thefartographer
@thefartographer@lemm.ee
- Comment on lewd noodles 1 week ago:
Skinake is skinakey
- Comment on brains! 1 week ago:
OP has a baby in their head
- Comment on BIOMES 2 weeks ago:
Plain Jane?
- Comment on Bottom of the Ocean 2 weeks ago:
Uh, actually, it’s fish poopoos and peepees
- Comment on Comcast, Disney, and IBM Are Among Advertisers Returning to X After Ad Freeze 2 weeks ago:
Nuh-uh! Americans can’t be terrorists cuz Americans kill the terrorist, like Malcolm X and Jamal Khashoggi… Wait, are we the bad guys?
- Comment on Scientists Reveal Rare 450-Million-Year-Old Arthropod Fossil Preserved in Glittering Fool’s Gold 4 weeks ago:
They should prank some other scientist by asking them to image it under a SEM
- Comment on She-Ra Lives! 4 weeks ago:
Oh yeah? Then why am I always angry at everyone all the time?!
Boom. Scienced!
\s
- Comment on Read-onlys are cancer. Post stuff you want to see. 5 weeks ago:
I’d give you gold, but all I’ve got is lead and a particle accelerator. Good luck!
- Comment on The Starfleet Gazette Will Not Be Endorsing a Candidate for President of the United Federation of Planets 5 weeks ago:
Remember when Obama failed to stop hurricane Katrina?
I’m assuming their statement was meant to parallel this idiot thing that people started saying during Trump’s presidency
- Comment on Be a rebel, pick up trash. 5 weeks ago:
It’s really easy to tell the difference. The jellyfish is the one that hurts you immediately when you try to swallow it and the plastic bag is the one that causes problems in 1.5-3 minutes with catastrophic problems around 10 minutes.
- Comment on Be a rebel, pick up trash. 5 weeks ago:
Are you suggesting that we should burn down companies and factories? Cuz I’d never agree to meet you at a specific time and place so that we could disassemble the means of production and effectively delete entire toxic cogs of the economy.
In fact, tell me precisely where and when you plan on meeting so that I can definitely avoid you.
- Comment on Pressure vs Temp 5 weeks ago:
Couldn’t beer further from the truth. Son, I am not disappoint
- Comment on Pressure vs Temp 5 weeks ago:
No worries. I’ve never been more proud of you
- Comment on Pressure vs Temp 5 weeks ago:
I saw Frakes at ACCC a few years ago, that was pretty cool to attend his talk. Billy Zane was my favorite, though. As for LeVar, dude seems so cool, he’d probably sit and sing with you.
Worst experience I’ve had at a con: excitedly meeting Jaimie Kennedy (I was literally the only person to walk his queue) and finding out that he’s a mega-asshole. Also smells like an asshole. I threw away his autograph in front of him and told him that he lost his only fan at the entire con.
- Comment on Pressure vs Temp 5 weeks ago:
HOLY SHIT, FUCK YOU AND EVERYTHING YOU’VE EVER CARED ABOUT!
I wanted to go to Space Con and decided that it was simply too expensive, especially just a couple of weeks after going to see Rocky Horror Picture Show live. I hope it’s amazing and that the entire guest list actually shows up. A few years ago, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Rick Moranis showed up for their first cons and everyone assumed that Alamo City Comic Con was just pulling our leg, so I wouldn’t totally discount it.
And I’m up late cuz it’s the weekend and I gotta find some way to fuck myself over. Might as well be fucking up my sleep cycle.
The Freeman Coliseum isn’t way too far from me, so DM me if you wanna meet up and mutually murder each other or say hi or something.
- Comment on Pressure vs Temp 5 weeks ago:
Shit, I voted for you! I’ve handed out pamphlets that say “TexasDrunk: stealing daddies since 1997 and playing triangle in a punk folk cover band tomorrow.” I’ve offered to fart in a lot of pots and it’s been pretty unpopular so far…
- Comment on Pressure vs Temp 5 weeks ago:
Someone take @bigFab@lemmy.world’s car keys, they’re obviously drunk
@TexasDrunk@lemmy.world, please hand out the “TheFartographer has bad Ideas” pamphlets
- Comment on I'm back with another great recipe 5 weeks ago:
Yes, I’d like one slice of the cake-ass please. No box, I’m gonna eat it here.
- Comment on Pressure vs Temp 5 weeks ago:
Gender gas. I’m gender gas. Final answer, Regis.
Regis? Someone call a doctor!
- Comment on Pressure vs Temp 5 weeks ago:
The gender triple point, aka gender superposition, is where a gender can be calculated and estimated, but not observed. Attempting to observe the gender changes it to a different state.
In layman’s terms, this is also called “mind your own fucking business, your obsession with my genitals is fucking weird and creepy.”
- Comment on hard to argue with 1 month ago:
Tried it, didn’t like it. Guess when my wife says she doesn’t want kids, I’ll just have to listen to her lest she rail me up the ass. Beauty be damned.
- Comment on that's a huge sprout 1 month ago:
Cut it into quarters from base to tip and prepare a smoking-hot griddle or skillet, sprinkle coarse sea salt in the layers. Put a little high heat cooking oil on whatever cooking utensil you’re using and sear up both of the cut sides of each quarter. Once the first side starts to brown, flip to the second side. When the second side browns, pour some 5% vinegar on the cabbage and caramelize both cut sides. Slice up and enjoy one of the cheapest, easiest meals you’ll ever make.
- Comment on hard to argue with 1 month ago:
A. Username checks out
B. I can help you figure out your purpose serving men! But before you can walk, you must crawl. First, you’re going to learn how to hunt men. Then how to cook men. Once you’ve mastered these two, you will spend months or years learning how to plate men. Finally, serving men. Then you’ll be ready to start your own menstaurant. - Comment on Seeking feedback: how should lemm.ee move forward with external images? (related to frequent broken images) 1 month ago:
I say option 3. Sure, it’s annoying, but that’s our problem. Your problem is keeping the server operational, safe, and low-cost.
Considering the vote:content ratio, it looks like most users spend most of their time spectating. The spectators feed our egos and determine the trends in content by singular positive or negative votes. The spectator experience seems far more important to me and it should be the onus of the contributors to ensure their own privacy, just like they do in avoiding doxxing themselves via text.
Option 2 certainly follows in the vein of improved performance, but if real-world implementation is proving too unstable or creating too much overhead, then I say “fuck it, option 3 sounds great.”
- Comment on The 1900s 1 month ago:
We can’t possibly be that old! I feel you’ve made a grave mistake
- Comment on Horse-flippers? Have any horses from history, ever been fitted with horseshoes that improve their ability to swim? 1 month ago:
I don’t know what accent you intended to communicate, but I definitely heard it in my head
- Comment on Octopus 1 month ago:
That’s one of my favorite episodes. I felt so understood. I started taking pictures of animals’ butts when I mistimed a pic of a hippo swimming by. I was so amused that it was unlike any other photo you’d normally see of a hippo, but you knew it was a hippo. So I expanded to other animals.
After one trip, I mentioned to my family that I got photos of over 14 animals’ butts and my sister said “great, you can make a calendar now.” And so it all began.
- Comment on Octopus 1 month ago:
90% of my search history is animal anuses.
While I’m totally joking, I for realsies create calendars filled with pictures of animal’s butts that I take at the zoo
- Comment on Octopus 1 month ago:
Vs the usual octopus in anus or octopus anus insertion?
- Comment on Octopus 1 month ago:
Yes, you can enter an octopus’ mouth, wriggle around through its digestive tract, and exit their anus. And when you’re done, you can eat the octopus shreds from it popping like a you-filled balloon.