Break my phone if she ain't

Comments

• gullible@kbin.social ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  “My how you’ve grown!”

  “I’m onto you, grandma.”

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• theodewere@kbin.social ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  keeping her in a cardboard box is probably the right move

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• stoy@lemmy.zip ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Eh, I’ll take it at this point…

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  • tourist@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I’ll happily take a state appointed surveillance gf

    “He’s got a bunch of ebooks for improvised munitions and amphetamine synthesis, but he’s way too fucking stupid and lazy to do anything with it. Please dear god can you take me off this assignment”

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    • Rolando@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      "“Oh God he’s looking at memes again…”

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  • Socsa@sh.itjust.works ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Me, training in counterintelligence my entire life just in case I ever get a date:

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• Pregnenolone@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  How dare she come in to my box???

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  • citrusface@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Mail order bride

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• PP_BOY_@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  This is the truth.

  Only have sex with emb if you want to be am independent, free citizen

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• captainlezbian@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  My girlfriend will be pissed you called her a statist

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• Sabre363@sh.itjust.works ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Damn, even the state doesn’t want me

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• Plantfoodclock@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  “I don’t care who the IRS sends, I’M NOT PAYING TAXES”

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• Valmond@lemmy.mindoki.com ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  But what’s the green thing in her mouth, the frog driving the android?

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• ChrislyBear@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  If a woman showed interest (lolol), I’d unironically be inclined to ask her who she works for…

  There’s no hope for me anymore.

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• MacNCheezus@lemmy.today ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  This, but unironically.

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• PsychedSy@sh.itjust.works ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  But which state?

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  • The_Ferry@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Gaseous I think though solid doesn’t seem like too long of a stretch

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  • Gruntyfish@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Delaware

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  • Blue_Morpho@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    State of indifference

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  • cows_are_underrated@feddit.de ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    From the deep state.

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    • TheDeepState@lemm.ee ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      We can not confirm or deny this allegation at the moment.

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• Slow@lemmy.today ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  And often these women look like Mrs. Puff…

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• therealjcdenton@lemmy.zip ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  I knew it that’s why I only like men

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• prole@sh.itjust.works ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Exterminate all rational thought. It’s the conclusion I have come to.

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