Die Hard: Five Nines
Devotion to duty
Submitted 9 months ago by CowsLookLikeMaps@sh.itjust.works to programmer_humor@programming.dev
https://sh.itjust.works/pictrs/image/9e3574b8-7fa7-4f72-9943-a96b06973d9b.png
Comments
agent_flounder@lemmy.world 9 months ago
jsalvador@programming.dev 9 months ago
Classic XKCD. I’d pay for a Die Hard version like this.
Diabolo96@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 months ago
I liked the idea so i asked bing to write a movie synopsis about it. What’s fascinating is that bing knew which xkcd comic i was referring to from my horrible description of it. Anyway, here’s next year mindless, generic Hollywood blockbuster action movie :
Server Down
Jack Bauer is a nerdy and obsessive system administrator who works in the basement of a high-tech skyscraper. He loves his servers more than anything else, and he will do anything to keep them running smoothly.
When a group of terrorists take over the building and hold the employees hostage, they cut off all communication lines, disable the security cameras, and demand a ransom from the government. But they didn’t count on one thing: Jack.
Jack notices that his servers are offline, and decides to take matters into his own hands. He crawls through the ventilation ducts, walks across broken glass, and kills anyone who stands in his way, just to reconnect his servers to the internet. He doesn’t care about the hostages, the terrorists, or the ransom. He only cares about his uptime.
But as he reaches the server room, he realizes that he has unwittingly become the only hope for the hostages. The terrorists have planted a bomb in the building, and they are ready to detonate it unless their demands are met. Jack has to use his skills, his gadgets, and his devotion to duty to stop them and save the day. He is the sysadmin, and he is the hero.
Server Down is a thrilling action-comedy that parodies the genre of Die Hard and pays homage to the geek culture. It is a film that celebrates the power of technology, the importance of passion, and the absurdity of heroism.
StrongHorseWeakNeigh@lemmy.world 9 months ago
I like the idea but I think it would be more fun to reframe it as a thriller movie from the terrorist’s perspective. They’re being hunted down one by one by an angry sysadmin and they can do nothing to stop him.
I think that would be a very fun horror b movie
thejodie@programming.dev 9 months ago
This is starting to make sysadmins sound like John Wick.
“And then my son, a few days after his wife died, you steal his 3d printers and smash his fcking Apple 1.” “The sysadmin will come for you, and you will do nothing because you can do nothing,”
Diabolo96@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 months ago
It would be a great action comedy if the story was set in japan and the sysadmin was a feared yakuza member. Kinda like GTA (great teacher onizuka).
marcos@lemmy.world 9 months ago
I’m pretty sure the comic was supposed to be a joke about Die Hard.
xmunk@sh.itjust.works 9 months ago
If you have any doubts… Observe the goatee.
IsoKiero@sopuli.xyz 9 months ago
Bing Chat (so ChatGPT) wrote an opening scene (or maybe more like a trailer, prompt was opening scene) too:
Semi-Hemi-Demigod@kbin.social 9 months ago
If Jack was really the World's Best Sysadmin the servers wouldn't go down when the power is cut off.
Also, he wouldn't rush to the security room. He'd hack into the servers remotely. No good sysadmin leaves their chair if they don't have to.
fckreddit@lemmy.ml 9 months ago
Now this is one movie I would watch, no doubt.
IsoKiero@sopuli.xyz 9 months ago
Firewall kinda-sorta plays with this idea, but all the tech is pretty stupid (and main focus, if memory serves, isn’t even in the technology). It’s not a bad movie as a hollywood 13-in-a-dozen action category, but it’s a far cry from “Server Down” we have here.