I have no wife and no job, so that’s pretty much every day for me.
I am always prepared to move into this version of life
Submitted 2 days ago by Mickey7@lemmy.world to [deleted]
https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/e779f63a-19d3-42c1-a69b-a81c7c9f1f63.png
Comments
hOrni@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Son_of_Macha@lemmy.cafe 1 day ago
Lotion. Ick. Stop cutting your dick skin off you crazy puritanical people.
DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 1 day ago
This dude thinks it’s better dry
Mickey7@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Why would you not use lotion and risk chafing your cock?
King_Bob_IV@startrek.website 1 day ago
Because actual lube works better?
Macaroni_ninja@lemmy.world 1 day ago
You are not allowed to wear shorts or eat pizza while she is home?
Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 1 day ago
the shorts are for the pornhub.
Kolanaki@pawb.social 1 day ago
The pizza is for the hotel hallway. 😉
Kolanaki@pawb.social 1 day ago
Ewww…
Xbox?
baguettefish@discuss.tchncs.de [bot] 1 day ago
as funny as this comment is, do console wars really need to exist? does brand loyalty and basing your identity on the products you consume need to exist?
luciferofastora@feddit.org 7 minutes ago
No, they don’t.
Microsoft wars on the other hand…
That is also a joke. Don’t base your identity on brands, technologies or corporations; not even on hating them. Base it on values and moral convictions, then judge the rest by them.
EndlessNightmare@reddthat.com 1 day ago
PC or GTFO!
glorkon@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Same here, except I also use the opportunity to cook stuff for myself that my wife doesn’t like. Fuck pizza.
chatokun@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 day ago
Not a romantic partner (obviously) but currently my sister and I are roommates, and when she’s out of town or staying at her boyfriend’s place I make the meals she isn’t really interested in, like Moqueca.
glorkon@lemmy.world 1 day ago
I never heard of Moqueca and googled it, and it does look very delicious!
boonhet@sopuli.xyz 1 day ago
Yeah, like anything containing onions, garlic, bell peppers or other ingredients with too much flavour.
I decided she can be not home permanently. I hope your situation is better lol
EndlessNightmare@reddthat.com 1 day ago
If I couldn’t use onions or garlic, that would be a dealbreaker
glorkon@lemmy.world 1 day ago
I like a good steak. My wife does not like it medium rare, she belongs to those heretics who would shamelessly order it well done (that’s why I never go to steakhouses with her). She also hates spicy food. Or some kinds of traditional German food which I grew up with.
So yeah. Whenever she’s away, it’s usually steak, some spicy Asian dish or Berlin style grilled liver.
cattywampas@midwest.social 1 day ago
Me, except no porn so I’m ravenous for that pussy when she gets back.
Mickey7@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Yeah but what’s you maximum of days to let that load build up before you really need to drain it off
sparky@lemmy.federate.cc 1 day ago
That’s enough internet for me today
aeronmelon@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Just replace everything with a bed.
blimthepixie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 days ago
Where’s the goon cave?
kubica@fedia.io 2 days ago
I don't have white or black nintendos.
realitista@lemmus.org 2 days ago
Only 26? Amateur.
gon@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 days ago
?! And you’re a pro?! A professional gooner?!
realitista@lemmus.org 2 days ago
More than this yokel that’s for sure.
MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip 2 days ago
ArchmageAzor@lemmy.world 1 day ago
This feels like a prime 2018 meme
RaivoKulli@sopuli.xyz 1 day ago
Pretty much lol
vateso5074@lemmy.world 2 days ago
I would never stop as low as that.
…
PS4 and Xbox One are weak, last-gen consoles. I’d use the same PC that I have all the porn tabs open on.
Passerby6497@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Taking a break from your game for a quick wank, like a man of class.
gnutrino@programming.dev 1 day ago
Who said anything about taking a break? I’ve got 2 monitors and 2 hands.
Anissem@lemmy.ml 1 day ago
Fixed it for you