Maybe they aren’t including the time spent scrolling. It’s just the sphincter flexing moments that count.
Protoknuckles@lemmy.world 1 month ago
No way it’s only 12 minutes a day. On average!?
Archangel1313@lemmy.ca 1 month ago
AdamEatsAss@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Uhhhhhhh how big are your poops? 12 minutes of shincter flexing A DAY?
CmdrShepard49@sh.itjust.works 1 month ago
Based on your username, I can declare you an expert on the subject matter.
sxan@midwest.social 1 month ago
Oh. They’re not Adam. They’re Adam’s wingman.
Adam is too busy getting ass to waste time posting.
Chainweasel@lemmy.world 1 month ago
12 minutes at a time, 3 times a day.
Unless I’m at work.
40 minutes per day 4 times between 5:00a-1:30prumba@lemmy.zip 1 month ago
3 times a day? You should get checked for fructose intolerance.
feannag@sh.itjust.works 1 month ago
Generally, anything from 3 times a day to once every 3 days is considered the range of normal.
rumba@lemmy.zip 1 month ago
Could be. Seems every medical institution has different numbers, NHS says 3 times a day to 3 times a week.
My buddy was going pretty often, little wet, little dry, all over the place, a little gassy. 3-4 times a day for years. Found out he was fructose intolerant. One exclusion diet later and he’s in the one a day club.
Takapapatapaka@lemmy.world 1 month ago
This is a very appropriate thread to wish you a happy cake day!
Bahnd@lemmy.world 1 month ago
[Sing in the voice of Elmo] My boss makes a dollar I make a dime That is why I poop on company time.
UK version: My supervisor makes a pound. I make a pence That is why I shit at the companies expense.
gravitas_deficiency@sh.itjust.works 1 month ago
rumba@lemmy.zip 1 month ago
Hey I read it on they internet, it must be true.
The first search said 6m so I dug more.
Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Depending on the day I’m in and out in like 4 minutes or so. What are you eating that takes an entire sitcom without commercials to come out???
Protoknuckles@lemmy.world 1 month ago
I mean, not every time, but I’m also not speedrunning it. Thats my time to relax, meditate, contemplate the universe. And let my flower bloom slowly and surely.
Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Hate the mental image.
johsny@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Yeah, that hurt me.
Witchfire@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Pooping takes like a minute, browsing my emails and brainrot takes 29 minutes minimum
toynbee@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Sometimes, during longer sessions, I involuntarily think of that one old reddit story about a guy who put some hair removal chemical on his testicles then started watching some show while he waited for the chemical to work. Subsequently he got absorbed in the show long enough for the chemical to do its thing and far too much more. (In case you’re not familiar with the anecdote, he had to go to the ER but the member in question was apparently still functional if visually altered after a recovery period.)
I’ve never used that kind of ointment on my groin or anywhere else. However, sometimes when I start to get absorbed in some media whilst pantsless, my general anxiety makes me double check that I didn’t apply something for the first time ever, then forget about it.
whostosay@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Don’t forget 10 minutes of making sure no more doodies
macaw_dean_settle@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Four minutes or so 3 times a day would be 12 minutes. Some people go once a day others many. Saying your in and out in 4 minutes shows nothing.
RattlerSix@lemmy.world 1 month ago
3 times a day?
jerkface@lemmy.ca 1 month ago
21 times a week!
SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world 1 month ago
Bricks mostly.