Comment on Just up the production quality and they'll love it, Trust me bro 👍

HerrNetzwwerk@feddit.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

• tanisnikana@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

  Put effort in. Poses, lighting, some measure of a narrative. Use a decent camera instead of your phone’s front-facing camera with the flash on.

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  • pmk@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    A narrative? Like, “Not only am I naked, I’m on my way to… water the plants. They are thirsty, and so am I… In the background, dimly lit, you can see an ESP32 microcontroller… yup, that’s the kind of guy I am… oh my, I can do pulse width modulation with my bare hands…”

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    • Credibly_Human@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      This probably bangs with autistic chicks

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      • Warl0k3@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        Hi I am an autistic chick and yes, please, this would without a word of a lie 100% absolutely work on me.

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    • SkyeStarfall@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      You joke but I’m being dead serious when I say that I’d enjoy it if someone sent something like that to me

      …I’d probably feel slightly lesser due to me struggling with coming up with something as creative as that

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      • TheJesusaurus@piefed.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        I’m gonna neg you, but cerebrally

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• yakko@feddit.uk ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

  You’ll just have to look at sexy dudes to copy

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• Tracaine@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

  Step 1: Be attractive. Step 2: Don’t be unattractive Step 3: Return to step 1

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  • user224@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    #include <stdio.h>
    int main(){
    step1:  /*Step 1*/ printf("Be attractive\n");
            /*Step 2*/ printf("Don't be unattractive\n");
            /*Step 3*/ goto step1;
    }
    

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• miraclerandy@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

  Get a fancy defused light, pose like the woman on the left, and get a tiara or some shit

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  • ryedaft@sh.itjust.works ⁨23⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    The woman in the left has the titties of a goddess and I’m just some middle-aged dude in IT

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    • miraclerandy@lemmy.world ⁨19⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Don’t let your dreams be dreams, brother. Use some of that IT money and buy yourself some nice titties

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• DScratch@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

  Sprinkle some flower petals around your zipper

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  • ivanafterall@lemmy.world ⁨23⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    I only have flour, does that work?

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    • DScratch@sh.itjust.works ⁨23⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Self raising?

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      • ivanafterall@lemmy.world ⁨23⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Nah it’s All-Purpose gurl u name it ;)

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• DagwoodIII@piefed.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

  obligatory

  https://www.ebay.com/itm/355004780167

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• rumschlumpel@feddit.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

  Mirror selfies tend to be better than just pointing your phone at yourself, especially when you’re trying to show off your erection. If you want to get fancy, get some kind of stand/holder for your phone, point a lamp at yourself, try some poses. Wear something fancy and suggestive.

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  • CanadianCarl@sh.itjust.works ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Get a top hat for you, and your boy.

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  • TheJesusaurus@piefed.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    You mean you all don't like to look at a cropped way too zoomed in poorly lit photos of meat tubes? Why?

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    • rumschlumpel@feddit.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Don’t forget the double chin, it’s important!

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• individual@toast.ooo ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

  search “Fabio”

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• Mac@mander.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

  There’s a woman on ig with multiple guides for this, actually. She posts a lot of them individually for free. Good shit.

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• TheJesusaurus@piefed.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

  If you wouldn’t just randomly whip it out and smack it on the table in front of her IRL, if that’s not the relationship you have, you can probably safely assume you shouldn’t be sending her dick pics

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• RaoulDuke85@fedia.io ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

  Put some 18th century literature in the other hand.

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