Submitted 4 months ago by abs_mess@lemmy.blahaj.zone to showerthoughts@lemmy.world
Why couldn’t this call be an email? Why would you call, when you know that you are near indistinguishable from spam calls about Microsoft services and Nigerian princes?
For me an email is when I don’t need a quick response. A text is when I want a faster response but I don’t want to interrupt what the other person is doing. A call is when I want a quick response and I think it’s worth interrupting the person.
I very rarely call.
I think context makes a difference on whether a call is welcome or not, appropriate or not.
If the email asks me to write out a bunch of info I know off the top of my head, just call me. Don’t make me write out something that I can just tell you much faster.
If you’re asking something that kicks off a conversation going back and forth like if you need help walking through something, sending emails back and forth is annoying and dumb. Knocking it out in one call is faster and easier than exchanging 15 emails.
On the other hand, if you don’t need an answer right away, if you need documents or images or if you need to communicate about something that requires a record of the communication, email is better.
I have been annoyed equally by getting calls and emails when people use them for things when they aren’t ideal.
I can see both points. In my experience, people misuse calls more often, since a work-related call would often require a follow-up email anyway, but that’s more anecdotal evidence
For me it would help if there would be an option for me to see the at least the reason why the call is being made and also an estimated time of the call.
And with work related calls, it kind of makes me insecure to not know the topic beforehand. I don’t want to blob out some half information. Write it in email, I’ll see for it and get back to you.
For me it would help if there would be an option for me to see the at least the reason why the call is being made and also an estimated time of the call.
There is: the person calling can first send a short text asking if they can call you to talk about ________.
I was more thinking about as something that should be baked into the “phone app” from my point of view. So when the phone rings, I’m seeing who calls, why is he calling and what amount of time would he need. If I’m missing the call, I would also see these info in the recent calls.
Generally I get work emails to tell me things and work phone calls to ask me things. One twenty minute conference call could equate to about 800 emails going back and forth. (Also, some of our best staff don’t read and write (English) too well.
Calling is faster
Faster for the one who is calling, at the expense of the receiving person
Idk, it’s usually faster for both, no?
You can just answer your friend and say hello. lol
Ah yes, I want to listen to your “uuuhm” and “hold on, little Jon just shit himself”, incoherent, un-premeditated thoughts, with absolutely no proof of the contents of the conversation.
At the end of the phonecall, I’ll probably ask you to send me an email with a summary of what we talked about, because I can’t be bothered to keep all that mess you’ve just unloaded in my memory.
Unless you’re my dad or my mom, you’re sending me a message in a way it’s convenient to you.
Phone etiquette for the 2020s:
Message:
Hi, I wanted to talk about X. I think it’ll take about 5-10 minutes. When would be a convenient time to call?
This makes me irrationally angry because whenever I hear this, putting the time it took to ask would have been enough time to just type up a few sentences in an email that would explain everything everyone needed to know and then we’ve also got it in an easily searchable format so we can reference it later if needed.
I may be a little bitter.
I think it depends. If it’s a quick thing that requires no clarification, email or text all the way. But if you need to tease out fine details, a phone call is much faster and easier.
I greatly prefer messaging, but sometimes I call because it’ll take me 5 minutes to talk on the phone and 25 minutes to get it all hashed out through texts.
here we go, socially awkward redditors moralizing their awkwardness
With this attitude there is no way in hell you should or could be the leading authority on human conversation.
It’s called social anxiety. I’m so sorry someone being anxious is inconvenient to you.
Have you considered not commenting?
oh no you might be uncomfortable!!! that’s so sad. whoever calls you is totally responsible.
anxiety sucks but stop blaming others for it. it’s not their fault you choose to avoid the phone. maybe seek help for learning how to do a very basic human function instead of blaming others for it?
Why are you so upset?
because it seems like nowdays everyone isolates and pretends their discord relationships are real, and then complains when an actual human being calls them. there’s already no connection between people, no communal spaces, no in-person relationships. it’s so hard to see anyone anymore. and now you all want to shit all over one way to connect more directly?
and how almost every commenter in this space has the same mentality. it’s horrifying. are you all shut-ins? it reveals something dark about the kind of people that post on this site and really undermines other communities.
and seeing people moralizing mental disorders instead of taking responsibility for them. that does real harm to others. anxiety is manageable and treatable. retreating into these closed systems only exacerbates it, and encouraging others to do the same only exacerbates theirs.
Ok boomer, let’s get you back to bed.
I’m so glad that spam calls aren’t a thing where I live yet. SMS spam is a relatively new phenomenon here.
I remember a very rude university lecturer called me once when I was in Tesco. He asked me to turn off the Tesco self checkout because of background noise.
Something would get turned off really quick.
I think his wife did. He radiated big “divorced man” energy
My work gave everyone digital desk phones. The calls come through the computer.
I still barely ever get calls, and the Voicemail go to my email.
At my last job they assigned one of those to me and never told me. I had already been there about a year when I discovered it. I had like 500 voicemails. Haha.
owenfromcanada@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Shortly after getting a cell phone, I made a personal policy that most people don’t get a free pass to interrupt my life whenever they want (there are a handful of people on the short list, of course). I’ve had friends and family comment that I’m hard to contact by phone, and I’ve always pleasantly agreed (and explained politely if they seem interested). Even texts or other messages can wait until I’m at a good place to respond.
For me, having my phone on silent most of the time is a mental health thing. I know people that have their attention diverted every few minutes, and I have no idea how they survive.
Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Try having a brain that is compelled to actively search for new distractions, and
KnightontheSun@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Squirrel!!!
owenfromcanada@lemmy.world 4 months ago
My wife has ADHD. I feel you, fam.
Revan343@lemmy.ca 4 months ago
When my dad wants to talk, he texts me something like “Hey Stephen, give me a call when you have a chance”, and then I oblige when I have a chance. Most of the time it probably could have been an entirely text exchange, but whatever.
When my mom wants to talk, she just calls out of the blue, I don’t answer, and usually we don’t end up talking.
…I forgot where exactly I was going with this, but something about lining the call up beforehand
owenfromcanada@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Yeah, at this point, it’s polite to arrange a call, especially if it’s probably more than a minute or two. And as you’ve noted, it’s also more successful than a cold call.