Comment

I’m scared to post this because people will interpret it as me being misogynistic. And that fact, IMO, is the biggest problem that men face. We’re not allowed by society to be victims.

source

Sort:hotnew top

surewhynotlem@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
That’s why I’m a feminist. They understand everyone suffers under the patriarchy. Especially men who are forbidden to show emotion.

source
- tias@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  Under some older meaning of feminist sure, but 90% of the people who claim to be feminist these days think of it solely as giving women more privilege, and any discussion of men’s issues is considered anti-feminist. Whatever meaning of equality that there used to be is all but lost.
  
  source
  - DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    You’d get called a misogynist because you are a misogynist.
    
    source
    Tartas1995@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    That comment was already made and most symbols mean multiple things. A German user and a Japanese user will have very different interpretations of a swastika. Whose Interpretation is correct, is depending on the situation. If you think the swastika on the tourist map in Japan stands for Nazism, you are wrong. If you think the swastika on a wall in Germany stands for good fortune, you are most probably wrong.
    
    source
    -> View More Comments
  - surewhynotlem@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    Did you know that 74% of statistics are made up on the spot?
    
    How many feminist podcasts do you consume, and when did you notice the change?
    
    source
    tias@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    I’m not talking about feminists who actually know their stuff (such as most - but not all - who make podcasts on the subject). Those are niche subcultures. I’m talking about the self-proclaimed feminists on social media like TikTok, Instagram, or the comment sections on Reddit and Facebook. The people that the general public comes in contact with and who shape the meaning of our language. Your attempt at gatekeeping kind of underscores my point.
    
    source
- drunkpostdisaster@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  I’ve very rarely see that from feminist circles. And even then it feels like we can only have the emotions they want us to have and not the ones we do have.
  
  source
  - dermanus@lemmy.ca ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    I’ve had the same experience. Or if you do hear about it, it’s reluctant and only in relation to how it affects women.
    
    I’m fine with women having their own advocacy group, I don’t think they’re equipped to take on men too.
    
    source
    drunkpostdisaster@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    And whenever there is a push for a male advocacy group it gets labeled as some incel shit. Which attracts alt right types and suddenly it’s yet another pro republican group.
    
    Men can’t have advocacy groups.
    
    source
    MITM0@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    Buddy they oppose & damage & hijack men’s issues (E.g: Conscription & False allegations)
    
    source
  - surewhynotlem@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    What emotions do you have that you think you can’t?
    
    You’re allowed to have anger. But if you’re like many, you conflate the anger feeling with the shouting/punching/violent actions. Toxic actions are bad, but the feelings are valid and ok. Need to find a proper way to express those emotions.
    
    source
- Allero@lemmy.today ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  I don’t like being associated with feminism for a single reason - not everyone agrees that both women and men suffer, and the blame is often shifted on men. Besides, it is originally about women fighting for their rights, not men, and at any point in time women can note that it’s for the women and about women, effectively shaking off the very men who promoted it.
  
  We can do better by building a wider antisexist community. At the end of the day, all we want, as long as we act in good faith, is for everyone to be equal in their rights and opportunities. Women face sexism. Men face sexism. Some of it stems from patriarchy, some of it might come from other angles. We should come together not under the banner of feminism, not under the banner of masculism, but from the neutral ground if we ever hope to achieve a society that treats men and women as equals.
  
  source
  - LanguageIsCool@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    
    I don’t like being associated with anti-racism for a single reason - not everyone agrees that both black and white people suffer, and the blame is often shifted on white people as “carriers of systemic racism”. Besides, it is originally about black people fighting for their rights, not white people, and at any point in time black people can note that it’s for and about black people, effectively shaking off the very white people who promoted it - and to some degree, they will be correct.
    
