Silence isn’t a crime you know…it’s actually pretty great.
do you think freewill truly exists?
Submitted 10 months ago by Goku@sh.itjust.works to [deleted]
https://sh.itjust.works/pictrs/image/86346738-f24e-4e23-b781-4c7c87afbf08.png
Comments
CrowAirbrush@lemmy.world 10 months ago
SethTaylor@lemmy.world 10 months ago
That sounds great, actually
Novice_Idiot@lemmy.wtf 10 months ago
Nope. Free will is an illusion that we have because we live in a world that’s too complex to predict. We are a product of our circumstance.
Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee 10 months ago
Yes.
SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone 10 months ago
My partner and I have surprisingly little in common when it comes to interests. I like a lot of nerd stuff: homelab, 3d printing, robotics, brewing, welding, woodworking, sci-fi, etc. They like not nerd stuff: copaganda shows, murder porn (podcasts and documentaries), dog training, cooking, etc. I like metal, they like jangly indie, we both like punk. We both love cats.
We also both hate small talk, so we only discuss what we find to be pertinent or interesting. Since we have a lot of individual interests, we actually have a lot to talk about. We just had a really great conversation on using Docker or a VM to circumvent some silly online testing issues.
starman2112@sh.itjust.works 10 months ago
Anyone down for a sustained meaningful relationship? I’d really like to discuss the comparisons and contrasts between Happy Meal toys and gambling
DrunkAnRoot@sh.itjust.works 10 months ago
no because you pay for the food not the toy the toy is just a bonus thats free
Duamerthrax@lemmy.world 10 months ago
No, because you can just ask and pay for the one you want.
starman2112@sh.itjust.works 10 months ago
That was basically my exact response when someone made the comparison. Ostensibly though, the idea is that you get a random result in your happy meal, and it’s designed to encourage you to buy more to collect them all. If the only difference is in the reality of being able to essentially bribe the House, then I don’t see a meaningful distinction.
I guess we’re dating now. Lemme know next time you’re in Kansas so we can catch a movie or something
ynthrepic@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Daily life is what daily life is all about.
I do think I’d potentially be happier with a partner who I could speak philosophy and politics with, but if we couldn’t also function simply navigating running a household and raising our family, then we really couldn’t be anything more than friends with benefits long term. Not that that would be a bad thing. It just depends on how you want to move your life.
Plesiohedron@lemmy.cafe 10 months ago
I think it half-exists. I speak from a deep inspection of will performed while meditating.
There is a spark of energy that arises from my mysterious depths, that preceeds choice. I dunno where it comes from. Like I said, mysterious depths.
The spark enters this world and takes its form from it. Becomes a choice. Taking form from formlessness like breath blown into a flute. Or a player’s will injected into a videogame.
ynthrepic@lemmy.world 10 months ago
That “spark” is whatever consciousness is in the end I think. Everything else is subject to direct inspection and can be found to be deterministic or emergent, not actually subject to any kind of “will”. I speak also from insights gained while meditating (or doing psychedelics 🤗)
RedAggroBest@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Is or is not talking about how your days went considered small talk? I literally don’t know now. I’d say it’s small talk.
Small talk is a way to gauge someone’s mood before going for the bigger discussions
lennivelkant@discuss.tchncs.de 10 months ago
If a colleague asks me “Hi, how’re you doing?” it’s small talk and I’ll respond something like “Oh you know, the usual.” If my partner asks me “Hi, how was your day?” it’s a genuine question and I will respond “That fucking dickhead at work that always plays nice and personable came around with another set of “urgent” requests and no fucking clue what he’s actually asking for, whether it’s possible or why I told him last week it isn’t.”
The difference is in how serious I take the question.
