0x01
@0x01@lemmy.ml
- Comment on [deleted] 3 weeks ago:
That’s pretty concerning, my mother went through a similar relationship early in her life, he was older than my grandparents.
You do you, but anecdotally, for her, the relationship may have started out okay, but they were never equal. He treated her like a daughter that he fucked every once in a while. Power dynamics in relationships are extra screwy when the age gap is more than 20 years. Our holiday dinners at home were always very awkward.
Their relationship lasted about 20 years, imo it should never have started in the first place. She remarried afterwards to someone her age and finally found some companionship instead of stewardship, that relationship lasted much longer
- Comment on [deleted] 3 weeks ago:
Super cool of your parents to support you like that, not cool of them to control you, most parents like this miss the memo that kids need to actually start making decisions for themselves.
By sunk cost fallacy, I assume you mean about the money. Giving them all the money back at once is an interesting idea, how would you feel if a child of yours did that? How would you feel if they were up front about their new situation?
You know your parents and your situation better than any of us, use empathy and put yourself in their shoes and make the best decision you can.
- Comment on [question] Help me access my local homeserver using a public domain name 3 weeks ago:
Then next I would examine the redirect and check your stack, is it a 302, 304, etc, is there a service identifying header with the redirect?
After that I would try to completely change your setup for testing purposes, greatly simplify things removing as many variables as possible, maybe setup an api server with a single route on express or something and see if that can be faithfully served
If you can’t serve with even a simple setup then you need to go back to the drawing board and try a different option
- Comment on [question] Help me access my local homeserver using a public domain name 3 weeks ago:
You set the A record to your internal ip address from within your router?
Nginx configs have a lot of options, you can route differently depending on the source context
So a couple questions:
- Do you only want to access this from your local network? If so setting up a domain name in the broader internet makes no sense, you’re telling the whole world what local ip within your switch/router is your server. Make your own dns or something if you just want an easier way to hit your local resources
- do you want to access this from the internet, like when you’re away from home? Then the ip address you add to your a record should be your isp’s public ip address you were assigned, it will not start with 192.168, then you have your modem forward the port to your local system (nginx)
If you don’t know what you are doing and have a good firewall setup do not make this service public, you will receive tons and tons of attacks just for making a public a record.
- Comment on what's a good answer to placate the c-suite if you're accused of lacking motivation and being unfriendly? 3 weeks ago:
It can be hard to put this into words well because it’s different in every situation and making universal statements are rarely correct but I’ll do my best
The problem here is twofold, 1. You feel insecure and 2. Your job is at risk
When interacting with people, not just at work, there are some keys to being well liked. You can be direct, but being direct often comes across as an air of superiority, as if you’re saying “I’m too good to pretend or do what everyone else is doing”. You’re saying you are above thinking about how your words will be received, and it’s the receiver’s job to avoid getting their emotions involved.
In a community, when one person considers themselves better than everyone else via this kind of “better than you” behavior, people will generally consider that person unfriendly or outcast them.
Capitulation and going with the flow of expectations is surprisingly one of the best ways to get ahead, it’s counter intuitive but debasing yourself for the ego of others (harsh way to phrase it, but true) can often make them amenable to just about anything you want. We are remarkably complex, yet fundamentally simple creatures, it doesn’t take much to make a person likable.
- Comment on PHP is the English of programming languages 3 weeks ago:
I see how you could draw that conclusion, but it’s definitely far from the default
madnight.github.io/githut/#/pull_requests/2024/1
Number 7 by github project stats
survey.stackoverflow.co/2025/technology#most-popu…
12 by stack overflow’s survey
- Comment on would you visit an authoritarian country if you had the chance to live there up to 4 weeks for free even if you believe multiparty democracy to be something non negotiable? 1 month ago:
The biggest issue with accepting free housing and other perks is the unspoken cost. What are the expectations in return?
I’ve spent time in taiwan and mainland china, as well as many other asian countries, china has its citizenry riled up in rampant nationalism thanks to the isolation of the people and propaganda. The propaganda of taiwan (and hong kong) being part of china is deeply rooted in the state sponsored group-think and is not going away any time soon. I will say the people I met, while angry when speaking about taiwan, did not seem to wish the people there any ill will, rather they seemed upset about the very idea of taiwan being separate.
