I know the question is a bit vague, but I’m hoping people will interpret this however they see fit an give their own experiences.
Being grateful every day for something, even small.
Submitted 1 year ago by dingus@lemmy.world to general@lemmy.world
I know the question is a bit vague, but I’m hoping people will interpret this however they see fit an give their own experiences.
Being grateful every day for something, even small.
Listen to and read science fiction books. Preferably in the bath tub. I don’t think there is anything more comfortable for me than that.
How do you not get the pages wet??
Keep the book above the water.
By listening to it on an audiobook with a speaker. I don’t bring paper into the bath. 😅
Waterproof e-reader
I’ve found that it’s easier to avoid misery than it is to find joy. Some tips given here reflect that as well. Cut off toxic people from your life. Don’t dwell on tiny things for the full day.
I have an example. I went to get some coffee yesterday. There was a man in front of barista counter. The barista asked me for my order, and my instinct was to ask if he had been served. I didn’t think twice about it. She got visibly upset at me for having the audacity to ask him. She took my order but she continued to mumble audibly about how she gave eye contact, and she knew how to do her job, etc. As if my remark towards the man belittled her experience and skills.
She had no idea what my intent was, but she assumed the worst. For doing so, she ruined her own day with it. Now she has an idea that there’s a guy at work who basically made her feel incompetent at her job, or that I’m a dumbass who doesn’t know how to order. It’s all about perspective.
I try to learn a little something each day, even if it’s as “simple” as how to pronounce a word or name. It’s a good way to try to get out of my head (as mentioned in another comment) and a means to keep myself humble.
There’s just so much I don’t know, and each little thing I try to learn is a good reminder of that and how much more there is to learn.
read books, play games, watch tv, walk the dog, love my wife, sleep
I like to create things. For me, its a nice feedback loop of positive feeling throughout the process.
I get to learn new skills in order to complete the thing I’m trying to make. At the end of the day, I get to feel good that I learned something new.
I get to work with my hands and throughout the process, I get to see the progress I have made. At the end of the week, I get to hold the thing as its coming along and feel good about the progress I’m making.
At the end of the month / few months when I’m done with the build, I get to feel accomplished as I have overcome the challenges along the way, and I have a finished “thing”
For the foreseeable time after, each time I use the thing I made, I get a little boost of positivity, because I get to think to myself “yeah! I made this!”
It also allows me to be social by sharing the thing I have made with other makers online, or I can help them with their projects by sharing knowledge I have accumulated.
I have aphantasia so one of my techniques for generating happiness while sad might be more effective for you than me… but if I’m feeling really sad, I try to imagine a kitten, riding a puppy, riding a baby goat, riding a baby hippo, riding a baby elephant. Baby animals are always cute and funny, the idea of them all balancing atop each other is ridiculous enough to make me at least crack a smile.
Usually the first step out of sadness or depression is like cracking a door open to reveal a shard of light. We have muscle memory linked to our smile muscles, so whether we feel like smiling or not, finding a way to crack one releases feelgood endorphins.
Then we can take another step towards being happier; exercise, tidying / cleaning our home, going for a walk, getting a task out of the way which we’ve been avoiding.
If you’ve never used Audible before, you can sign up for a free trial and keep one book forever; I highly recommend anyone struggling atm use this to get ‘Derren Brown - Happy’. The guy is almost literally a mind wizard, the first few chapters explain common self-help fallacies and why they’re not effective… iirc chapter 6 / 7 is when he starts introducing a toolkit to increase happiness. It changed my brain though, and I’ve listened to it several times now. Lots of very useful mental strategies and philosophical tools.
I take a little white pill every morning.
I’ve got a lot of good things, but I wasn’t feeling good. It got bad enough my counselor told me to see my doctor. My Doctor wrote a prescription.
I feel normal again. I didn’t know anything was wrong, but it was.
I focus on my daughter. Just the fact that there is so much new and fresh and amazing for her helps me see the world through a new lens a little bit.
Same, my boy is not even one week old… So much joy.
