Comment

Comment on Does anyone *not* love using their bidet?

s_s@lemmy.one ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

how do I use a bidet?

After pooping, you continue to sit on the toilet.
You turn the knob on the bidet handle.
The stream sprays the shit flecks off your asshole, they go down into toilet.
Then you use a tiny portion of the TP you are accustomed to use to dry the whole situation.

source

Sort:hotnew top

JGrffn@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
Alternatively, if your bidet has the strength and you’re manly enough not to be confused by getting ass fucked every day, loosen up a bit and let the mighty Poseidon fuck your ass, then push the water [and the extra poop] out once you feel the water mounting up. Repeat a few times, then tighten back up for the wiping shot.

Warning: this can make your anal muscles lazy, and it’s admittedly taboo to get ass fucked by your bidet, but I’ll swear by it until the day someone tells me it causes cancer, and then I’ll keep swearing by it until I get cancer.

source
- s_s@lemmy.one ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  I mean…I started out getting buttfucked by my bidet and now I’m leaning hard into being bisexual.
  
  source
  - DharmaCurious@startrek.website ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    This is interesting. I started out getting butt fucked by men, and now I’m very bidet-curious (because it might make it easier and more convenient to get butt fucked by men).
    
    source
    JGrffn@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    As someone who doesn’t get butt fucked by men, I think it WOULD be convenient; it’s a great and quick douching solution. I do think bidet water pressure and even positioning/toilet shape play a big role here, though, so do keep that in mind. I’ve installed a bunch of them in other bathrooms for friends and family and haven’t gotten as ass fucked by those as by the one in my own bathroom.
    
    source
    -> View More Comments
  - Noodle07@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    Forget the gay agenda, beware the bisexual bidet
    
    source
- TheDoctorDonna@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  So…you ass gargle? I am greatly amused, mildly curious and slightly horrified all at once.
  
  source
  - JGrffn@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    The horror fades away and the glory of a clean and sophisticated ass overcomes all.
    
    source
    TheDoctorDonna@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    All except weak rectal muscles apparently lol
    
    source
- Leviathan@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
  
  this can make your anal muscles lazy
  
  Do you have a source on this one?
  
  source