Comment on A lot of societies problems would be solved if they taught about forming healthy relationships in school.

seaQueue@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

• PeleSpirit@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  It’s a cycle of madness though, how can they teach you something they’ve never been taught?

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  • sigmaklimgrindset@sopuli.xyz ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Through easy access to education and societal support, and a safety net.

    There are many parents out there who were able to break the cycle of trauma and raise children in positive environments. But almost every single one of them talks about how they had the privilege of the support of friends, therapists, teachers, obs/gyn doctors, whatever, to help break the patterns

    There’s a reason “It takes a village to raise a child” is an idea that is prevalent across so many cultures. The concept of the nuclear family was a tool to sell more real estate, and we are seeing the consequences of that societal shift today.

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    • intensely_human@lemm.ee ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      I’m pretty sure nuclear families predate concepts in history.

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      • sigmaklimgrindset@sopuli.xyz ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        While there is evidence of nuclear families existing as far as 5 000 years ago, they were only really for wealthy/high status people. The concept of the nuclear family as it’s own autonomous unit wasn’t really financially viable until post-Industrial revolution.

        There is even current academic arguments that the previously believed idea that Europe had moved to nuclear families as early as the 17th century may be flawed, as the surviving literature was once again biased towards the merchant/upper classes.

        Wikipedia has a good summary, actually, even though some of the claims are conjecture.

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• Zippy@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Possibly. How about the reality that people are simply not interacting in person but online. I can’t believe this is not the first post.

  Seriously go out to a bar, a music festival, volunteer, hell get drunk a few times and loosen up. In the 70, 80, 90 right up till 2000 this was every weekend. Hell it is not some work drone thing. That is an excuse. Work later in life is where you actually might meet some friends and from there have drinks after work and maybe that results in a random meeting with some ladies or men in your life.

  School won’t teach this. Life skills need practice not exams.

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  • Nepenthe@kbin.social ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Rewrite it for someone who doesn't drink.

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    • Zippy@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      You don’t drink? Just eat food. I joke a bit but I know many people that go to bars just for the music and social and a coke.

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  • sigmaklimgrindset@sopuli.xyz ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    While true, only one of those things you listed don’t require money, and tbh even volunteering is hard when you have to work 2-3 jobs to get by.

    Kids and adults these days don’t have 3rd places to just relax and hang out anymore. The internet is arguably the cheapest way to hang out.

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    • Zippy@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Sorry but our parents worked more than us and their parents worked more then them. Few people I know work weekends or don’t get two days a week off. Your parents worked normal 8 hours day then they went home and worked on their cars and houses and basically did another 4 hours a day doing of jobs. Their parents went one step further and built their own houses often or helped build them and grew alot of their own food.

      We might work similar or more formal hours but we work far less informal hours that at any period in history. So that does not hold much water to me.

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      • sigmaklimgrindset@sopuli.xyz ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        This is only true of certain segments of the working class, mainly the white collar workers located in Western countries. As we see wealth inequality increase globally, I don’t think it’s fair to say every single person is working less.

        Also kids generally don’t have money to go to bars, restaurants, or music festivals.

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  • bleistift2@feddit.de ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Seriously go out to a bar, a music festival, volunteer, hell get drunk

    As a non-drinker I find it interesting that 2 out of these 3 things require the use of a drug. (Yes I know, you can order water at bars, but I doubt that was the point of that statement.)

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    • Zippy@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      You have to have alcohol to go to a bar?

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      • Baizey@feddit.dk ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Technically not, but it would feel a bit like a ‘socially taboo’ to not drink

        Idk I’d at least put it as slightly awkward, like going to a bowling alley and not bowl, sure you can be social, but it’s weird to not join in

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    • intensely_human@lemm.ee ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Okay first of all, how many activities am I holding up?

      Seriously go out to a bar, a music festival, volunteer, hell get drunk

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• TheGalacticVoid@lemm.ee ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  No amount of reasonable legislation can force parents to teach this stuff. Doing it through schools is infinitely easier.

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  • Zorque@kbin.social ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    It also helps provide a social standard that anyone can relate to. Seems weird to demand that parents should be the ones solely responsible to make sure their children are able to socialize properly. That just means they're main reference for socializing is just their parents.

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  • intensely_human@lemm.ee ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Not everything has to be legislation

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    • TheGalacticVoid@lemm.ee ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      What alternative do you suggest that will be effective enough to not alienate children with parents who refuse to listen or think rationally?

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    • Leg@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Considering the sheer amount of time people spend in schools during essentially all of their formative years, it’d be a terrible idea not to implement legislation that could prevent maladaptive behaviors in our populace. Schools are already affected by legislation via the Mindless Drone Initiative established by our industrial forefathers. We might as well update things to make it a Healthy Human Endeavor instead. Finger-wagging at imaginary parents is going to do fuck all by comparison.

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• SkyeStarfall@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Bad parents exist. Should their kids just be doomed then?

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  • intensely_human@lemm.ee ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    No, their kids should not be doomed. However they are unless those bad parents get better.

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• captainlezbian@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  I think it’s not just that. I think part of it is overparenting. Part of these skills can only come from trying to practice these skills

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• blanketswithsmallpox@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

  Fwiw we are learning more and more that most of what makes an adult isn’t nurture at all. It’s almost all nature.

  Helicopter or hands-off parenting? The choice won’t impact a kid as much as you think. August 11, 20239:23 AM

  www.npr.org/transcripts/1193176710

  Also, great parents still end up with perfectly shit children all the time.

  People online just love playing the blame game on others for an individuals actions though lmfao. Poor upbringing, neglect, trauma, all of that is only one part of explaining someone’s actions. It doesn’t remove the responsibility and free will of the person commiting them lol.

  npr.org/…/sometimes-good-parents-produce-bad-kids

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