    We can do better by building a wider anti-racist community. At the end of the day, all we want, as long as we act in good faith, is for everyone to be equal in their rights and opportunities. Black people face racism. White people face racism. Some of it stems from systemic racism, some of it might come from other angles. We should come together not under the banner of pro-black, not under the banner of pro-white, but from the neutral ground if we ever hope to achieve a society that treats #AllLives as equals.
    
    This is how these posts come across to me.
    
    There’s a power imbalance. Feminism is about bringing women up and redistributing the power.
    
    Men should be able to talk about their issues. And I feel like they usually are. It’s not a problem.
    
    It’s a problem when it’s done to hijack a conversation about women. Or when it’s done without awareness of the history of the power imbalance.
    
    A lot of it isn’t to be taken personally and if it is, I think that says something about you. When I hear blame and anger towards privileged groups that I’m a part of, even if I suffer too, my gut reaction is never “but…” I understand that it’s a reaction to the power, the history, and the general picture.
    
    source
    Allero@lemmy.today ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    The problem is in your first remake of the quote.
    
    I don’t like being associated with anti-racism…
    
    I support antisexism. You just equated feminism and antisexism, and the latter is a bigger category than the former.
    
    Nothing wrong with feminism as a fight for women’s rights, but looking at mens’ problems through the prism of feminism is the same as looking at racism against whites through the prism of BLM, or apples through bananas. That’s simply the wrong tool.
    
    There is feminism - about women. There is masculism (which is currently heavily discredited by patriarchal shitheads, but originally comes from the same place of equality as feminism) - about men. There are also nonbinaries fighting for their place in the world. And there is antisexism combining them all.
    
    source
    -> View More Comments
    hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    Image Either you’re a feminist or you’re a misogynist, it’s simple.
    
    source
    -> View More Comments
    captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    
    It’s a problem when it’s done to hijack a conversation about women.
    
    You’re talking about feminism in a thread started about men’s mental health.
    
    Dearest Kettle,
    
    I write to you on this auspicious occasion to bring into your awareness a matter which has consumed my attention as of late. It seems you bear a certain patina of the very darkest of colors, one might even go so far as to call you “black.”
    
    Eternally yours,
    
    Pot
    
    source
    -> View More Comments
  - surewhynotlem@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    No true Scotsman, amirite?
    
    Antisexism would be great. I’m not sure that it won’t easily be coopted by toxic feminist or incels. But I’d join
    
    source
    Allero@lemmy.today ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    It kinda exists, but I feel it is drowned in the era of outrage-based media.
    
    And yes, it is often appropriated by various actors, even though the premise couldn’t be clearer.
    
    source
dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
I agree. It’s kind of a tightrope these days. As a white, cis, hereto, middle-aged, male, I pretty much clock as the poster-child for privilege. I am palpably aware that crying loudly for any support might just come off as tasteless, or even insensitive in the wrong group.

Yet, a lot of our social ills these days look an awful lot like mental illness, which is poorly compensated for through evil, perpetrated by people that resemble this description. Zero social support means you just listen to Joe Rogan instead, while projecting trauma as hate.

This poster/meme might work better if it aimed for equality and that it doesn’t exclude anyone. Or maybe if it had a quote from research or some person of note about the silent epidemic that is men’s mental/social health issues.

source
- drunkpostdisaster@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  So can the meto movement include male victims now?
  
  source
- spankmonkey@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  
  This poster/meme might work better if it aimed for equality and that it doesn’t exclude anyone.
  
  Who does it exclude?
  
  source
  - dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    Technically, everyone that doesn’t identify as “men”. But it’s done in the abstract, negative space of the message by not saying it. Subtle, but without clarifying things, it’s left open to this interpretation.
    
    source
    spankmonkey@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    Do you also complain that gay pride and black history month aren’t inclusive of everyone?
    
    source
    -> View More Comments
    hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    It isn’t inclusive of everyone because it is about a specific group. I’m getting ‘all lives matter’ vibes from your comment.
    
    source
    -> View More Comments
kilgore_trout@feddit.it ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Stay strong, brother. You are not alone

source