[deleted]
Being creepy isn’t that simple
Creepy is how you behave, the way you carry yourself and treat other people
An age gap isn’t creepy in itself, it can be creepy, but it doesn’t have to be
[deleted]
Submitted 10 months ago by fabulous@feddit.uk to nostupidquestions@lemmy.world
Comments
FistingEnthusiast@lemmynsfw.com 10 months ago
medem@lemmy.wtf 10 months ago
This is the one thing that’s hardly ever mentioned in the whole age gap debate, though I would add that there are constellations that are creepy by default. Being a 35+ old man, I feel that I’m at kind of a landmark age where dating someone 20 years younger than me would be gross, let alone illegal in most jurisdictions, so the ‘it depends on your behaviour and intentions’ argument doesn’t really hold. In contrast, I can very much imagine dating a 55 year old woman - and no, it’s not a MILF fetish. So in the end BOTH the intentions/behaviour AND Gender AND actual age gap do matter IMHO.
GreyEyedGhost@lemmy.ca 10 months ago
I can’t think of a worse way to frame this discussion. There are significant differences between a 35 yo man dating a 15 yo girl and a 50 yo man dating a 30 yo woman, legality being just part of it. Swapping the genders doesn’t make it better.
FistingEnthusiast@lemmynsfw.com 10 months ago
Gender matters?
GTFOH with that shit
I didn’t disagree with you until that point
Takapapatapaka@lemmy.world 10 months ago
I’d say an age gap could be creepy in itself in some cases, like 18-30 years old or something in those areas. Not the case here though, at least not in my eyes. And really agree on the creepy comes from behaviour.
Ledericas@lemm.ee 10 months ago
I knew a friend who dated 17years older than she is, the mom was pissed and I thought it was a little weird and creepy, a 29 at the time dating someone 46yo is a big range. It’s a little creepy, but not like crazy like he’s been grooming her.
fabulous@feddit.uk 10 months ago
[deleted]captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works 10 months ago
Hahaha okay so let me bring you up to speed on the modern dating scene:
More than half of young men aren’t even trying to get laid anymore because of how fucking preposterous the dating scene is. Let that sink in.
Your prospective date heard one of her friends say “Oh! You should go out with my divorced dad!” and she’s actually entertaining this possibility. Why didn’t she find a man closer to her own age? What’s wrong with her?
What does success even look like here? For her or you?
FistingEnthusiast@lemmynsfw.com 10 months ago
I’m in my latter forties, and I find the world of dating to be pretty crazy. In the US, things are even more bizarre
I’m bloody glad that I found a woman mad enough to love me a little while ago!
I wish you all the luck in the world
edgemaster72@lemmy.world 10 months ago
Nope
SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone 10 months ago
A thirty year old woman is reasonably an adult. You’re not going to be grooming her or anything. The older you get, the less an age difference is really an issue.
Zwuzelmaus@feddit.org 10 months ago
Have you ever heard a 95 yo talking about 80 year olds? ;-)
MBech@feddit.dk 10 months ago
I suppose it’s about intentions, but as someone who always looked to settle down and find the person to live the rest of my life is, a big agegap can be pretty problematic later in life.
Like the obvious one: your partner dying while you’re still just middle aged.
Having to take care of an old person with old person needs as a 55-65 year old.
If they want children in a few years, OP could be 75 by the time the child moves out.
Again, it’s all about what the intentions are, but these things are worth considering.