Biggest change in my life and I’m happy I have 6 weeks off to take care of him… I’m going to spend every minute I can holding him and being there for every small or big need he has…
I thought I was ready and then I had growing doubts the closer we were to the date but turns out I was ready and I’m so lucky…
I interact with my pets and engage in my hobbies like photography or reading up on interesting insects and mushrooms.
Bake muffins. Or bread. Or anything. Cooking distracts me and the result is tasty and sometimes I can give it away. Then people say nice things to me and for half a minute, I can convince myself I’m not a worthless ugly bag of mostly water. Don’t worry, the negative thoughts come right back, and the baking cycle begins again.
I walk dogs at a dog shelter. Makes me feel good, helps the doggos. Why not.
Lately I've found a lot of joy in raising my son.
Seeing him grow, seeing his smile, and being present in the moment because the first few years of his life are critically important and help define the rest of his life in ways that I don't think the literature has nearly caught up with yet.
Aww this is so sweet
There’s a youtuber named Martina who has EDS who uses a phrase “build a ladder” to describe how she helps herself feel better.
Here’s a link to a video she made to help out if you need help building a ladder yourself. Would highly recommend. You got this :)
Here is an alternative Piped link(s): piped.video/OSV27weHDC0
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I’m open-source, check me out at GitHub.
Gardening has been fun. Listening to the birds in my garden, hiking, taking walks.
I’m trying to focus on the journey of life more as I used to be a weekend warrior. But so much life happens between the weekends and focusing more on that had been helping me mentally.
As for finding meaning, I can’t answer that. I am in my 40s and have never found meaning. But there are things I enjoy, so I try to focus on the thing I find joy in.
I use Lemmy.
I’ve become just slightly hedonistic - I really enjoy things like tasty food/chocolate. On the other hand, I’ve stopped having too many expectations about my life; sometimes crappy things have to be dealt with or there’s more on my plate than is fair, but that’s just life so I roll with it and do what I need to do without agonizing over it.
I guess bottom line: I don’t sweat the inevitable crummy stuff and I try to really enjoy the rest.
A good song, something getting knocked over in a comedic way, the sun, etc.
I meditate for 20 mins every day
My lifestyle is unhealthy and would most definitely benefit from therapy. But that disclaimer aside, I have a few things I find happiness from. Listening to music is a big one. Over the past year or two I’ve transitioned to listening to mostly classical music, so I have a whole new world to explore in that genre. I’m currently listening to a lot of Shostakovich. Another big source of happiness is continuing to learn about programming. That’s kind of like a ritual that I’ve maintained since my school days. And one of my guilty pleasures recently is those stupid reaction YouTube channels. Not the obnoxious ones where they’re all like “WoaaaAAaa!!1” or whatever. But just regular people watching to comedic and music things.
As a big consumer of classical music, I eventually made my way over to soundtracks and have been loving those often more. I love the melodies that a lot of classical or romantic music has, but you get that mixed with more modern composing techniques. Not just movie soundtracks but shows or anything. One of my favorite I'd recommend is The Social Network soundtrack.
Ugh man that Social Network Trent Reznor score is sooo gooood. I love “Arrival”’s score too
I like having goals that I can achieve, whether that’s something at work I can knock out or a project I can work on at home.
What sort of goals do you have right now?
Right now it’s a little vague. I’m picking up bits and pieces of Python to automate stuff at my job.
Signed up to a self defense class which keeps me phisically active (unlike a gym that I can skip, the classes help me feel obligated to go) Eating healthy (more veggies, less sugary, oily or snacky foods) Long walks in nature (moves out of the city to live closed to an open field) Found a new hobby. And one that some might find weird - talking to myself out loud, just going through my thoughts and feelings this way helps me verbelise my feelings better, it really shows you how many toughts and feelings are actually much more complex then you think since you just don’t notice it until you have to put it into words.
play video games
okbin@kbin.social 1 year ago
i survive
this is how
i pet the cat
she say, “meow”