That’s all to say, the political situation is complex. However the real question here is multifold. 1) is it against your chosen moral framework to capitulate and live in china and 2) if it is, what are your morals worth to you, what specific monetary amount would get you to renounce your views.
Parts of china are beautiful, the culture is lovely especially in rural areas, and living there could genuinely be nice. However your country is currently presenting the world’s largest bullseye and while your presence won’t swing the final result, if you feel you have a moral responsibility to stay and speak up, then do so!
- Comment on Who is the enemy? 1 month ago:
So do economists!
- Comment on 1 month ago:
This study is the first example of applying thermal effective theory to quantum information. The results of this study demonstrate the usefulness of this approach, and we hope to further develop this approach to gain a deeper understanding of quantum entanglement structures
- Comment on Why LLMs can't really build software 2 months ago:
I use it extensively daily.
It cannot step through code right now, so true debugging is not something you use it for. Most of the time the llm will take the junior engineer approach of “guess and check” unless you explicitly give it better guidance.
My process is generally to start with unit tests and type definitions, then a large multipage prompt for every segment of the app the llm will be tasked with. Then I’ll make a snapshot of the code, give the tool access to the markdown prompt, and validate its work. When there are failures and the project has extensive unit tests it generally follows the same pattern of “I see that this failure should be added to the unit tests” which it does and then re-executes them during iterative development.
If tests are not available or if it is not something directly accessible to the tool then it will generally rely on logs either directly generated or provided by the user.
My role these days is to provide long well thought out prompts, verify the integrity of the code after every commit, and generally just kind of treat the llm as a reckless junior dev. Sometimes junior devs can surprise you, like yesterday I was very surprised by a one shot result: asking for a mobile rn app for taking my rambling voice recordings and summarize them into prompts, it was immediately remarkably successful and now I’ve been walking around mic’d up to generate prompts.
- Comment on how do i make my own limitation free ai? 2 months ago:
Processing (cpu) doesn’t really matter as much as gpu, and generally the constraint is gpu memory on consumer grade machines. Processing via nvidia chips has become the standard, which is a huge part of why they have become the single most valuable company on the planet, though you can use cpu you’ll find the performance almost unbearably slow.
Ollama is the easiest option, but you can also use option and pytorch (executorch), vllm, etc
You can download your model through huggingface or sometimes directly from the lab’s website
It’s worth learning the technical side but ollama genuinely does an excellent job and takes a ton off your plate
- Comment on what are in you're top 3 favourite games of all time? 2 months ago:
Dragon quest monsters Final fantasy tactics Terraria
All legendary
- Comment on Peter Thiel’s bestie going mask off 2 months ago:
Teehee just kidding about my proposal to turn humans into petroleum… unless?
What an unfortunate collection of words to read on a Friday like today
- Comment on [deleted] 2 months ago:
You can, after a vasectomy, directly draw swimmers using relatively expensive but available procedures. If you desperately urgently want progeny after making the decision you don’t need to reverse it to have children. It would require in vitro.
Search for “SSR and IVF”
- Comment on Internet Archive is now a US federal depository library 2 months ago:
The Internet Archive has become an official U.S. federal depository library, providing online users with access to archived congressional bills, laws, regulations, presidential documents, and other U.S. government documents
- Comment on Hotels have developed a new revenue stream: "algorithmic" smoke detectors 3 months ago:
Many credit card software providers also charge for the investigation of chargebacks, to the tune of hundreds of dollars, even if the chargeback is reversed.
- Comment on Some thoughts on Surf, Flipboard's fediverse app 3 months ago:
Fuck flipboard and their stupid ass non disable-able default action on old samsung devices. I’ll hold that grudge till I die
You hit one button on your phone and it opened flipboard, an app I’ve never once wanted to open. Insanity.
- Comment on The universe has no concept of happiness or sadness. It is up to us to find things that make us happy (or sad if that's what we want). 3 months ago:
I love the freedom of nihilism, our brain chemicals are the only thing making us happy or sad, they create morals, love, hate.
You know what, I guess in a way hormones are more human than the brain itself?
- Comment on Can it take months to get over being laid off? 3 months ago:
The comments about seeing a doctor for depression are coming from a caring place, but the reality of being without work for a while means it’s hard to afford seeing a doctor.
Chemical depression is not exactly something you can work yourself through, there are some people who claim magic mushrooms can help, but I’ve not seen any conclusive studies.
