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Comment on College Students Dump Dating Apps as Bumble CEO Steps Down

First thing to do is to not use neckbeardy scientific language like ‘find a mate’. It makes me think of the way ferengi say ‘Female’. It comes off as very creepy and lecherous.

Go do things you enjoy doing. Find local groups or hobby/card/game shops with events. Get to know people. Become a known person. And be yourself. Pretending to be anything or anyone you aren’t will always backfire in a real relationship.

The big thing is to never go out with the goal of hooking up or finding someone. It adds an extra layer of weirdness if you do meet someone, and a massive extra disappointment every time you don’t. Just be friendly and casual. Things will fall into place.

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slurpeesoforion@startrek.website ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
I assumed they were Australian.

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- Obi@sopuli.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  Different kind of mate.
  
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  - slurpeesoforion@startrek.website ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    Pirate? Arrrrrrr
    
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Fungah@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
I’ve only ever met people online.

And it’s allowed me to be the depraved slut I am today.

Let the squares go do square things.

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pinkdrunkenelephants@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
I’m not the one who needs help finding a partner. Everyone else does, and despite your emotional language you all have failed so hard at it it has harmed you as a people, so who is the one who needs to re-examine their language use exactly? Not me. I see animals cry and want to help them, and when I speak of animals, I use technical terms. And you all very much are animals.

Your society as a whole needs to have this talk with itself and that’s why I ask. Would a matchmaker program help you? Or will you get offended at being called an animal as if I am not one too and openly say as much, a lot?

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- Varixable@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  People tend to accept help quicker when it’s offered in a way that isn’t so cold and calculating. Going into a Mengele-esq diatribe about “animals” isn’t doing you any favors.
  
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  - pinkdrunkenelephants@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    Well then, let me tell you what people like you told me when I voiced similar complaints as a young’un: not everyone in this world is going to be nice to you.
    
    You’re the ones who are gonna suffer for not listening, not me. 🤷
    
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- Caradoc879@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  “People are animals”, “people are suffering without FeMalEs”.
  
  This is about the shittiest incel take I’ve ever seen from an ace. Shame on you.
  
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  - lolcatnip@reddthat.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    People literally are animals, and they never called women females.
    
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  - pinkdrunkenelephants@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    We ARE animals, and you ARE suffering without mates. It’s the truth whether you want to hear it or not.
    
    Being offended doesn’t make facts go away.
    
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- Smoogs@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  
  aromantic asexual
  
  Okay. Let’s pretend for a second here that you made a mistake(which I don’t believe you did. But let’s humour this anyways for anyone who might be actually believing your bullshit cuz I want to unpack a few things out of this little illusion you’re trying to spin here)
  
  Even as an explanation this is not a valid excuse after you went all this distance to invite yourself into a romantic spectrum discussion and act like a pretentious and victimized asshole suddenly making it all about you.
  
  This discussion was never about whether or not you were ever asexual nor aromantic yet HERE YOU ARE injecting it right there!
  
  It has nothing to do with sexuality. It’s basic manners. sexuality shouldn’t affect your social ability to even show an ounce of respect to the people you’re trying to connect with.
  
  Speaking of checking language: You referred to as ‘we’ in your OP of ‘finding a mate’ and the failure of apps. That’s misleading. And then refer to people as animals: you’re just purposely creating disconnection with this kind of language. Especially if you think that can be skirted under aromatic asexual. This isnt sexuality. This is anti socialistic symptoms.
  
  But that’s if I actually believed you were genuinely confused. I don’t believe you are. Heck I don’t even think you are what you say you are because that’s not how it should be brought up.
  
  Ever.
  
  You don’t actually give a shit about sexuality here if this is how you represent yours.
  
  You walked into this one with bad actor energy intent to troll. And then you get all ‘I’m a victim of your oppressed society’ Because someone did take you at a your word. You’re poorly combined words. You are not the victim in this scenario.
  
  There are times where society does stomp on the asexuals but inviting yourself into a topic to speak as if you’re romantic on a romantic discussion just to unmask yourself as victimized : this isn’t one of those times.
  
  You’re either a troll or you’ve got crippling antisocial personality issues(cuz this is some straight up dsmv bullshit but not to be unpacked here so don’t even get all ‘but I also got this too’ cuz too late! You already derailed this enough to be about you. Go somewhere else cuz I do NOT BUY FOR A SECOND this is a mere misunderstanding. This escalated way too far for that.
  
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  - pinkdrunkenelephants@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    Holy fuck, your first response to seeing an outsider tell you the truth about your situation is to clap back with a wall of text to assuage your hurt feelings?
    
    Why not listen to my criticisms, improve, and better your situation instead of immediately resorting to ego defense like some dipshit Karen who thinks he knows something when he really doesn’t?
    
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- canni@lemmy.one ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  It’s not “your society” it’s “our society” mate.
  
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5BC2E7@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
I just wanted to comment that this advice will likely minimize your chances of finding someone.

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- Caradoc879@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  “Go out and do things you enjoy and develop actual connections” is bad advice?
  
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  - 5BC2E7@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    pursuing your goal while acting like you are not pursuing it is counterproductive.
    
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    Caradoc879@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    Jesus fuck that’s completely misinterpeting what I said. I said DON’T go trying to hook up. Forget that goal entirely. If all you want is to fuck go to the bunny ranch in Reno.
    
    If you actually want a relationship, a genuine connection, Go to meet FRIENDS. If you’re an actually likeable person people will want to be around you and be with you. But this neckbeard incel attitude is incredibly off-putting, and it makes nobody want to be around you. It’s all self-fulfilling prophecy.
    
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SocialMediaRefugee@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
I found things worked out best when I stopped trying to specifically meet someone for the purpose of dating and just started going out and doing stuff I enjoyed with the potential of meeting someone (i.e. not sitting at home playing video games). There was a neighborhood pub I went to when I just wanted to get out of the apt, I was a member of a hiking club that had a cabin, I did stuff solo, etc. Once I stopped trying so hard I actually met more people.

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