Submitted 1 week ago by Notacatonmars@lemmy.cafe to nostupidquestions@lemmy.world
I stumbled upon a list of the most popular p*rn subreddits and subreddits featuring milfs/old ladies are surprisingly popular.🤢 They can go visit any of the hot 18-20 year old subreddits and instead they waste time on old hags. Wtf?
Maybe people like looking at women who appear older than high school?
Or their own age?
What’s “hot” for you isn’t “hot” for everyone…
There are more things in Heaven and and Earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.
When you become an adult, 18 year old girls start to seem like literal children, and most normal people aren’t into that shit.
You realize that there are proportionally more “old hags” out there than 18-20 year-olds? And that there’s also proportionally more “old” people who may feel more attracted to those “old hags” that are closer to their age?
Since this community is for any kind of question, I’ll answer, but I get the vague sense that you don’t really want a genuine answer, based on the inherent bias you included in the question (calling someone older than 20 a hag is pretty uncool, for example).
But here goes: people have different tastes. Different things turn on different people, and your lack of experience being aroused by older women says nothing about the legitimacy of those who are. Also being 21 for example, is still considered very young by most people. Your question presumes that everybody in the world must only be attracted to very young women, and frankly that’s a bit strange and just not how the world works.
Try to put yourself in some other people’s shoes, and I think this question would answer itself. Your sexual preferences are not everyone’s preferences.
Thank you for the reasoned reply to this question. I had planned to write something very similar, but I was having problems being quite so measured. I hope OP reads your reply.
A few things:
experience. There’s a stereotype that older women are more experienced when it comes to sex and know their way around better than a younger woman would in pleasing a man. I think why that doesn’t go the other way is that men stereotypically get more lazy as they get older, finding ways to do less to get what they want or other ways (financial; sugar daddy) and they become less attractive whereas older women can be just as attractive, if not more, as they age or at least know how to maintain their beauty as they age.
a bit of taboo. A lot of guys with “mom’s friends”/teacher fantasies. It’s hot to think about one of your mom’s hot friends hitting on you to some guys. Then there’s the taboo of engaging in sexual activities with someone much older than you like your teacher in a setting that isn’t socially acceptable. We like what we can’t or shouldn’t have, often times. Speaking as a guy and having male friends, we’ve talked a bit about our fantasies like this and most of us have these fantasies.
I disagree with one point. Middle aged and older men are much sexier than youngsters. 30 minutes of experienced attention is better than 2 hours of poundtown jackrabbit — checking the clock.
Yeah this is going to definitely come down to a lot of subjective opinions. I was speaking more so in generalities where you’ll likely meet more guys into older women than you will women into older guys. But that also has a lot to do with the ages we’re talking about too because in high school to young adult years, many women definitely prefer older guys, but as women get older, that changes for some women. Whereas most guys seem to be drawn to older women throughout their lives through and through, until you get to a certain age, around midlife crisis age, where more guys do want younger women.
It also changes depending on cultures too, as I’m speaking for my area which can be drastically different than somewhere else in the world.
The lower bound on what age a person has to be before being sexually attracted to them goes up as you age, well past 18-20 by the time you’re in your 30s. However, this lower bound does eventually slow or stop, and finding a 40 year old attractive by the time you’re 60 doesn’t feel nearly as weird.
So I’d imagine it’s because basically anyone of any age can find a 40+ year old woman attractive without feeling like a creep, whereas most people start aging out of finding 18-20 year olds attractive by the time they’re in their 30s.
I’d be willing to bet money you’ve got some very suspicious porn on your PC.
southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 1 week ago
Alright, number one, you’re a fucking douche. I’m going to answer anyway, but grow the fuck up and stop being a walking pimple.
I got interrupted a dozen times writing this, so don’t expect it to be smooth from paragraph to paragraph.
First, attraction isn’t inherently drawn to youth, even when people are young. Youth can be attractive, but it isn’t universally so. So, your premise is flawed from the foundation. Attraction is complicated.
One of the major components of it is how our brain looks for viable mates, on a primitive baby making level. That means part of what we look for is about fertility and probably viability for child rearing.