RedAggroBest@lemmy.world 9 months ago
I think that’s still small talk either way tho? The fact that you launch into some part of your day doesn’t change that it’s gauging your mood on her end. You could just as easily answered: “Snoozefest, how about your day?” or “Nightmarish headache from start to end, hold me”. See how these are all logical answers that would (I hope) evoke a different response from your partner?
milicent_bystandr@lemm.ee 10 months ago
I think so? Perhaps it’s small talk as long as it remains small. “Hi honey, what did you find out about the coefficient of friction in the graviton chamber after interviewing that nazi scientist, and does it mean we have to uproot our family and travel to a new country again?” is probably not small talk, unless it’s answered by, “oh, yeah, friction’s quite big, it’s all fine; can I have some toast?”
minorkeys@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Need for small talk suggests the contents of your thoughts revolves around topics and depth of thought suitable for small talk, I wish you the best in finding someone similar who can appreciate its value to your life. I’ll be elsewhere and hope you wish me the same luck.
milicent_bystandr@lemm.ee 10 months ago
I’m afraid you’ve missed the point. Smalltalk is about maintaining and strengthening relationship, which involves knowing about each others’ lives and feelings. And it does double duty: taking the time to ask and listen is a way to express that the other person is important enough to you - i.e. to express love.
It’s not the only way, and many of us don’t do well at smalltalk, but it’s a valuable way. And,
your thoughts revolves around topics and depth of thought suitable for small talk
Indeed! It means your thoughts have time for the other person’s life and feelings.
minorkeys@lemmy.world 10 months ago
For many, small talk does not strengthen or maintain a relationship. It is something that works for some people. Others endure it for the sake of the one who does but it doesn’t hold the same role for them and is not a necessity to have a loving and healthy relationship for everyone. Just as we express and receive love differently, small talk doesn’t serve the same role in everyone’s life. If it does for you, that’s great, hopefully you’re getting what you need.
As for the double duty, that is true of all communication, whether small or not. As noted above, it may be an expression of love for some people, but it’s far from universal.
Not everyone finds the smaller, and often repetitive, experiences of their day to be important or valuable and people are perfectly capable of having time for the other person’s life and feelings without the focus being those topics or experiences.
It sounds like you value smalltalk in your life but may not accept that it isn’t as widespread as you seem to imply. I don’t doubt it does what you claim for yourself and others you know.
CalipherJones@lemmy.world 10 months ago
In this moment you are euphoric.
curiousaur@reddthat.com 10 months ago
Well do you?
m3t00@lemmy.world 10 months ago
got a neighbor can’t control his motor mouth. last time he came to my door i said ‘what the fuck do you want’ and closed/locked the door. not too bright. he yelled through the door, ‘I only want to talk’. hahaha fuck off
tiramichu@lemm.ee 10 months ago
Tough one. I’d probably end up being the person who just kept politely listening while trying to shut down the conversation amicably like “well anyway” and “I must get cooking dinner now” and “my plants need moisturising” or something.
Neighbours are extremely high on the list of people I want to avoid pissing off, because a neighbour with a grudge against you could be an absolute nightmare (especially when you live in a townhouse and share walls)
m3t00@lemmy.world 9 months ago
let him in once. talked non-stop for nearly 2 hours. unstable. out.
Cocopanda@lemmy.world 10 months ago
No. Because the people in power use their influence to torture everyone else.
akademy@lemm.ee 10 months ago
So, you just HAVE to talk?
Do you hate silence?
milicent_bystandr@lemm.ee 10 months ago
andybytes@programming.dev 10 months ago
Shhhhhhh…
DamienGramatacus@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Asking someone you love “How was your day?” is a meaningful question. Small talk is bullshit time wasting between randos or acquaintances.
milicent_bystandr@lemm.ee 10 months ago
“Lovely weather today, isn’t it?”
“Yeah, makes me feel like picnics,”
is expressing feelings to each other, affirming a shared worldview in which sunny weather is good, and affirming the value of each others’ feelings and potential plans.
Just because the real meaning is hidden, doesn’t negate the value.
DamienGramatacus@lemmy.world 10 months ago
That’s fair. Sometimes I can be a bit grumpy with randos.
Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 10 months ago
how do people who like small talk plan on being in sustained meaningful relationships what are you gonna do “hi honey nice weather we’re having huh?”
my plan is to be too busy kissing my partner at all times to say anything
milicent_bystandr@lemm.ee 10 months ago
How Shakespearian. “Stop his mouth with a kiss.”
“And another kiss.”
“Keep going! More kisses, least he open his mouth and opine on the weather.”
Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 9 months ago
a year in the horror dawns upon you
you have trained your partner to engage in small talk to get kissed
supersquirrel@sopuli.xyz 10 months ago
fyi do not about whether women have freewill to your conservative husband or it will hurt their feelings and some of their hearts have grown so tiny it might crush their old self in a single blow.
Cocopanda@lemmy.world 10 months ago
test
psmgx@lemmy.world 10 months ago
ITT we ask the autistic to self identify
Tattorack@lemmy.world 10 months ago
But that would be great! Let’s start an awesome exploration of a very existential topic. Certainly better and more interesting that talking about shopping.
milicent_bystandr@lemm.ee 10 months ago
Well, but if the other person did some shopping, do you care how it went? They might.
“How was the shopping?”
“Ugh, this idiot cut me off in the aisles so many times, I feel so frustrated.”
“Yeah, I know what you mean. Like, does his existence even matter? Perhaps he’s a figment of our collective imagination. It’s so maddening to think your own brain is creating fictions that cut you off in the aisle.”
“I know, right? It made me wonder what if I’m the figment in his imagination! It’s such a depressing thought. I need a hug.”
*hug*
minorkeys@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Only for those who spend time engaged with existential topics rather than shopping though.
doingthestuff@lemy.lol 10 months ago
My speech is deep. My beard is neck.
FourWaveforms@lemm.ee 10 months ago
after you get through all the asking each other stuff to get to know each other’s histories etc phase, it’s okay to just not talk all the time
milicent_bystandr@lemm.ee 10 months ago
It’s not just histories and facts, though. Sure, you don’t have to talk all the time, but sharing feelings and connection, in a relaxing way, through small talk, helps maintain and build that connection. More important for some people than others.
hedge_lord@lemmy.world 10 months ago
I REFRAIN FROM THE PRACTICE OF UTILIZING MINISCULE SPEECH. EACH AND EVERY INSTANCE OF MY EXPRESSION IS VAST AND VERBOSE AND MAXIMAL.
Opisek@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Honestly yes that’s kind of what I do.
genevieve@lemmy.blahaj.zone 10 months ago
Spouse and I ponder the mysteries of life and the universe while we’re cuddling.
milicent_bystandr@lemm.ee 10 months ago
Sounds pretty good :-)
EvolvedTurtle@lemmy.world 10 months ago
I mean You can hate small talk with strangers and co workers but still enjoy small talk with your partner
milicent_bystandr@lemm.ee 10 months ago
“How’s the weather, Bob?”
“Please! My wife asks me that in the bedroom! Not you, here, at the water cooler.”
HelixDab2@lemm.ee 10 months ago
No. Last I knew, PET (?) scans appear to indicate that decisions are reached by your unconscious mind before they’re made by your conscious mind; the implication is that what you believe is you making a choice is actually you rationalizing a choice that’s been made through processes that you can’t directly see or affect. IF that’s correct, then people are quite deterministic, as long as you know all of the inputs.
But on a practical, day-to-day basis, calling it ‘free will’ is a convenient fiction or shorthand. While free will may not exist, we largely believe that it does, and our perception of that in turn shapes our perception of reality. So it ends up not really mattering, strictly speaking.
milicent_bystandr@lemm.ee 10 months ago
I can definitely take a ‘decision’ that’s arrived from the subconscious, analyse it consciously, and accept, modify or reject it. I’m aware many people don’t do that so much. So I think the results of those scans might be just a small part of the picture of what’s going on with consciousness and will.
HelixDab2@lemm.ee 10 months ago
You think you’re doing that. But are you? Or are things happening below the threshold of your consciousness, and your conscious brain thinks that it’s the one running the show? Consciousness would be like the toddler with the toy steering wheel that thinks it’s driving the car.
JcbAzPx@lemmy.world 10 months ago
You think that we have no affect on our own unconscious mind?
HelixDab2@lemm.ee 10 months ago
If the unconscious mind is making the decisions prior to cognition about the thing, how could our will alone affect it? It seems more likely that things outside of our direct control are changing how we are acting, and then the conscious part of ourselves creates the reason that we acted in a specific way.
praxis_jack@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Yes.
menas@lemmy.wtf 10 months ago
No I think not. But the feeling of freewill do exist and seems universal. So if we have a fact based approach, it does not change much. I think there it a lot of proof that freewill is at least very weak compare to social determinism.