You ever wake up and question, "am i the bad guy"?

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• kindnesskills@literature.cafe ⁨21⁩ ⁨minutes⁩ ago

  Yes, more when going to bed than waking up though.

  Let me introduce you to “I’m The Villain In My Own Story”: youtu.be/UhzN7SfnNeY

  From the excellent (though sometimes emotionally heavy) show Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. It’s by far the best song in the show, but the most relevant.

  And in the artery to that vein, let me present “I’m A Good Person”: youtu.be/O4hh1YhDfbA

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• zz31da@piefed.social ⁨6⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  If you’ve never asked yourself this question you’re doing it wrong

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  • Maiq@piefed.social ⁨2⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    An unexamined life isn’t worth living. ~ So-Crates

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• zebidiah@lemmy.ca ⁨7⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  We all play in the villain in someone’s story…

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• fizzle@quokk.au ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Lemmy seems obsessed with “good people” and “bad people”.

  People are complicated and full of nuance.

  Someone may have done something that wasn’t great for you, but does that make them “the bad guy”?

  More likely their intentions actually pretty vanilla and the outcome was less than ideal due to pretty understandable reasons.

  Yes, there are exceptions but you don’t encounter them often enough to worry about.

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  • lonefighter@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    I think it’s also important to realize that there’s a difference between being hurt and being wronged. Sometimes someone can do something that hurts you but isn’t wrong, morally, ethically, or legally. It might even be the right thing (ie, breaking up a relationship if it just isn’t working out). It might hurt you, but it didn’t wrong you. And then some people wrong you, such as committing crimes against you, being abusive, or shitty to you, and that’s not ok.

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  • ruekk@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Someone may have done something that wasn’t great for you, but does that make them “the bad guy”?

    Yes?

    More likely their intentions actually pretty vanilla and the outcome was less than ideal due to pretty understandable reasons.

    People die from neglect. Should we not punish and rehabilitate those responsible despite whatever their intentions were?

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    • fizzle@quokk.au ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      I didnt say we shouldn’t punish people.

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• whelk@retrolemmy.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨hour⁩ ago

  I don’t know if this counts, but I’ve reflected more on my past recently and realized that sometimes I was kind of a turd. Never egregiously so (I hope) but I was often regarded as the quiet nice kid and I think that led to me believing that and probably overlooking some of my less favorable moments or behaviors that people didn’t see as often. I don’t hate myself now or think I’m the villain or anything like that, it’s just been an interesting slow process of reflection as I’ve gotten older. It’s good to be honest with ourselves and realize everyone has their bad moments. We’re not only who we are on our worst day, but also our best, and all those in between

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• worhui@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Emotional Abuse will get you thinking all sorts of things about yourself, even when there isn’t anything to it.

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• NannerBanner@literature.cafe ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  I answered that question with a yes a few times, and eventually quit my job over it. Much happier now. Self-reflection is good and worth it.

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• Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Right and wrong are not absolutes. The world is not black and white. People of good conscience are always asking themselves if they did right and how could they have been better. Life is not a purity test. The “good people” aren’t without error, mistakes and regrets, sin. They just try overall to do more good for others and our systems than for themselves.

  If you never ask yourself if you are a good person, you most likely aren’t.

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  • Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world ⁨7⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    I always tell people that about parenting. Generally, if you’re worried about not being a good enough parent, you probably are a good parent.

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  • zebidiah@lemmy.ca ⁨7⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Counterpoint, if you question yourself whether your actions make you a “good person” you’re self aware enough to worry about being a" bad person"

    if you were a “bad person,” you probably wouldn’t give a shit in the first place…

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    • Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca ⁨7⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      That’s not a counterpoint. It’s THE point.

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• rants_unnecessarily@piefed.social ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  I did nearly daily untill I got my meds in line.

  Bipolar is no joke.

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• NorthWestWind@lemmy.world ⁨7⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Yes. I’m a bad guy for YouTube because I block their ads and I’ll keep being the bad guy.

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• ArgumentativeMonotheist@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  It’s a thought process worth exploring, and one necessary for self-actualisation. It can’t be examined in an ideological vacuum though: what are your values and how and when have you gone against them? What’s the intensity and periodicity? Are you truly that far away from righteousness (and panicking a little bit in this case is warranted) or are you an overall “decent” person that needs to uhh round out their corners?

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• markz@suppo.fi ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Oh I’ve done a lot wrong

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• thethrilloftime69@feddit.online ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  We all are the bad guy at some point but you always have the opportunity to let that go.

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• FlashMobOfOne@lemmy.world ⁨7⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Absolutely.

  I think this moment happens for everyone, because we don’t always realize how our behaviors affect other people negatively, but it’s a sign of growth and maturity when you hit the point where that level of empathy kicks in.

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• Pudutr0n@lemmy.world ⁨7⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Yes and the answer was yes, and still is on a bad day.

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• Pronell@lemmy.world ⁨6⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  I often think of myself as a fuckup, especially lately as I am unemployed.

  But when I look at my life honestly and with open eyes, I know I am a decent person who has grown and tried to make up for my past wrongdoing.

  And I don’t know that there is much else to ask from anyone except that alone, to continue to try to grow and be better in some ways.

  I can always beat myself up with would’ves and could’ves, but I can’t redo.

  The only chance I have to do things differently is now.

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• sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  I literally am. I’m more on “now what am I gonna do about it”

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• MrJameGumb@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

  Sounds like there’s something you feel guilty about

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