That’s actually the reason some teenagers will be attractive to anyone and everyone; they simply look like they’re fertile and developed enough to be a parent in that primitive, animal level where common sense doesn’t exist.
However, most teenagers don’t look attractive to most adults, and sometimes not even to other teenagers. Why? Because our brains expect a certain degree of development before it starts the arousal cascade. If you can’t impregnate the potential mate, they aren’t really a potential mate.
For the female body, for women that are going to look fertile and viable as a parent, the body hits the range of looking right typically in the late teens to early twenties (using the Tanner scale as the basis), but extends well into middle age, even for the kind of woman-attracted people that are ageist. Why? Because people are really bad judges of age tbh. Even post-menopause, not every woman looks past fertility.
Conversely, showing signs of aging doesn’t mean you’re past fertility. Ever run across someone that’s dealt with addiction, had a hard life, and you think they’re old? You can abuse your body hard enough to look old in twenties. I’m talking discolored, wrinkled skin, patchy hair going gray, all of the stereotypical crap that’s not only caused by actual aging.
So, that’s part of it. People are attracted to things other than youth.
I’m getting some meatspace interruptions, so this is a little scattered, but that’s the idea.
Second, a lot of what we think of as pretty, or beautiful in terms of features and secondary characteristics is formed before puberty. It’s even fair to say that some aspects of it form way before, even before we form accessible memories.
The faces and bodies we’re exposed to growing up don’t tend to be mostly teenagers. So our foundation of beauty preferences under normative development aren’t either.
Third, you underestimate the power of being hot for teacher, or hot for Stacy’s mom (or Stiffler’s), or your friend’s mom.
Horny kids, particularly horny teenage boys, they see that hot mom, teacher, grocery store clerk, nun, nurse, or whatever, they’re a giant pulsing cock. So every woman is a fantasy potentially. If/when they have positive interactions with these adult women, that builds a layer of positive associations in the brain saying “this type of look is good”, and that is very easy to link such sexual feelings.
As we age, we also tend to be most exposed to age peers. So we date age peers more. Which means those layers of positive feedback age with us. That’s part of why teenagers will think someone is hot even when they’re covered in acne, smell like an axe body spray truck hit them, or maybe look like Tammy Faye Baker is their makeup artist, are underdeveloped and look like babies. That’s who they’re around, so they ignore the stuff that’s unattractive on average.
So, an adult finding another adult attractive enough to masturbate to isn’t unusual at all.
And then, it’s about sex too
Tony young men know that young women are going to be unlikely to have sex with them. So do young women that are into women, but I kinda get the impression you’re a guy, so I’m leaning towards that in all this. So, when a young dude sees a MILF, the M in MILF becomes really important because, when it comes right down to it, if they’re a mom at all, there has been jizz inside her. Tracy that sits next to you in trig, or your 101 course at community college ain’t fucking you and may not be fucking anyone. But Tracy’ mom? She puts out! At least once.
That may seem weird, but on a subconscious level it matters. And it keeps mattering. Even when you’re old and gray, and wanting a nice fap, who are you going to fantasize about? That damn near infant that can’t even buy a drink, or that fine-ass woman that has had a decade to learn what she wants and might be willing to tell you about it? I’m picking the one that is going to be more likely to be a good partner, though not every adult man would.
And that’s also true. Plenty of guys my age think the way you do, that barely old enough to vote is somehow more desirable because the skin is more elastic.
But here’s some truth for you. I’ve been fucking since I was 14, off and on. I’ve fucked some of the same women as adults that were girls when I fucked them as a teenager. Without fail, every single one was better with age. In my twenties, fucking women from the same age range you idealize, on up to a couple in their fifties, I can say that youth does not a good fuck equal.
Oh, there’s more athleticism during the college years, yeah. But serious, making your toes curl good sex? That takes practice. I’ll trade the extra bounciness of youth for the ability to communicate in the bedroom every single time.
Those “barely legal” age range models? Yeah they’re pretty. But not more pretty, just younger.
Seriously here. You’re probably a guy. You need to reflect on yourself. You gotta grow the fuck up. If you don’t, then by the time you’re my age, you’ll be the creeper drooling over practical children compared to you, and still not getting laid. You don’t want to be that guy. Nobody likes that guy.