Hossenfeffer

@Hossenfeffer@feddit.uk

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Spicy spicy⁩ ⁨⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago⁩:

  “Cunt” as a descriptive term has gotten a lot of flak for the last couple decades, mostly by the bleeders that wear their hearts on their sleeves. The word itself is not so much an insulting denigration as it is a succinct label. And we all use labels for everything and everybody

  I use it for you!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨The worst Italian mobster names you can think of⁩ ⁨⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago⁩:

  Snitch “Tattle Tale” Tagliatelle
  Al Capone (no relation)
  Barry Shitpeas
  Zabaglione Zamboni

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Great Tits⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  Your shitty English is infinitely better than my (I’m guessing) shitty Danish.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Great Tits⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  I just had a vision of a deer sitting at a table in a French bistro, about to take a bite out of a sparrow impaled on a fork in one hoof and a Haynes manual for a Triumph Stag in the other. Made me laugh.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Great Tits⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  Nothing shocks me after seeing the video of a deer eating a sparrow and reading a non fiction book

  I liked it more when I thought the sentence stopped here.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Meta: Shit post on shitpost⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  My wife once dropped a noxious stench, in a National Trust gift shop, that was so bad that a little old lady blamed her dog.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Muad'Dib Dib Dib⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  “There’s a fish worm in the percolator!”

  [Click the link if you’re a Twin Peaks fan and have always wondered about the fish in the percolator!]

• Hammond!feddit.uk ↗
  Submitted ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩ | ⁨6⁩ ⁨comments⁩
• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Muad'Dib Dib Dib⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Ok. Maybe one mistake was made.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Muad'Dib Dib Dib⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  We must negate the machines-that-think!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Muad'Dib Dib Dib⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Ooh, that would have been even better.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Muad'Dib Dib Dib⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  No mistakes were made here.

• Muad'Dib Dib Dibfeddit.uk ↗
  Submitted ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩ | ⁨58⁩ ⁨comments⁩
• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨I don't have money to pay premium to not see ads. What in the world makes you think that I have money to buy what you are advertising me?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  What you can, or cannot afford is irrelevant. You’re a pair of eyeballs and they’re paid for eyeballs.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Do you have a vegan option?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  “Christ, no, I’ve aleady got two!”

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Do you have a vegan option?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  And the self-righteousness is enough to make me lose my appetite.

  So… it works then?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨GTA6 is gonna be crazy 🔥⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  I was a simpler chap.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨GTA6 is gonna be crazy 🔥⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  Sounds great outside your head too. Have some Reddit gold!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Breaking: BAD⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  I felt breaking bad would have been better as 3 seasons instead of 5. The middle just dragged on too long.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨They're calling it the Trump Laptop. Highest quality. So affordable. We're making technology great again, folks.⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Windows 3.11 for the win!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨oldest shitpost yet.⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  We’ve all done a ‘butthole’ imprint at an office party…

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨BYD Reveals the ‘World’s Longest-Range EV’ as American Auto Industry Struggles to Keep Pace⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  644 miles? But what if I need to drive 650 miles once a decade? Electric cars are just a stoopid fad.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Just one more square bro⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  I fucking love this. I mean, I absolutely hate that this is the optimal way to pack 17 squares into a larger square such that the size of the larger square is minimised.

  There’s a brain echo in here.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Trump: 'I am not happy with the UK'⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  The UK: ‘We’re not happy with the artificially tanned malignant tumour’

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨McDonald’s CEO’s awkward taste test sparks mocking online: ‘His aura screams kale salad’⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Woopise. Thanks, I’ll change it. Though ‘in jest’ does seem appropriate.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨McDonald’s CEO’s awkward taste test sparks mocking online: ‘His aura screams kale salad’⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Transcript:

  “Hello fellow humans. I shall soon commence sensory analysis of this new human food product. I SHALL INJEST THIS FOR MY LUNCHEON. Let us scrutinise the product. It has dimensions which impress me hugely. It has constituent components. I can name some of them. I am inexperienced in eating this kind of human food product so must first determine an effective strategem for inserting it in my face hole. Minimally shall be my approach. I shall now appear to consume a small sample. Yes, indeed that is a human food product! Only McDonalds could produce a distinctive human food product like this.”

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨bold words⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Lol at all these incorrect answers. “Kill 'em all” is the only sensible response.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Game over⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  I’m not saying soups aren’t nice. But if you offer me, eg, a French Onion Soup (one of the greatest soups there is) and you offer me… a rack of ribs, or a steak, or blackened chicken with dirty rice, soup is coming second every day of the week.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Inside the £3.25m castle bought by Celebrity Traitors winner Alan Carr⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Oh, what joy! Another sleb who has millions to throw around on a vanity project while the rest of us are struggling to pay the bills! Ooh, will he change the wallpaper? Such fun!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨method acting⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Pffft. I’ve spent the last 30 years being a fat, lazy slob to prepare for my role in an as-yet unwritten movie about a fat, lazy slob.

  My time will come! Hopefully before coronary heart disease does.