- Comment on Why do people especially men care if someone forgives a cheating partner 3 months ago:
Nobody cares.
Your past posts tell a very clear story, I recall the post you deleted, the language and ideas you present are frankly pretty messed up.
You’re misattributing people’s response to your actions as general philosophies.
- Comment on can't be much longer 3 months ago:
I’ll take one for the team if he makes it to 10 years
- Comment on [deleted] 3 months ago:
It’s easy to confuse friendship with deeper feelings, human connection is weird.
If you’re not romantically into him, you won’t be in a thruple, you’ll simply be sharing your partner with your friend.
Monagomy isn’t for everyone, and arguably polyamory isn’t for many people at all. I’ve seen a few of these work out but it requires very different mindsets and your mindset right now sounds like it’s on the sexual side (considering it exciting) instead of on the relationship/partnership side. Excitement is short lived, exercise caution.
Don’t ask the internet, talk frankly with all parties involved. Be aware that the relationship may already have expanded past monogamy non consensually.
- Comment on Meta is Adding AI-Powered Summaries to WhatsApp 3 months ago:
Why not do it now?
- Comment on [deleted] 3 months ago:
I wouldn’t move to wyoming of all places, for sure, that place is hell on earth. The boston metro area is great for aging, especially as you get well into your 80s and your ability to drive flags. The lack of community infrastructure in wyoming will mean you’ll either die or have to go into a home as you age because how will you get groceries? At least in the boston area you have ready access to taxis and ubers and public transit everywhere.
Don’t forget that the politics of wyoming are vastly vastly different than the boston area, you’re going from one of the most progressive areas in the US to one of the most conservative states.
Living a rural rancher lifestyle requires hardiness and support structures. Most ranchers have generations in the same place, know their neighbors, have local community, etc. You’re coming in as a stranger and people out there hate outsiders coming in. It’s an expensive hobby and a hard job.
If you like dust, fires, wind, drought, mormons, republicans, big rig black cloud trucks, and guns you’ll probably like it.
- Comment on THIS always annoys me. 4 months ago:
And who pays the cc fees? And do they have an agreement with the cc provider for a kickback? There are so many hands involved with simple monetary transactions most people wouldn’t believe it.
- Comment on [deleted] 4 months ago:
We’re all gross, and we’re all ugly, and we all deserve love. You are included in that equation.
I’m sorry for your loss.
Sex is not the only part of a relationship, and being sexually attracted does not mean you should ever feel coerced into it.
Sex is embarrassing, gross, and silly. With the right person that’s okay and worth doing, with the wrong person it’s not. Your feelings of embarrassment are common and you’re not broken or anything.
For me relationships are about comfort and belonging more than physical satisfaction, maybe that’s the thing you’re looking for?
They say there’s somebody for everyone, no matter if you’re pretty or ugly, someone will find you beautiful and love you, try not to let your doubts keep that kind of person away if that’s something you’re hoping for.
On the other hand, relationships are just one flavor in the medley of flavors life has to offer, society may say you have no worth without an SO but that’s patently false.
- Comment on CRISPR-Edited Stem Cells Reveal Hidden Causes of Autism 4 months ago:
Given that the biggest neurological basis for asd is a lack of pruning of synaptic connections compared to neurotypical development, reasonableness likely would not from a full societal shift to asd.
Unfortunately the neural network of the worst among us wouldn’t be eliminated, just augmented, see the self proclaiming elon musk. Asd or not humans are still human, we all have our struggles and demons.
- Comment on what would it take for you to take back a partner who cheated on you ? 4 months ago:
Can’t think of one single thing that could convince me, since I’m monogamous that’s one of the few true dealbreakers.
A person has to draw the line somewhere.
- Comment on Has Slavic engineering gone too far? 4 months ago:
Very clearly yes, someday these tells will be gone but for now it’s very obviously ai
- Comment on "Can i ask you for a favor?" Is it rude to say no? 4 months ago:
More broadly, I think it’s appropriate to respond to social overreaching with rudeness.
In situations like these, I tend to just not respond but simply look at them. Awkward for everyone, but not aggressive on my part. Leave the ball in their court, if it’s a simple “could you take a photo” then whatever, but if it’s a less acceptable “could you buy me some smokes” then you’ve not mentally committed.