weird to me.
  
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  - AmidFuror@kbin.social ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    Have you ever done something that was difficult but you wanted to help someone out?
    
    "No problem" implies to me that it was easy or simple. Regardless of difficulty, "you're welcome" means you would do it again.
    
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pikasaurX4@lemm.ee ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
I think I know what you mean, OP, but it seems like most of the comments think you are just complaining about people saying “thanks” at the end of an email, or in general.

So forget email for now. This is an in person thing or instant message. Ending an email, even a short one, with “thanks” is fine and normal. But if you message me “please update that ticket. Thanks.” It has a more aggressive tone than you might have meant. It feels like you aren’t asking and so the “thanks” comes off as fake or even sarcastic. Maybe also a bit dismissive or distracted. Like this isn’t a conversation or even a request. I’m telling you what to do and walking away. It’s a bit terse. If you say “please update that ticket” and I say “sure thing” and then you say “thanks”, the tone is much different. That doesn’t sound bad at all.

Again, email is different. Emails are meant to be send and forget. The thanks at the end can even be read as a “thanks for reading”. I think OP is talking about something different, and I agree it feels bad when someone talks to me that way.

As for your actual question, OP, I can’t say I know why they said it that way, but I’d guess they mean no offense, like most people are saying. It could be a second language thing or they really are too distracted or busy to wait for your reply. They don’t want to get into it, they just want to check off that someone is taking care of that one thing

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211@sopuli.xyz ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
In my language “thanks” and “please” can use the same word, sometimes it spills over into my use of English. Hopefully the tone of voice carries the sincerity of the hopeful-but-not-demanding request anyway, but that’s not available in online communication. Then again, online I usually have time to get my "thank you"s and " please"s in order.

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- Deceptichum@kbin.social ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  It’s the same in English, saying thanks or please doesn’t really matter, the only difference is putting the nice part before or after the request.
  
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MrNesser@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
Had this and it irritates me: Hi can you do the needful thanks

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- adespoton@lemmy.ca ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  That’s so very Indian :)
  
  First time I saw it, I almost replied with “but… you already did?”
  
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  - thisisnotgoingwell@programming.dev ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    “do the needful” feels like you’re being asked to step up and honor your responsibilities. BE A MAN. PAY THE BILLS. DO THE NEEDFUL.
    
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  - MrNesser@lemmy.world ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
    I’ve always assumed it’s the indian to english translation that makes it sound condescending.
    
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BiggestBulb@kbin.run ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
I think I get what you're saying.

I work in a company with a very young workforce, and the few people who do put periods on the end of their sentences and say "thanks" are out-of-the-ordinary. Usually for us, it goes:

Hey {first name},
[Request Here with Emojis Strewn Throughout]. Thank you!
[Signature line]

I think the few "Thanks" we do have are just from an older generation and / or members of HR (whom I am convinced have no soul at all)

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- AmidFuror@kbin.social ⁨10⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago
  "Thanks" is a short form of "Thank you." Maybe it has developed a negative connotation for some because of "K, thanks, bye." But for others it is like saying "morning" instead of "good morning."
  
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