Less inhibitions.
Comment on I love bpd girls
Cruxifux@feddit.nl 7 months ago
The crazy girls being better at sex thing always confused me. I vaguely understand that correlation but like… it holds so true. What is it about bpd that makes you bang so good?
lightnsfw@reddthat.com 7 months ago
OldChicoAle@lemmy.world 7 months ago
As a gay man, I had some of the best sex with a man that turned out to be a little cray cray. His place was immaculate but he freaked out on me after one hookup. Granted, I did cancel our second date, but no need to get weird about it. Blocked. Never driving around his place again either.
Cruxifux@feddit.nl 7 months ago
Yeah I dated a girl for 3 years that was amazing sex. Not worth the emotional abuse though.
Also I guess I shouldn’t have prefaced this with just women being like this. I’ve heard the same about men.
rabber@lemmy.ca 7 months ago
was she honest about her issues or did she manipulate you?
Cruxifux@feddit.nl 7 months ago
She was not honest and was not working on it. I was just hopeful it would magically get better. Because I’m stupid and figured it had to if I just kept working on it and being a good boyfriend. But I know now there wasn’t much I could do.
Kolanaki@pawb.social 7 months ago
Passion, like everything else, is cranked up to 11?
PrettyFlyForAFatGuy@feddit.uk 7 months ago
Pretty much. I had a partner with BPD for almost four years. It was extremely intense.
The sex was fantastic but fucking hell was it tough walking on eggshells constantly
rabber@lemmy.ca 7 months ago
The good times are especially good and the bad times are especially bad, currently dating one and confused a lot of the time
MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip 7 months ago
Can’t it be kept in check with meds?
rami@ani.social 7 months ago
It’s a trauma disorder so medication is really only fighting the symptoms. It can be healed tho. Not everyone with BPD projects it outwardly either and not all that do are abusive.
rabber@lemmy.ca 7 months ago
The flipside is the meds will numb the qualities that make such people so special in the first place
MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip 7 months ago
Which is what they suffer from.
ivanafterall@lemmy.world 7 months ago
Yes, you should run. It probably doesn’t do you any good to tell you this now, as I know how intoxicating those times can be, but you should run. I was in exactly this situation. Also it WILL be hard to find equivalent sex in the future. Just try not to think too much about the fact that you might have now peaked in that regard.
If you get to the point that you want some helpful answers, consider reading Attached by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller. I read it one night, it was so helpful back in the day. See if maybe it touches any sensitive areas.
rabber@lemmy.ca 7 months ago
It’s not just the sex that’s the best though. Nobody’s ever been this nice to me before just in general. I really don’t want to run :(
I’ll check that book thx
TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 7 months ago
this is classic abuse victim rationalization.
Just because she treats you less like shit than other people in the past have, doesn’t mean she still isn’t treating you like shit.
ivanafterall@lemmy.world 7 months ago
Same here. She really, really loved me, in her way, and I love(d) her. Closest I’ve had yet to something long-term sustainable. But was it tho? She compared me to Jesus and called me a sex god. She drew my penis as art. Said I looked and smelled like a French king (it was well-intentioned). Really took an interest in my hobbies–to the point that they became her hobbies and it became a lot. We were really, really close. I ended up having to call the police on her when she finally confessed to the cheating and it ended. She shaved her head and moved to Indonesia. As with the highs, so with the lows.
MeatPilot@lemmy.world 7 months ago
One explanation for someone who is bipolar. Hypomania can express as hypersexual.
My wife and past girlfriends have experienced this with me and to be honest it’s fun for the first hour but having a throbbing boner and inability to satisfy the urge stops being fun for both parties involved. Also makes woman feel horribly inadequate that they can’t get a man to cum. Add to it I try to do all sorts of uncomfortable things to us both to just nut.
I’m sure that the bipolar woman go through what I have gone through it’s like eating nonstop and still being hungry even though your stomach is about to burst. You feel like a disgusting slob with every bite but can’t put the food down. All you crave is the sloppiest and nastiest food because anything healthy just doesn’t get you there. The regret afterwards is next level.
Not trying to be a downer, but you did ask.
sober_monk@lemmy.world 7 months ago
There’s also the fun part of dialling in your medication to find the balance between being an overclocked sex machine and a walking limp noodle!
MycelialMass@lemmy.world 7 months ago
Dang dude
Pacattack57@lemmy.world 7 months ago
I’ve never heard a better explanation for this phenomena. Appreciate the insight.
Jerkface@lemmy.world 7 months ago
Sensation seeking, emotional intensity, and a certain lack of inhibition.
mic_check_one_two@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 months ago
The mania also helps. Bipolar isn’t just a happy-sad thing. The manic phase is categorized in the same group as schizoaffective disorders. Some of the most common symptoms of mania are hyper sexuality and feeling invincible. Imagine being absolutely insatiable even while doing it. So you keep going harder and harder, trying to find something to sate the urge. And the entire time, you’re delusional to the point of thinking nothing will hurt you. If you’re a manic girl who just brought home a random hookup, he’s about to get sex so hard his entire genetic line will be impressed.
agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works 7 months ago
Passion.
kadaverin0@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 months ago
From personsl experience: it’s not worth it.
Swap pronouns were applicable.
You’ll be so exhausted from her meltdowns, manipulation, and the constant repairs (literal and figurative) from her poor life choices that you won’t have the time or energy for sex. Then she’ll cheat on you with your gross scumbag neighbor who was old enough to be her father because she jumped to the conclusion that you did’t want her anymore and she wanted revenge.
She’ll then proceed to run off with one your friends. But not before explaining how it’s probably just temporary and the relationship will be stronger than ever when she comes back. So stay single. Oh, can you keep her cat for now? He doesn’t have room in his parent’s apartment that she’s moving into the day after fucking him for the first time.
My early 20s were trash. She ended up completing suicide a week before my wedding in 2012. Myself, I was so fucked up by that relationship I now live with chronic anhedonia and alexithymia. It literally broke my brain.
proceduralnightshade@lemmy.ml 7 months ago
skill issue
kadaverin0@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 months ago
This situation lead to me attempting suicide.
proceduralnightshade@lemmy.ml 7 months ago
You still seem deeply traumatized. The way you speak about your experience is something that reminds me of myself and other people’s communication with unprocessed traumatic experiences.
You experience is valid, but the way you generalize and demonize BPD/mentally ill women is not. You can’t expect to get any pity or validation by randomly trauma dumping in a shitposting community. Getting angry and generalizing is often the first step towards healing, but… This is not the place to do it.