Comment on Is it safe to assume the guy i went out on a date with, just wants to sleep with me?

Derpenheim@lemmy.zip ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

• arumi@endlesstalk.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  He’s paying for every date even when I offer to split. I even mentioned I am not looking for dating in my current city because I am moving, but he still asked me out on another and also asked about the places I would like to go, he would take me.

  If he’s not looking for a romantic partner, which I mentioned in the post he’s not. Why would he bother doing all this? Just for a friend?

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  • Venus_Ziegenfalle@feddit.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    he told me that he handles his parent’s real estate company and is quite rich

    He’s paying for every date even when I offer to split

    Maybe he just doesn’t want you to worry about where you go/what you order/how often you can meet him for financial reasons. I mean it’s possible that he wouldn’t say no if it came to it. Nothing wrong with that per se. But from what you said I don’t think it’s all he cares about.

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    • arumi@endlesstalk.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I hope what you’re saying is true

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      • Venus_Ziegenfalle@feddit.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        I mean it’s not like you’re leading him on and you clearly said you’re not looking to date. Just go with the flow - I’m sure it’ll be fine no matter what ☺️

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      • TheDoozer@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        In college I had a guy friend (I’m a guy, both of us straight) who I’d regularly go to breakfast with, and he always paid because I was very poor, he made plenty, and he wanted company for breakfast. I regularly tried to pay and he waved me off. I think he knew that if we went back and forth, we’d go to breakfast a lot less because I wouldn’t be able to afford it.

        Maybe that’s what’s going on here.

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      • thermal_shock@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        You’re the only one who can find out. Also, sex is not a bad thing, it’s enjoyable, especially if you’re attracted to him. You don’t have to marry him, but enjoy yourself also.

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  • spongebue@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    He said he’s pretty well off. If he’s in a different financial situation than you he may be cognizant of that. Also, not that I need to tell you if you live there, but customs in Japan are all kinds of weird. That could be related too.

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    • arumi@endlesstalk.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I understand

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    • Sarmyth@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Yes, he is her senior by quite a bit. He would be compelled to pay under these circumstances.

      I’m American and we dont have such strict cultural roles, but at 37, I would have absolutely treated my much younger friends or coworkers in any 1 on 1 situation that I initiated.

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  • naught101@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Seems possible.

    But the answer might be highly culturally dependent, and also contingent on a tonne of extra context, so you’re probably not going to get a reliable answer from the internet.

    You could try asking him his intentions directly. Or telling him that you’re not interested.

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