Comment on [deleted]

sundray@lemmus.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

• StrongHorseWeakNeigh@piefed.social ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  As a teenager of about 15 or 16, I identified myself as brutally honest but I quickly got over that phase and realized that sometimes people want lies. Still, if somebody asks my opinion on something, then I will give it. I try to be tactful about it if it’s negative though.

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  • sundray@lemmus.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Good old fashion vanilla honesty is a good start!

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    • bizarroland@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Yeah, I mean, there’s a way that you can tell the truth in a way that hurts somebody and a way that you can tell the truth in a way that doesn’t hurt somebody.

      Like if your girlfriend has a fat ass and she asks that if her dress makes her ass look fat then you can say “the dress makes your fat ass look like the fat ass that it is” or you can say “it complements your curves”

      Neither one is a lie, but one is intentionally spiteful and hurtful, and the other one is like, okay, you obviously like the girl you don’t care about how fat her ass is.

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      • PancakesCantKillMe@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        “That dress does not make your ass look any different than it already is.”

        You’d think a non-commital blank statement like that should work. It does not. One then must explain themselves. Night out: ruint.

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      • TrippinMallard@lemmy.ml ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        There’s a 3rd scenario which is not having the ability to detect when you are expected to lie to be nice.

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  • Janx@piefed.social ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    It doesn’t even have to be lies! I think the key word you said is “tact”. We are adults, not toddlers. Most people actually empathize with the person they are talking to, not just blurt out whatever comes to mind…

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    • Echolynx@lemmy.zip ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Except a lot of adults are unfortunately still at toddler levels of emotional maturity…

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  • Tyrq@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I think it’s interesting where our minds go, mine went to being brutally honest about myself to other people, so it goes into tmi sometimes, and sometimes I do it to watch them squirm about something they asked

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