and how do you deflect prying questions about you and limit these rituals to 2 minutes instead of wasting 30 minutes?
asking as somebody who, if not on the spectrum, is socially awkward, likes solitude, boundaries and to be left alone (to do the job)
I still believe none of your answers is going to help me because neurotypical solutions don’t work for me but I have nothing to lose with this question.
makeshiftreaper@lemmy.world 2 days ago
An important thing to remember is that your job represents about a third of your life and almost half of your waking life. People as a species are sociable and want to know more about the people they spend the most time around. A lot of those interactions are not inherently trying to get something from you but are rather people just being interested in the person ls around them
scarabic@lemmy.world 1 day ago
I try to imagine what it must be like for a neurodivergent person who doesn’t value small talk to get through everyday interactions, and here’s what I came up with.
Imagine that everyone else wanted to dance with you for 3 minutes as soon as they saw you. All day people are rushing up to your desk and busting moves and pulling you up out of your chair to dance with them. You just think “wow what is this point of this shit - can you all just calm down and do some work?”
You aren’t a very good dancer and you protest that you don’t want to do this, and no matter what you try everyone is just saddened or offended that you can’t dance. It’s not your fault you can’t, and you don’t see why dancing should even matter.
TranquilTurbulence@lemmy.zip 1 day ago
On top of that, knowing a bit about your colleagues makes it more comfortable to work with them. It will be easier to approach them and ask for help or advice when you need it.
Obviously, everyone isn’t quite that social, so you need to respect the boundaries — your own and theirs. If you can come to an understanding about what can be shared, how much, and when, then you start to see the benefits. The atmosphere becomes more chill, and you’ll have more energy to get stuff done.
Alternatively, you may find out that you don’t want to be around some people, and that’s valuable information too. Some people are toxic, and getting to know them a little bit will help you make more informed decisions in the future. If you never chat with anyone, those toxic people might end up hurting you later.