First half was kinda cool then BAM - INCEL
Comment on đżđđż
southsamurai@sh.itjust.works â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
If some lady brought out a conversation that fucking awesome, I wouldnât want a second date either. Iâd fucking propose. Well, would have. Thereâs very little sexier than enthusiasm and a love of knowledge.
And no, not literally propose, and it would hopefully turn into a second date, but thatâs no fucking fun to open up with in a comment, ffs, you fucking pedant.
Potatisen@lemmy.world â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
flicker@kbin.social â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
Agree to disagree. Thought it was a cute comment.
kilgore_trout@feddit.it â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
> explain that you wonât seriously marry a stranger who knows plants
> incel
kamiheku@sopuli.xyz â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
How so? I donât see it at all
abbadon420@lemm.ee â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
I think it works like this:
Donât see it at all
incell
Potatisen@lemmy.world â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
RIGHT?!
eatthecake@lemmy.world â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
If I tell women cool facts they wonât date me because women are boring and stupid
Sotuanduso@lemm.ee â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
Thatâs⌠not what this comment was saying at all.
southsamurai@sh.itjust.works â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
Alas, I fear that even when not drunk, the second status still applies.
Potatisen@lemmy.world â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
Awh!
southsamurai@sh.itjust.works â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
Just taking the piss, no worries :)
starman2112@sh.itjust.works â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
Dude pedants ruin everything. I canât tell you how many times Iâve had to explain the concept of hyperbole to someone
ParsnipWitch@feddit.de â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
Yeah, thatâs not my experience at all. Men say they want a girlfriend / wife talking about stuff like that, but itâs just not how they choose their partners.
southsamurai@sh.itjust.works â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
It definitely isnât the only criteria.
But hereâs what that kind of enthusiasm means in general; passion. Anybody that can love a section of knowledge so much that they can gush about it is a person that can have true passion for knowledge overall.
Thatâs a sign of an active, usually quick, mind. And that is something that anyone with sense wants in a partner.
I donât deny that people put women into a little box that says ânot of equal mindâ, if only by subconscious absorption of that behavior. It happens all the damn time, even by other women.
So, itâs obvious that plenty of men are going to be idiots that default to quiet or otherwise not enthusiastic women. And Iâve seen plenty of lesbians do the same.
But, a year or two down the line, they stop talking to each other, and things turn into this empty, dull rut. They turn into a caricature of a relationship where nobody is truly happy.
That idea is horrible to me. And, I donât think Iâm that big of an outlier. Not the majority for sure, but it isnât like the idea of wanting to partner with someone that can find joy in learning about something and sharing that knowledge is that unusual. Iâve known too many men that picked a partner with that kind of personality and mind.
ApathyTree@lemmy.dbzer0.com â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
As a woman with that level of enthusiasm about niche science info (I got a degree as a science communicator, because I literally canât help myself sharing interesting info when it seems a good time to do so)âŚ
Itâs very very difficult to find people who arenât intimidated by it, or put off by the enthusiasm about something they donât begin to understand/care about. Of all the people I talk to randomly, maybe 1 out of 30 people actually likes the enthusiasm past the first 5 min. And even that 5 min can be a stretch. That is to say, they tolerate it, they donât tend to engage with it or encourage it. Mostly you get âoh, thatâs neatâ. Which is a great way to shut the entire conversation down, cuz where do you go from there?
I tend to agree that enthusiasm is interpersonally attractive, itâs why I make small talk by asking what thing the other person finds interesting that they learned recently. (Not something they think I want to know, something they are interested in). I donât think the majority of the population views it that way, though. They only think enthusiasm is good if itâs a subject they already care about in some way. And they donât want to share theirs in case itâs not something you are interested in, even if all you actually are interested in is whatever sparks their passion.
I guess it could be my area, but Iâve been a lot of places (mostly within the same country ofc) and found about the same whether rural or urban, north or south. Also I donât think my observation is because Iâm a woman, but it could be a contributing factor, idk.
southsamurai@sh.itjust.works â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
Well, as much as I hate to say it, most people are so busy looking for their turn to talk that it wouldnât matter how interesting what youâre saying is.
Which, I get. Iâm not immune to eventually losing attention to unfamiliar material. But thatâs why you listen; you pay attention and ask about what they just said if you arenât familiar with it. If nothing else, let your brain perk away while you listen and wait for it to ring the bell of association! Until you get into some really arcane subjects, thereâs almost always going to be a point where something relates to something you already know, so itâs just a matter of being patient.
But, sadly, I think youâre right. Women simply get ignored, even by other women. Doesnât matter how much they know, how high their degree of expertise is. People tend to rank anything coming out of a womanâs mouth as less important. It certainly isnât the entirety, but I would agree it contributes, as you said.
Hadriscus@lemm.ee â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
Please nerd out over here, I could bathe in vulgarization all day
ApathyTree@lemmy.dbzer0.com â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
Clearly so, as you taught me a new definition - vulgarization - the act or process of making something, or of something becoming, better known and understood by ordinary people.
I appreciate that. Thanks! :) in that definition (and the more traditionally used one) Iâm a vulgar mf!
Unless you want to know about like magnetic tornadoes on the sun or how sponges are colonies of cells often using glass/silicate compounds in various shapes as a common skeleton (wouldnât want to bathe with those!! But each species has their own unique structure!), I havenât much off the top of my head without a good conversation to spark some back-of-the brain latent info thatâs stored and conversationally relevant. Iâm a steel trap for niche science stuff, and it often takes a good conversation to bring it out. How else do you know what info is worth sharing?
^_^
Hadriscus@lemm.ee â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
Astronomy is one of my bigger interests, but I donât know about magnetic tornadoes on the sun. Is that a regular occurrence ? Is the naming a callback to regular tornadoes because they are similar in some way ?
starman2112@sh.itjust.works â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
ApathyTree@lemmy.dbzer0.com â¨11⊠â¨months⊠ago
Iâll keep that in mind if Iâm ever your way :)
Because paradoxically, if you were actually the least interesting person, that would be pretty interesting.